Before Shampoo molested Cartman, she did the same thing she did for Mrs. Cartman.........she showed them both how to use protection..........(why, what were you thinking?)
          "Ohhhh, so that's how it works!" Amazed and awed, Cartman and his mom forgot all about trying to molest Shampoo and went to the streets to try them out. They just happened to run into Barb, who was right in the middle of her affair with Ms. Chokesondik.
          "Would you like to join us?" asked Barb.
          "Sure!" yelled Cartman, eager to try out his condom. Having some trouble figuring out how to put it on, he remembered how Mr. Garrison had showed the class how to do it and asked Barb if she would help him out.
          Barb said, "Sure...I'll help you out right about...NOW!"
          On that signal, Ms. Chokesondik's huge knockers turned into bazookas and blew Cartman and his mom away!
          "Thanks for your help, Ms. Chokesondik," Barb said, "Here's the industrial sized nipple cream I promised you."
          "Cool, well I better get back to screwing Mr. Mackey."
          "Okay, catch you on the flip side."
          So with Ms. Chokesondik's help, Barb had eliminated two of her opponents, but there was still that damned Shampoo to worry about.
          Meanwhile, Shampoo was having sex with that hoochie mama, Gracie Lou Freebush.
          "Ooh, Shampoo! You sure are my Miss Congeniality!"
          Suddenly, a bunch of Barb's hired hitmen, including Fat Bastard, Katie (NOTE: Barb's friend), and Dr. Evil burst in and surrounded her.
          "The jig is up, Shampoo! Surrender now!"
          "Oh God Dammit," yelled Shampoo. Shampoo decided to whip out her Jackie Chan moves on all of Barb's hitmen.
          Kicking all of their asses took about 20 seconds, but soon after, Shampoo turned to Barb.
          "Your ass is grass, and I'm gonna whoop it! I'm gonna open up a can of whoop-ass!"
          Barb being as queer as she is, surrendered and went to go have hot passionate sex with Katie's boyfriends (NOTE: It's too complicated to get into). But one of them broke their weiner, so Barb tried to make it all better...by shooting it off (what? That would make me feel better...). She decided to revamp and think up a new plan. She decided to ressurect the only people who would be able to help! PRINCESS PICOLLO AND TRUNKS AND RAY!
          "Okay guys!" she said, after she had brought them all back to life, "It's time to destroy Shampoo!"
          Unfortunately, the princesses just wanted to, you guessed it, BAKE! Trunks ripped off his dick and baked it into a fruitcake.
          Meanwhile, Shampoo was sitting, drinking a martini and receiving a lap dance from Mr. Moane (NOTE: our old vice-principal)...there was some rapin' going on there...
          Picollo came to Shampoo's rescue...well, actually, he just wanted a piece of Mr. Moane...but...at least Shampoo got off the hook.
          Meanwhile, off in a corner, Ray looked really lonely and asked Barb to *CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED* Barb said, "Ok!", and they *CENSORED* all night!
          Or so you'd think...except...now. Ok so anyways...
          Suddenly all these helicopters descended and out jumped...A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WITH MULLETS!
          "Noooooooo!" Shampoo screamed, starting to run.
          "Come Shampoo! Come to Sand Creek with us!" (NOTE: Can you tell this was written the night before Shampoo moved?)
          The mullet people started killing everyone and shooting grease out of their mullets.
          "Shampoo!" Barb cried, "The only way to beat these people is to work together!"
          "Fuck that!" Shampoo cried. A wave of grease nearly hit her just then.
          "Okay changed my mind," she said.
          So all the people in this gay story got together and tried to fight this evil...
          The mullet people started moving closer, and closer yet!
          "Oh no!" yelled Barb. "How will we ever beat all of these mullets? They're too powerful!"
          Shampoo decided to think of a fool-proof plan to defeat them.
          "I've got it!" Shampoo burst out. Shampoo whispered her brilliant plan to Barb a couple of times before she finally understood what to do.
          Suddenly, both Shampoo and Barb started running, all the while bursts of grease were being shot at them.
          "Look!" said Shampoo. "It's the river! Now all we've gotta do is jump in!"
          *SPLASH!* Without realizing it, the mullet people fell in the river.
          "NOOOOO!" They all screamed. "We're becoming...CLEAN! NOOOOOOOOO!"
          "Alright!" Barb cried, as the mullet people melted into a big hunk of crap. "We did it! Woo hoo!"
          The world was saved thanks to their brilliant plan. But that isn't the end of our shitty-ass little tale...

          Shampoo was wed to Ryoga Hibiki. Vegeta became so wildly jealous that he ripped off his penis and tried to beat Ryoga with it, but it was so limp it didn't do much. Vegeta died of bood loss.
          Barb married Kenny McCormick. They were last seen beating off the family dog together.
          As for our title characters, Princess Picollo and Trunks and Ray, we find them happily in their little kitchen baking away. Suddnely *BOOM*CRACK*CRASH*
          Suddenly, in walked Mallory, who had apparently been gaining weight non-stop.
          "Daddy Bunches!"
          All three of the princesses turned around.
          "Yes?" they said.
          "Where's mommy?"
          Suddenly, an ear-shattering noise was heard.
          "I'm right here honey!" in stormed Denise, food and all. "Where's my sandwich? Oh GOD DAMMIT! I'm to beef-caked to fit through the door again!"
          Okay, so not all the bugs have quite been worked out of the kingdom since the infamous "Shampoo vs. Barb Fight", but it's getting pretty damn close. Queen Shampoo, Queen Barb, King Ryoga, Kind Kenny, Princess Picollo, Princess Trunks, and Princess Ray all rule together. And the kingdom is...
          "HEY! WHAT ABOUT US!"
          "YEAH! THIS ENDING IS LAME-O BUNCHES!"
          Denise, Mallory, shut the fuck up. The damn story's over. Go home.
          "NO! I REFUSE!"
          "YEAH! WE DIDN"T HARDLY GET ANY TIME IN THIS STORY AT ALL!"
          That's because you suck and everyone hates you. Get lost.
          "BUT WE..."
          CLICK! BOOM!
          *Denise and Mallory fall to the floor dead*