| Mallory: So listen. Here's the thing. Do you by any chance like opera? Sam: The opera? Mallory: Yes. Sam: You mean to go and watch and listen to? Mallory: Yes, Sam. Sam: Why do you ask? Mallory: Because, as it happens, I have two tickets to the Beijing Opera tonight at the Kennedy Center. My father's seats. Sam: You're asking me out on a date. Mallory: No. Sam: No? Mallory: No, I'm asking you if you would like to go with me to see a world-renowned opera company perform a work indiginous to its culture. Sam: Right. And in what way will it distinguish itself from a date? Mallory: There will be under no circumstances sex for you at the end of the evening. Sam: Well. I, like most people, am an absolute nut for Chinese Opera, the Chinese being known the world over for their romantic and soaring melodies And what with your guarentee that there won't be sex, I don't see how I could say no. Mallory: Good then. I'll come to get you about 7:30. Sam: Good. And y'know what's good about this? If you hadn't come along with your offer of Chinese opera and no sex, all I'd be doing later is watching Monday night Footbal, so that works out great for me. Mallory: 7:30. Sam: Yes indeed. Mallory: The Assistant Secretary of Transportation. Sam: yes. Mallory: Do you mind if I ask you a few questions? Sam: Sure. Mallory: During the campaign, you crafted a significant portion of the President's stump speech, did you not? Sam: yes. Mallory: The acceptance speech at the convention. Sam: Yes. Mallory: Inaugural. Sam: Yes. Mallory: State of the Union. Sam: Yes. Mallory: And now the President wants you to write a birthday card. Sam: Birthday message. Mallory: For the Secretary of Transportation. Sam: Actually it's the assistant - Mallory: Oh, the Assistant Secretary of Transportation. Sam: yeah. One of them. Mallory: Sam, if you didn't want to go wth me, you should've said so, and if you started to chicken out, you should've called. Sam: I didn't chicken out. Mallory: I'm all dressed up, Sam. Sam: My shoes are shined. Mallory: Shut up. Sam: this is something that came up, Mallory. Mallory: It's his fiftieth birthday, Sam, they couldn't have seen it coming for like the past fifty years? Sam: Fair point. Mallory: Sam - Sam: Half hour. We'll get there by intermission, there'll be plenty of death and shrieking the second act. Mallory: Go. Sam: You look fantastic. Mallory: Go. Mallory: Would you come on?! Sam: What are you, Ralph Cramden? Mallory: Sam - Sam: Like I'm not under enough pressure? Mallory: It's a birthday card! Sam: I don't care if it was a cupcake recipe, Mallory, I was asked to do it by the President of the United States! Mallory: What? Sam: I said I was asked to do it - Mallory: No, you weren't. Sam, did you by any chance tell my FATHER we were going out tonight? Sam: Yes, yes I did. Mallory: Excuse me. |