Hey all you freaks out there! This is Hot Carl back for a second time to fill ya in on my wants, needs, and pet-peevs. Sorry about my absence from civilization for awhile there, I was living my life. First on the agenda, I would like to inform a couple friends of mine (Amanda & Teirre) that I am never again going to do the fag impression, or as I like to call it, "The Hobson".

Next, if I haven't told you or if you haven't heard it on the street for some unexplainable reason, on March 14th I passed my driving test, I'm getting my license back! I know...you can't contain yourself can you? The excitement overwhelmed me also. I'll be on the streets and getting more tickets quicker than you can say "Hey dick, you talkin' shit?".

From now on in my columns I'm going to have a "Song of the Week", It's going to be a song that I believe is worthy enough to be listened to over and over until you can't take it anymore, and then you won't have to listen to it anymore because I'll have a new one every week (hence the phrase, Song of the Week). This week's song would have to be Darren Hayes "Insatiable". I like this song simply because it's not your everyday "#1 on TRL" kind of song, but it's one of those songs that can be if it wanted to.

Got Beef? I do!

Why is it that girls always chose guys that think that they're going to treat them right but always end up hurting them in the end? Is it just something that girls don't have that impares them from making good judgments? Now I'm not intentionally trying to put girls down by saying that they don't make good judgments, they do make many good one's, but when it comes to guys...most girls are blind to the fact that guys are pigs and that they're going to hurt them. But...there is hope...I have a solution to your problem ladies, go out with me!

Now there's a column on Dawg's web page that is entitled "This One's A Catch". It's a column that he wrote that goes over a list of catch phrases that he and his friends use on a regular basis. I've may have even dropped one in on this column. And like he said, catch phrases have been used as long as anyone can remember. Well I have a few that I have used in the past, such as, "Whatever Dude", "Quick Nibbles, Chew Through My Ball Sack", and "Get It?". Well I have a new one that I would like to start. It's "I'm Effer-God-Damn-Vessant". I don't know how many of you have seen the movie "Roxanne", but that's where I got it from. Example: Two guys are talking about this girl and one of the guys is kind of nervous about asking her out so the other guy says "Just be charismatic" and the first guy says "Yeah, charismatic, I could be effer-god-damn-vessant!".

So anyway, It's been great talking to you people, but I have to go before my prostate gets inflamed...get it?