Dimitri at the movies

Jane: So what movie are we going to watch, sweetie?

Dimitri: What about Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon? It looks pretty good in the
commercials.

Jane: Is Vanessa in the movie? Because if she is, I don't want to watch it.

Dimitri: I don't think so. 2 tickets for Crouching Tiger, please.

Jane: The movie is about to begin, we're just in time.

Dimitri: Shit, you mean I have to read the text throughout the movie? They
didn't mention that during the commercials!

Jane: This does pose a problem since my eyesight is leaving me.

Dimitri: When I watch a movie, I don't want to have to work for it! What
happens if I can't read fast enough?

2 minutes later.

Dimitri: Where's the action at? Freakin false advertising! Forget this. I'm
outta here. I wasted 2 minutes of my life that I will never be able to
relive again! I could've used that time to post a couple extra trolls! Hey,
maybe if I stay up 2 minutes longer before bedtime, I could make it up.