bluemonkey

9/11/00

Today Sonia and myself discussed the ways in which the current flooding problems could be approached. She came up with several suggestions, which we then both proceeded to think about and sum up the pros and cons for each.

IDEA 1- To make the houses out of paper.

Pros: When the water washes them away, they are easily rebuilt. They are very cheap. They can also be written on in pencil and so may tackle the problem of inner-village house-side grafiti by enabling youths to rub out their vile and villanous vandalism (alliteration... ooooh).

Cons: The houses will have absolutely NO form of stability and cannot have electricity or water supplied to them easily. Inhabitants may be prone to paper cuts when opening doors/windows. Mushy paper is NOT attractive. This would involve a lot of sellotape/glue, which if not cleared up properly (ie put back WHERE THEY SHOULD BE) small children may decide to conduct sick and twisted medical experiments on each other due to their neglection and the fact that they are forced to live in a house made of paper.

IDEA 2- To make the houses out of ice.
... It was decided that the walls would in fact be frozen and kept frozen with huge freezing devices. These devices would, in effect, cool the water to below 0 degrees and therefore turn it into a solid. This is also known as freezing. Also, any water that were to come into contact with the wall would also freeze instantly, adding to the house/walls.

Pros: Water and water are the same thing. Therefore the walls will already be familiar with the molecular structure of water (as it is itself water) and be able to treat the water with due care and attention, making sure it no longer feels neglected and can go home and stop attention seeking. Water will also freeze to the water (as explained above) and therefore thicken/strengthen the walls. The walls are also cold. As a result, they are not hot.

Cons: As the water freezes, it also sticks the doors and windows to the walls. This means that any attempt at escape is impossible for the residents of the house. Privacy is also threatened by the translucent walls. Heating in the house may also prove to be troublesome due to the walls existing on the basis that there is not much heat around.

Conclusion...

Seeing as neither of these solutions actually seem to be solutions, we concluded that we were not trying to solve the problem of flood damage to society or the people within it, but to make a house able to with-stand the flooding waters easily. Therefore we succeeded and some other fool can take it upon themself to answer this unanswerable question. The question is... Is the Blue Monkey ready for this excitement? Or is he ready to return to the zoo? As for now, that question shall remain............ Unanswered.