A New Day
Chapter 28
Ten minutes after Brian had left AJ's house, Howie pulled up outside. He wasn't supposed to be here this soon, but he had a feeling that AJ needed him, and as he had finished packing, he saw no reason why he should wait any longer. As he had got closer though, an uneasy feeling had settled in his chest, that had only intensified as he had got nearer to his destination.
He pulled up outside, and almost ran into the house, unable to shake the feeling that told him he needed to be with AJ now. Opening the door with his own key, he called out for AJ, expecting him to answer. When he heard nothing, Howie was worried, the feeling that something was wrong growing more intense by the minute.
He looked around the foyer, trying to work out where to look for AJ, his eyes settling on the staircase.
Howie took the steps two at a time.
He rushed along the corridor and skidded to a stop outside AJ's bedroom. As he rounded the corner he finally got a good view of the bed. AJ was laying there, clutching Howie's pillow as he let out deep, gut-wrenching sobs. His shoulders were shaking with the force of his crying, and Howie was immediately petrified. What the hell had happened?
Howie had no idea, but he pushed his questions aside as he quietly slipped into the room and moved over to the bed. He could ask all the questions he wanted later... but right now AJ was more important.
Howie climbed onto the bed and stretched himself out so that their bodies were fully together, and he could wrap his arms around AJ and hold him close, as if protecting him with his own body.
AJ jumped as he felt the arms wrap around him. He had been so lost in his own emotions that he hadn't even heard anybody come in. He had managed to hold the tears in long enough to hear Brian leave before the floodgates had opened. He couldn't remember the last time he had broken down like this- not even when he had gone to rehab. At least then, there had been a glimmer of hope at the end of the dark that had surrounded him. But after Brian had left, it seemed he had taken that hope with him. The hope that everything would be okay. The hope that no matter what his four brothers would always be there, supporting him and loving him...
It was then that he had felt those arms wrap around him and heard the soft, soothing words whispered in his ear. Howie. Howie loved him, he trusted him. Didn't he?
Suddenly AJ wasn't so sure anymore, and he tried to pull away. Howie felt him move, and tightened his grip. He knew instinctively that he couldn't let him go. Instead Howie rolled AJ onto on to his back so that he could see his face. When he got a good look of AJ's blotchy, tearstained face, Howie was worried. AJ opened his eyes. Then Howie was scared. He knew that look. He hadn't seen it in a long time, and he had hoped that he would never see it again.
AJ's brown eyes were dull, brimming with tears that he wasn't even trying to hold back. But it was the pain that Howie could see in those eyes that scared him. It was so powerful, so raw, that Howie could almost feel it. Whatever had happened, it seemed to have thrown AJ back into the place he had been lost in all those months before, somewhere that Howie and the others had not been able to reach.
But then, that was before. Things were different now, because before Howie had never been able to do this...