Mallory: I'm sorry to be rude, but are you a moron?
Sam: In this particular area, yes.
Mallory: The eighteenth president was Ulyses S. Grant and the Roosevelt Room was named for Theodore.
Sam: Really?
Mallory; There's like a 6' painting on the wall of Teddy Roosevelt.
Sam: I shoulda put 2 and 2 together.
Mallory: Yes.
Sam: Look, the thing is, while there are a great number of things I can speak about with authority, I"m not good at talking about the White House.
Mallory: You're the White House Deputy Communications Director and you're not good at talking about the White House?
Sam: Ironic, isn't it?
Mallory: I don't believe this -
Sam: Wait, wait.  Do me a favour.  Please.  Can you point out Leo McGarry's daughter?
Mallory: Why?
Sam: If I could make eye contact with her, make her laugh, y'know, see that she has a good time, it might go a long way toward making my life easier.
Mallory: These children work hard.  All of them.  And I'm not very including at this moment to make your life easier.
Sam: Ms. O'Brian, I understand your feelings.  But please belive me when I tell you that I"m a nice guy having a bad day.  I just found out the Times is publishing a poll that says a considerable portion of America feels the White House has lost energy and focus.  A perception that isn't likely to be altered by the video footage of the President riding his bicycle into a tree.  As we speak, the Coast Guard is fishing Cubans out of the Atlantic Ocean while the Governor of Florida wants to blockade the Port of Miami.  A good friend of mine is about to get fired for going on television and making sense, and it turns out I accidentally slept with a prostitute last night.  Now would you please, in the name of compassion, tell me which one of those kids is my boss's daughter?
Mallory: That would be me.
Sam: You.
Mallory: Yes.
Sam: Leo's daughter's fourth grade class.
Mallory: yes.
Sam: Well, this is bad on so many levels.
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