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JESSICA!!!!!! |
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Just to warn you... Jessica is very Jessicaish! Here I shall post Jessicaness and I also have a story to tell you... It is about Jessica... Jessica Is also Ashkaka and Blossom and Jeshee Cohaha and Befiba Bohbebla... and of course Jessica is Jessica cuz if she wasn't what would Jessicaishness be? That's what I thought. Now it's Jessica time! |
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The Jessica Story! |
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Once there was a Jessica... Her name was Jessica.. She strolled along one day and found a penny... with that penny she bought the first cheap assed house she could find. She then fixed it up. Since she was so ashamed of the penny boughten house before she fixed it up so she didn't take a picture of it.. but below is a picture of it after it was fixed up. |
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Notice the American flag... This was placed there when her one true sex toy lover boy, Bradleykins, moved in with her and they got married. They then bought a cat... It's name was Jessica. Jessica, Bradleykins, and Jessica were the happiest ever then Jessica got pregnant, Bradleykins lost his job as a vacuum tester, and Jessica went insane, climbed up a tree, ate a bird's ass, and then scratched her own eyes out. Jessica was sad but too pregnant and fat to go buy a new cat so she bought a pool instead. Bradleykins then got a job shaving the testacles of various animals. All was going well until about 2 months before Jessica was to go into labour, a giant lady who made all her clothing out of flowers came along... First she started out just stealing flowers from Jessica's gardens to make her thongs but eventually she began making bathing suits... Jessica went up to the 600 pound fat fuck and said "Bizatch you be stealing my flowers!" The fat bitch then replied "Well you stole my pool so I am allowed to steal your flowers so I can swim in my pool! Now stop stealing my flowers or I'll throw my pool at you!" Jessica then Pulled out her magical gun and shot the fat whore in the stomache and threw her in the pool. She then said "Have a nice swim" and she covered the pool and sold the house. |
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Jessica and Bradleykins began searching for a new house in some strange far off place called France. The found the perfect house! And It didn't have a pool or any fat ladies that tried to steal the flowers... Jessica was sure she'd never have to kill again.. boy was she wrong. One day she was out horseback riding when suddenly her water broke and she remembered that she was pregnant. She rode her horse to the hospital and was in labor for 69 hours... She was happy with this time because it reminded her of the fair night when she got pregnant. When Jessica got to the hospital she saw that it was burnt down! |
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She was about to question the cause of the fire when she saw 6 jolly lepracauns riding away on cows with blow torches. Suddenly a train being hijacked went zipping by and Jessica, desperate, rode after it. She then saw a tall radiant blonde haired hotty named Bryan *sigh* in one of the train cars. She rode up to him and he swept her off the horse and offered her assistance. She was nervous that she would not be able to resist her urges so she asked him to deliver her baby blindfolded. This made her way more comfortable knowing that Bryan *sigh* would not be peeking. Jessica gave birth to the most beautiful babies ever! Yes BABIES! She had twins. A boy and a girl. Below are pictures of Moochi and Michi. |
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Click here for more Jessica |
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Click here to go back to Individual dedications |
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