MY WAY TO GOD

About Me

I'm a Jew from the former Soviet Union. I was born in the town of Orsha, Belarus. I lived in Leningrad after WW2. In 1991 I arrived in Boston.

Common situation

All Soviet Governments were always anti-Religion. They destroyed churches, synagogues and religious schools. In Leningrad many churches were destroyed or used for storage or plants. Many Priests, Rabbis, and other religious leaders were sent to prison. The state education of a child began with kindergarten, and continued in school, and into the institute, etc. Education was communist and atheistic. Private education was forbidden. All newspapers printed articles against religion or religious holidays. Jews especially were deprived of language and Jewish culture. In Leningrad there was one synagogue, which the government showed to foreigners. It was built before the revolution and represented note worthy architecture (In Leningrad there were 300 thousand Jews.).

We could not buy a Bible or Torah or other religious books in a book store or borrow them from the library. When foreigners wanted to bring Bibles or other religious books across the border, they would be confiscated.

Communists, komsomol (young communist), pioneers (young students), maybe 70% of the active population of the Soviet Union, were forbidden to go to church. A person who went to church, especially the synagogue, could have trouble at work or at the institutes or schools.

In the 80's the parents of a small number of families provided little information to their children and grandchildren about Jewish tradition.

The parents of most families did not provide anything about Jewish tradition to their children and grandchildren, because they thought that did not offer happiness to them (that happened especially in well-educated families). The connection of the generations was lost.

The government produced the atheist, as the plant produced cars. Educated people thought that all things could be explained by science.
The three generations of people that rose within the era of the Soviet government were almost all atheistic.

I did not like when the many Soviet Jews in America imagined themselves superior and cleverer than religious people in America. I respect American atheists, who can make their choice freely. Atheists molded the Soviet people. They did not have any choice.

In the 1980s the Bible appeared, but it could be bought only illegally for about two months' income for engineers. Of course you could not buy any Jewish calendar in the bookshops. In the beginning of the 90's you could buy a Torah and other religious books in the used bookshops. At that time the commission book shops were permitted to buy the religious books. The Torah, the first book of Tanach, cost about 100 rubles, though the similar book in regular shops cost maybe 5 rubles. (The' Soviet Revolution happened in 1917.)

My experience

I know nothing about religion. In school we studied the pre-Revolutionary compositions by some Russian writers, such as Tolstoy, Pushkin, Lermontov. Those were the only compositions that the censors permitted us to read. They wrote sometimes about religion. Religion seemed to me like an anachronism. Once I went into one of the remaining churches, and I saw ten old women. I thought, "They will die and religion also will die."

Maybe in the 1950's I seemed to be interested in religion. When I went to the Hermitage I saw many religious pictures. I did not understand them. I began to study religion with the help of anti religious literature. Book shops had enough of the anti religious literature. That was very interesting.

I investigated our region's library. I found only one serious book by an ancient author against Christianity. (The censors from Moscow, forbidding books in the libraries, were, very educated people.

I read the New Bible in the 1970's. My coworker gave it to me. It was published before the revolution (1917). I read the Old Bible in the 1980's. My friend gave it to me. I knew that the Torah and Old Bible were similar.

I went to the synagogue the first time in 1984, when I became a retired person and lost my job (In the soviet union that happened at the age of 60 years.) I did not go to the synagogue before that time because I worked at the military institute. The KGB checked people in the synagogue (secret photograph) and I could have had a problem on my job. I saw 10 old persons in strange clothing. Among them was one young man. I knew later that he was a Canadian tourist.

Right now I live in Boston. I am glad to live in America, a free country. I am studying English, Hebrew, Jewish tradition and the religious service very hard. It is easy for me to wear the kipa and kiss the mezuzah.

Conclusion

I know about different branches of the Jewish religion: reform, conservative and orthodox. I understood that these branches answer differently the question about who wrote the Torah: Moses under the dictation of G-d, or other people. People at all times make mistakes. I believe only what was written by G'd. The Jews survived for 3000 years only because of orthodoxy. I try to connect myself with the Orthodox Lubavich direction.

If I die at the same age as Moses (120 years old) I will have had enough time to take myself back to my Jewish roots.

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