Goddamn. Goddamn it all. As you can tell, I stopped the last one. More important stuff came up.
I�m lowering my medication � It�s not doing anything useful, but now I�m feeling worse every day. But I DON�T want to go back on that stuff. I realy don�t. I hate the way I am. I hate how cold I am, how uncaring I am. But that�s the way I am, short of changing it through drugs.
But am I really that cold if it makes me feel so terrible?
I mean, if I�m guilty about all this, doesn�t that mean I care?
Doesn�t it?