| Beatrice Lee, 29, executive, single Is this so that non-Muslims can �legally� play the field? Murugiah claims it will help to reduce the number of kids born out of wedlock � I don�t think it�s logical. If that were the case, it�d be better to have sex education (if you can�t be good, at least be smart!) or religious/moral education. Polygamy isn�t going to reduce illegitimate kids because the �forbidden fruit� is always more tempting than what you already have. Wonder why he didn�t claim that it�ll reduce rape incidents too? Murugiah should look into self-restraint, self-discipline, better moral and sex education or just read the papers to see how far women have progressed since the dark ages! There�s a lot to be said for the �one-woman man� and the �one-man woman�. Zikri Fardi, 25, businessman, married with one child Polygamy has its advantages. If a married man wants to take another woman, it is better that he marries her instead of stringing her along. It is better for him to do the right thing and raise her up to the status of wife. However, this depends on whether the man is financially and sexually capable. If he feels that he can handle two households, I don�t see anything wrong in it. It�s better than fooling around with women, which in the long run is only detrimental to both parties. Angeline Raj, late 30s, communications executive, married From reading in-between the lines of the report in the newspapers, I guess this could be due to the number of politicians having extra-marital affairs � probably trying to legalise this infidelity! I think a wife would probably share her husband if there�s money � lots of it. I know a few second wives and mistresses. One of them does not like her position because she cannot attend public functions with her �husband� � but I suppose she is �happy� because of the money that he gives her, which I believe is a lot. There is one other person who is in this type of situation and she has children from this �marriage� � she feels that she has no choice because of the children. This makes it difficult for her to leave him. I personally feel that is a very chauvinistic proposal � once legalised, women have no choice but to comply. It would be a step backwards for the development of women in Malaysia, which just nullifies the work of women�s organisations |
| K. H. Lim, 48, consultant, married with three kids I guess this came up because some people felt that second wives or mistresses had been victimised. To be fair, they are seeing it from one angle. But you must address the problem at its roots. What is the intention of marriage anyway? One man, one woman � more than that, it�s a third party. As for men taking on more wives � sometimes it has to do with the women themselves. I know a man who married again because his first wife was so busy with the children and he felt neglected. You have to play the role of mother and wife, but that doesn�t excuse the husband from going out and looking for another woman. And of course, it�s fashionable when a man has more than one wife. It�s like a symbol of success: I have arrived; I can afford more than one. Mohammad Abdullah, 43, businessman, married with five kids Aiyo, one wife is best, no need to go and look for another wife to jaga-lah! It would be better to look after your kids. If you have problems with your wife, getting another wife won�t make those problems go away. You should always talk to your wife, try to work things out. I think one should only marry another under the most extreme circumstances, say if the wife runs away and you need someone to take care of the kids. Polygamy should never be an issue of sex � though that seems to be the case judging from the news these days. Mutual care and concern should always come first. David Khor, 42, company director, married with three kids Murugiah has a point � protect the rights of the wives. But I do not advocate polygamy as that is not in the creation plan: one man should have one wife and vice-versa. People take a second wife for many reasons � I believe that it is due to a breakdown in communication and relationship between the husband and wife and the lust of man. I have a friend whose husband is keeping a mistress almost half his age. I would not want to be in her shoes as she is going through a lot of stress, heartache, insecurity, and is very depressed. My family just visited her over the weekend and it so happened that her husband was back to see their 12-year-old son. You could sense that the house was emotionally empty. I feel sad for the family and ask myself, what has the innocent child done to deserve this? You may have some very strong arguments for polygamy, but we have taken a vow: till death do us part. |