These Character Bios were written by Victor Ferreira and Anthony Pereira in a hurried rush and with very little concern for accuracy or insight. If you would like to know more about any of the characters, contact the writer at [email protected]

Name: Alex

Age: 27

Occupation: Assistant Mail Handler at BoxCo.

Hobby: Finding errors in movie credits.

Favourite Quote: "Why Bother?"

Name: Kristin

Age: 23

Occupation: Student

Hobby: Chewing Gum and solving world political crises.

Favourite Quote: "What must umbrellas think of the world, everytime they go outside it's raining"

Name: Rick

Age: Unknown

Occupation: Unemployed/ Hobo

Hobby: Frightening Children/ Playing Guitar.

Favourite Quote: "When life gives you lemons, shut up and eat your lemons!"

Name: Marcy

Age: 31

Occupation: High Powered Attorney/ typist

Hobby: Pointing out painful imperfections in other people's personalities

Favourite Quote: "Get outta my way!"

Name: Writer

Age: 35

Occupation: Playwright

Hobby: Admiring his own greatness

Favourite Quote: "I'm the best me I can be"

Name: Dora

Age: 67

Occupation: Yoga Instructor

Hobby: Befriending Strangers

Favourite Quote: "Try the Ultramatic bed, you won't believe how good it is!"

Name: Crissy La Rue

Age: 21

Occupation: Lounge Singer

Hobby: Kareoke

Favourite Quote: "Whatever!"

Name: Joe

Age: none

Occupation: none

Hobby: none

Favourite Quote: none

Name: Narrator

Age: 33

Occupation: Narrating Plays

Hobby: Quilting

Favourite Quote: "Yo Quiero Taco Bell!"

Name: Secretary

Age: 29

Occupation: The Writer's Secretary

Hobby: Admiring the Writer

Favourite Quote: "How can I help you sir?"

Name: Stage Manager

Age: 26

Occupation: Stage Manager

Hobby: Organizing Bake Sales

Favourite Quote: "Roar! I'm the Stage Manager! I will eat your heart!"