“Too
late” Tonya responded flatly.
“What?”
“Hey, I
couldn’t help it. It just popped in
there.”
“Wow. I didn’t think you thought of me like that.”
“It’s
kind of hard not to. I wonder about you,
Marcus. I wonder what you’re like. I wonder what you like. I’m sorry.
I should not have said that.”
“No, it’s
okay. I must admit I’ve had my thoughts
about you.”
“You
have. Share them with me.”
“Say
what?”
“Tell me
and I want details.”
“Right
now?”
“Yes. I’m waiting.”
“Okay. Let’s see.
We’re sitting in my living room.
Candles are lit and there is a fire in the fireplace. Music is playing loud enough to fill the
room, but low enough for us to hear our whispers. We are sitting on the couch. I’m sort of reclined again one arm and you
are sitting between my legs. You have on
a flowing black gown that compliments you just right and reflects the light
from the fireplace. My arms are around
you and I begin by kissing the back of your neck. I lean you forward just a little and caress
your shoulders as I kiss lower and lower down your back. I pull you close to me and you turn your face
so that we can kiss. The kiss is soft
and slow at first, but as my hands slide across your gown, the kiss becomes
more passionate. I feel you press back
against me as I caress your legs and stomach.
Tonya, are you still there.”
“I’m
listening. I’m listening. Go on.”
“I think
that is enough.”
“Marcus,
you can’t leave me hanging. Go on”
Marcus
did go on. He slowly described touching
and caressing her; how and were he would kiss; and how they would make
love. Tonya was silent. She was lost in his words. With her eyes closed she saw every detail
Marcus described. She didn’t want him to
stop, but Marcus finally was silent.
They both were until Marcus asked
“Was that
foreplay?”
“Yes”
When
Tonya got to work each morning, she looked for an email from Marcus. Sometimes there was just a note to say good
morning, Sometimes there was more. When
she got to work on Monday she found
Sitting still and quiet,
Like a picture frozen in time
I begin my journey,
A journey in my mind.
To a place that is neither past nor present
Neither now nor then.
Nor is it here or there.
It’s not where or when.
It is a place where you and I are forever
And our love shines bright and strong.
Where I hold you close as we dance
To the wind singing our song.
Where flowers bloom in homage
To the lovers that we are
And each twinkle in your eyes
Is the birth of a new star.
A place where clouds
above
Yearn to be earth-bound.
And just to be in your presence
Rainbows seldom leave the ground
Where the sound of your voice
Sends ripples across a cobalt sea
Sitting still and quiet
The world of you revolves in me.
Wednesday she was
greeted with
Good morning, my sun. I am so glad you rose today. You cannot imagine how dark my world would be
without you. My world is all the
brighter because I know you. I do know
you. I know that stepping into your
presence is like an internal sigh; the release of a breath held since I last
saw you. I know that looking into your
eyes is like wading into a still, calm pool; my soul held aloft by your
gaze. I know that your smile is a
thousand brush strokes upon the canvas of my heart; painting eternal
memories. I know that your voice lives
and that it dances though out my being, summoning me ever closer. I remember conversations. I remember thoughts. I remember expressions. I remember me with you. I know how you make me feel. And the difference has been made
On Thursday morning Tonya called Marcus.
“Good morning” she said when Marcus answered
the phone.
“Good morning. How are you?”
“I’m fine and you?”
“I’m fine.
I’m glad you called. Did you say
that Ryan is going to be out of town to a pre-season football game?”
“Yes.
He’s going to one in Friday in
“And didn’t you say your daughter was going
to some camp for the weekend?”
“Yes, she’s leaving this afternoon. Marcus, what’s on your mind? You’re not
coming here are you?”
“No. That
wouldn’t be a good idea. But I have one
that is.”
“Well, what is it?”
“You’ll find out tomorrow morning. I have to go now. Don’t call me until it’s time.”
“Until it’s time? Marcus, what are you
talking about? How will I know when it is time.”
“You’ll know. Good-bye”
“Marcus”
“Bye”
“Marcus!”
“Bye.
I’m hanging up now”
“Marcus!”
He had hung up. Tonya couldn’t believe it. She had to wait until tomorrow to find out
what was going on. But she had no
choice. She knew that if she wrote
Marcus, he wouldn’t respond and if she called him he wouldn’t answer. So, she waited until Friday morning. When she got to work, she rushed to check her
email and there was nothing. She checked
her email constantly for the next 2 hours and, still, nothing. And no phone calls either. Then Fed-ex appeared in her office door and
she new it was Marcus. She signed for a
medium side box. Inside the box there
was a cell phone, a smaller box, and a note that said “It’s time!!” She used
the cell phone to call Marcus.
“Hello.”
“Marcus, what is this?”
“Oh, that’s a cell phone. You know, modern technology.”
“Marcus” Tonya said, drawing his name out.
“Okay.
Every weekend you go home and I have to wait until Monday just to talk
to you or get an email. I know you can’t
call me from home or from your cell phone.
So, that is a cell phone you can use this weekend. There is a pre-paid Fed-ex box you can use to
ship me the phone tomorrow when we are done.
Now I can call you at
“You better now call me at
“Well, ma’am, you know I try.”
“Is that right? Sometimes I wonder what you
are trying to.”
“Ah, that’s easy. I am trying to make sure that when all else
fails around you, there is one thing you know without a doubt – there is a man
in this world who loves you with everything that he is. I want you to know that there is someone who
sees you; really sees you. Someone who
sees the things you don’t dare show; the parts that you are afraid to
share. I want you to know I see you and
I love you.”
“Well, you’re doing a good job.”
“Do you want what I am giving you?”
“Yes, I do”
Marcus and Tonya brought the conversation to
an end, but Tonya used the cell phone as soon as she got into her car to drive
home. They talked about whether she
liked
“Marcus, do you ever think about us being
together?”
“I do, but I try not to think about it. In a way, I don’t want your situation to
change.”
“Oh, so you don’t want me?”
“No, that’s not what I am saying. It’s just there is no way we can be together
with out something traumatic happening in your life. I don’t know much about your home life, but I
have to believe that it is at least all right, if not perfect. Otherwise, one of you would trying to get out
of it. So, for the situation to change
would mean something has gotten worse or something bad has happened. I don’t want you to have to go through
that. I don’t want you to have to go
through Ryan breaking your heart in order for you to be with me. And I don’t want you to go through something
happening to him either. I guess one of
the biggest reasons is your daughter.”
“My daughter?”
“Yes.
She deserves to have her parents intact.
She shouldn’t have to see something happen to her father or find out her
father hurt her mother or anything like that.
Of course, I want you, but I am not so selfish as to have what I want at
the expense and tragedy of your daughter.
I love you too much for that.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Just say you’re welcome”
“You’re welcome”
“Okay.
I need to do a couple of things.
I’ll call you back at, let’s see,
“That’s a date.”
“It is isn’t it?”
Marcus and Tonya both got ready for their
date in much the same way. They both quickly
put things away like they were expecting company. They both ate a bit, but found they weren’t
really hungry. They both took showers
and considerable time grooming even though they wouldn’t be seem. They both dressed in something that was
comfortable and homey, but also something that they thought the other would
like. And they both turned off or turned
down most of the lights in the two houses.
Promptly at
“Hello.”
“Hello.
It’s your date. What do you have
planned for the evening?”
“Well, for this evening I thought I would
start off by sharing some of my poetry with you. I’m sharing it because you inspired it. So, get comfortable and enjoy the poetic stylings
of Marcus Austin.”
“Okay.
Let me get right for this.”
Tonya turned off the lights, lit a couple of
candles, and got comfortable on the couch again.
“I’m ready, Mr.
I remember
I remember the first time I
noticed you,
The way you smiled, the way
you moved, the way you walked.
I was seduced by your
presence, lured by your eyes.
Happy to be captured and led
by the way you talked.
I remember how I spent my time
daydreaming,
I dreamt of you once again
coming my way.
I dreamt of being valiant,
brave, and chivalrous
I remember dreaming of what I
would say.
I remember how we grew
together
And you became my hope and
center of my life
I remember how we went from
holding hands to holding hearts.
I remember wishing you would
one day be my wife.
I remember falling in love.
Tonya snapped her fingers in approval
“That was nice. Read another one”
“As you wish, my lady.”
Love
Matters
"What
does it have to do with anything?"
"What
difference does it make?"
"Is
love reason enough?"
"Was
loving a mistake?"
In
matters of love it’s easy,
To
charge love with the blame
Or
accuse loving of lacking,
Insufficient,
even lame.
And
what does love matter?
Well,
this is what I've found.
It
is not love that causes the stormy seas
That
run our ship aground.
It
is selfishness and jealousy
That
breaks love's spell.
It
is insecurities that lead us
From
the path love knows so well.
It
is our unfaithfulness
that
mocks love's embrace
And
through pride we drive away love
Until
its gone without a trace.
But
love can make a difference
But
only as much as we allow.
And
the reason of love can only be weakened
By
the resolve of our vow.
So
I vow that in matters of love
I
declare to the nth degree
That
loves is what matters the most
Because
your love matters most to me.
Tonya snapped in applause.