"When he shall die take him and cut him out in little stars and he shall make the heaven so fine that the world will be in love with night and pay no worship to the garrish sun." - R & J
"He sewed his eyes up because he is afraid to see - He tries to tell me what I put inside of me - He's got the answers to ease my curiosity - He dreamed up a god and called it christianity - Your god is dead and no one cares - If there is a hell I will see you there." - NIN, Heresy
"Its like a hostage situation... except no one is actually holding us hostage and we can leave whenever we want..." - Analysis of life, Me
"And I hate myself just enough to want him..." - Poe, Psycho
"The only thing that distinguishes actors from liars is the boundary of their stage." - Me
Somewhere in the darkness; of humanity; Must be some fire in the blackness; My soul is a fleeting thing, dancing in the wind; Up and Down; I am fire; I am sorry; because I'm depressed: seriously;
There can be but one thing in life before me, but the sheer wall in front of me; Bars it; Takes it; Takes it from my grasp; So close, yet a life-time away; And here I am.
And I talk to Ciara; Ciara, the one who I loved; Who gave me comfort; Who helped me to reach past the bars.
And still does; Unwittingly; She is there; As I am here; And we are here; Right now, before us a world!
Cloaked in black; a soggy coat; a showering umbrella; a cold bed.
Because I love the world that hates me; that pushes me away. That thing I seek but cannot find; And injustice abound; and inconsequence is here; put before us; on an alter; to behold; an almighty force with only the whole universe with which to share. And here I sit, as unimportant as I am, a mindless lemming; and ant; to be out aside for another day.
Oh, but Ciara!
You bring me joy; and I love the sound of your voice; and you make me happy.
But I am here; and you are there; and there are ants everywhere. And I still cry; someplace in the sky...
And I will not see the rainy blithe. It all matters; every last word has profound meaning of deepness, of time.
I cannot comprehend. Yet I try; yet I try; yet I try to buy the sky, and fly and forward into the wind.
JUST LISTEN!
HEAR?
And in some yonder dawn, we all sit in a field of poppies and watch the rainbows fly; and Snicker bars; and the shit town lights; the bum on the street; It means everything to me.
I love you
and everything; and this earth; which I HATE
And I will die; I will be no more; and I am NORMAL; and those whom we love ARE HUMAN and they will die!
And I will be no more; and I cry; in the sky; surrounded by the meaning of life; What if I died?
What difference? At some time in the future people would smile again; theme parks would be filled; and I would be another stone in the garden of death; Gone and forgotten. That's how much we matter.
Yeah; have fun; be happy; smoke pot; party...
But that's it; That's the meaning of it all.
Ciara, can I ask you something?
- Will Leonard
One night Will and I were talking via AOL Instant Messanger and between fragments of conversation, he dictated this entire piece. I think it's gorgeous. Luckily, I saved the conversation and every time I read this I get more out of it. I have edited it quite a bit, because like I said it was within the text of a conversation. It really belongs on a poetry page, but because he said it, it's a quote...
Will's Website
"If we sleep together will you like me better?" - Garbage, Sleep Together
"Sometimes I feel it burning, that deep and primal yearning, I feel it burn, burn, burning... I try to live without it, but then I think about..." - Poe, Fingertips
"Confession is good for the soul but dangerous for the heart..."
