Who the fakk are you? I hear you cry. Well, I'll tell you. Let me just finish this sentence first. Right. Well, I'm a film student by day, and erm, night as well, I suppose. I'm on a one way ticket to Directorsville and there's no return ticket! Yesiree, it took me a long time to realise what I wanted from life and I decided that square eyes was the answer.
I'm from Shepherds Bush (haw haw) in London, and if you're not familiar with it, don't worry, I don't expect you to be - it's not a place people really stop to visit. It's more of a 'drive past quickly with the doors tightly locked' sort of place. But it's home, and no matter how much you hate it, you just can't bear for other people to diss your home. You grow to love odd things about Shepherds Bush. like the grafitti on the music college wall that reads 'SID I WARNED YOU'. Was it a Vicious reference? If so, who wrote it? What were they warning him about? The mind boggles. Another interesting feature was a pair of jeans lodged on an abandoned petrol station roof on Goldhawk Road. They were there for over a year, day and night. It warmed my heart to see them - you could always count on the jeans! But then the petrol station turned into one of those Christmas Tree sellers and the jeans disappeared forever. I mourned them for a minute or two, then facked off home. Shepherds Bush is also crawlling with Australians who like coming to London so they can set up establishments called 'Jumbucks' or 'Wobwanger' or 'Bumbaroo', and go to the Walkabout instead of seeing real London. I think they all go to Shepherds Bush because they see the word 'bush' in the name and get a bit confused. South Africans are worse - they all come here and nick all our Australians' jobs.
My university of choice is Royal Holloway, which, contrary to popular opinion, isn't a womans' prison in North London. It's in Egham (aka Smegham), a matchbox pisser of a town if ever there was one, and other than hang around outside Tesker's or ride shopping trolleys (fine steeds), there isn't that much to do, unless you hitch a ride to Staines (by name and by nature)., Our university has a nice posh building that was used in that cracker of a film I'm sure, Basic Instinct 2, as a mental home. Now if that isn't a claim to fame then I don't know what is. |
