Q. Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper?
A. He sold his soul to Santa.

Q. Why are women's breasts like a train set a kid gets at Christmas time?
A. Because they were originally made for children but the father wants to play with them.

Q. Why doesn't Santa have any children ?
A. Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.

Q. What do blacks and Christmas trees have in common ?
A. They both have colored balls.

Q. How are a Christmas tree and a priest alike?
A. They both have ornamental balls.

Q. What's the difference between snow men and snow women?
A. Snowballs

Q. Why did the snowman have a smile on his face ?
A. Because the snowblower was coming down the block! This woman walks into a tattoo shop and asks for a tattoo of a Christmas tree on her right inner thigh and a cocktail drink on her left inner thigh. The tattoo artist says, That's an unusual request. Why do you want two tattoos there? She answers, So my husband will eat between Christmas and New Year.