Ghosts From Her Past
© 2000 Wren
She pressed "replay" to listen to the phone message again.
"Hi, Cordy. It's Aura. Guess who I ran into when I was on vacation in Europe? Yes. Your parents. Isn't that great??!! They asked about you and said they may be coming back briefly to visit you soon. Call me!! Bye!!" <Wow, they asked about me. Their only daughter. How generous, she thought sarcastically. They fled to Europe to escape the IRS and are probably living the good life. While I am barely making it. A lot they care. Haven't even heard from them in a year. And Aura. She has called; but never actually visited me. Like Sunnydale is so far from LA. If she visited; she'd be horrified that Queen C is a secretary instead of a superstar.>
She wandered into the kitchen and started to make the one thing she could make without burning- canned chicken & stars soup. It also happened to be pretty much all she could afford. Oh, sure, she had a job. An interesting, fun, worthwhile job as Angel's secretary/assistant/seer. She loved it; except the icky demon gooey parts; because she was helping Angel to rid the world of evil and help the helpless. But the pay was lousy because they seldom had actual paying clients. Angel must have some big money stash somewhere, she thought, to be able to keep the business going and pay her & Wesley to work for him. It wasn't a lot; but he paid her all that he could. . "Helping the helpless" wasn't exactly a get rich quick occupation. Or get rich ever. And he often "lent" her money that he never expected to see repaid and always made sure she ate; often cooking for her at his place. At least she made enough to afford this great apartment. Well, it was great now that Angel & dear Doyle had driven out her old lady ghost. Now, it was just her & phantom Dennis.
And her aspiring career as an actress was still aspiring. If Wesley and Angel's opinions of her acting were accurate; it would be aspiring forever. She always auditioned; but seldom got parts. Angel was supportive of her acting career and always gave her time off for auditions; but she knew he never actually expected her to get any parts. He said once that he was afraid of losing her to Hollywood.
But she was Angel's seer & thus connected to him forever by the Powers that Be. And she knew Angel cared about her as a little sister or cherished friend. She valued his friendship; but somehow it wasn't enough anymore. She wanted more. But, of course, she wouldn't get it.
Cordelia Chase never got what she wanted lately. Her clothes were bought from the "rack" and were usually store labels; not designer labels. She had even fallen so low she was buying outfits at consignment shops. Her new shoes were from Payless; not Neimann's.
She ate her soup quickly and started to shower and get ready to go into the office of Angel Investigations. The heat of the water soothed her and she tried to bring herself out of her depresed mood. At least, she thought, as she lathered up with her discount store brand shampoo; no one from my past knows how low I have sunk now.
Angel watched Cordelia from across the room while pretending to read a book. He wondered what was wrong with her. She had arrived on time but looking a little harried; wearing jeans and an old halter top and very little makeup. That's odd, he thought, because Cordelia usually takes such care never to come to work ( or go anywhere in public) without her makeup perfectly applied. Her beautiful brunette hair was pulled back into a simple ponytail. And her clothes; while clean and pretty; were not her usual style. And she had turned down her usual sugar-glazed doughnut she had EVERY morning. She seemed very distracted and her morning greeting and smile seemed forced.Something was definitely wrong; and Angel was worried. He wanted to approach her and ask what was wrong; but he knew she wouldn't tell him. They had become very close when he had been sharing her apartment and he knew that she could be so stubborn that way. She wouldn't tell him until she was good and ready.
Right now, she was staring intently at whatever she had on the computer screen. She was concentrating so deeply on the screen that she startled and jumped when the phone rang. " Angel Investigations. We help the hopeless," she answered it in her usual bright,cheerful voice that Angel was sure did not match her current mood. " Oh, one moment please." Angel, figuring the call was for him; reached out to take the receiver. He was a little shocked to hear her say into the phone, now in a cultured, richly toned voice, " Yes, this is Cordelia Chase. My secretary told me you wanted to talk to me. She listened for a moment; then replied, " Thank- you so much for calling," and hung up.
Angel was puzzled. She seemed to want the caller to believe that she HAD a secretary instead of being the secretary. He looked at her questioningly.
" Oh, that was just my agent. I told him that I was an associate here; not a secretary. Makes me sound more mysterious for Hollywood." She was looking at the floor while she explained and her eyes were welling with tears. She was working hard not to cry. She made fleeting eye contact with Angel and saw his expression was one of disbelief. " He, uh, was reminding me that I have to go to an audition. I, uh, forgot."
Angel looked at her in surprise and a little bit of hurt. He thought they were family. He knew she was lying to him. Why would a phone call from her agent make her cry? He knew her quest for " international superstardom" was falling far short of her desires; but she had seemed basically happy just yesterday.
"I, uh, have to go, " she stammered as she grabbed her purse and tried to slide past Angel to get to the door of the office.
He put his hand on her arm and gently turned her around. "Cordelia, what's wrong?", he asked. " What's going on?" She wanted to melt into his arms and tell him and have him make it all ok; like he always did. Except that this wasn't something Angel could fix.She hated lying to him and knew she was hurting him by not telling; but this was not something Angel would understand. So she looked him not-quite- in -the -eye and put on a huge, if totally artificial smile.
"Nothing's wrong, Angel. Just that I am already late for this audition and I really need the part." Her eyes looked at his now, almost pleadingly, " I really have to go."
She pulled away and Angel let her go. He sighed. Something was definitely wrong. They had grown so close in recent months since she had had her vision coma and he had lived with her. She had opened up and told him everything. He thought that she knew he loved her and would always be there for her. The fact that she wouldn't tell him what was wrong now worried him even more. Something was happening that was upsetting her and she didn't want him to know what it was. She wouldn't let him protect her from it. He scowled at that thought, grabbed his coat, and headed for his apartment and the entrance to the tunnels. He was going to find out what was going on.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cordelia nearly ran out of the office and to her car; no longer able to hold back the torrent of tears. She didn't have much time and she had so much to do. Her first stop was the bank- she definitely would need money. She really didn't have any extra.
The three hundred she took out now would really make her short on next month's rent. But she would worry about that then. Isn't that what starving actresses did? Lived day to day? And she was just a starving actress; waiting for the big break; nothing more.
She stopped at the store and then went home. She opened the door and threw her purchases inside. There was so much to do and not much time. The apartment seemed so quiet that it made her thoughts seem so loud in her head. She turned on the stereo to a popular music station to drown out the sound of her thoughts. She wasn't even sure where to start. She grabbed the yellow pages and quickly flicked through them. Several minutes and four phone calls later; she had made a lot of arrangements. It would cost her most of her saved money; and that worried her. But she didn't really have a choice.
She had to pull this off; make it work. She didn't know why; but suddenly this was the most important thing to her. Then, she was overwhelmed by all the frustration of her struggle to survive over the past year and how far behind this situation would put her. By all the humiliation and rejection she had suffered and kept bottled up inside her. She fell onto her bed and started to cry loudly and hysterically into the pillows; her sobs almost in rhythm with the beat of the music.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Angel emerged from the sewers outside Cordelia's apartment. He gave an ironic smile at seeing her car parked at the curb. The feeling of relief that he had guessed her destination correctly was mixed with hurt that she really had lied to him. Something was going on and he was determined to find out what. Now. He strode determinedly to her door; taken aback by the loud music emanating from the apartment. He knocked loudly on the door.
"Cordelia!" All he heard was the pounding music; wincing because the music hurt his enhanced vampiric hearing. " Cordelia, its Angel," he pounded on the door harder. He wasn't sure if she was ignoring him at the door or if she didn't hear him over the blaring noise. The loud music wasn't like her either. Then he caught the sounds of crying, faint over the deafening noise. She was crying hysterically. She needed him.
Almost before he realized it; he had broken the lock on the door and forced it open. He rushed into the apartment and hastily ripped the stereo plug out of the wall; stopping the maddening noise. The only sound left was the heart-wrenching sound of Cordelia's hysterical crying. He ran into the bedroom and saw her sprawled, fully clothed, on the bed;next to the phone book; sobbing hysterically into the pillow. She was so far gone she didn't seem to notice that the music had stopped.
Oh, God. What was wrong that had her this upset? He ran to her and pulled her into his arms; hugging her tightly to his chest. She didn't even seem to notice; just buried her face into his chest; wetting his silk shirt with her tears. He rocked her gently for a few minutes; stroking her hair and murmuring words of comfort; trying to get her to calm down. After a few minutes when she was clutching him and still sobbing hysterically, he pulled her face out of his shoulder and gently brushed the wisps of hair from her face.
"Cordelia," he looked into her eyes and whispered insistently to her, "what's wrong? It's ok. I'll fix it. Just tell me what's wrong!"
Angel continued to hold Cordelia; rocking her while she cried hysterically into his shirt.
"Please, Delia, tell me what's wrong!" She continued to sob and clutch his shirt as she spoke.
"They're <hitch> " com. . .ing" .. . she wailed into his chest.
"Who? Who's coming? Demons? Tell me who is coming." Angel pleaded, looking into her eyes, shaking her gently,
"They. Are. Com. ing. Tomorrow. And I can't let them see...,"she wailed into his shirt.
"WHO?", Angel almost yelled at her; worried and frustrated now.
"My. parents. And I can't stop them!!", she cried into his shirt.
If Angel breathed; he would've heaved a sigh of relief. Cordelia's parents may be menacing; but they were at least demons of the human variety. He had never met them; but had heard their story.
They had lost a huge fortune to the IRS for non-payment of taxes. They fled the U.S. to Europe keeping a good portion of their wealth; leaving their eighteen-year old daughter to fend for herself, first in Sunnydale; then on the mean streets of LA..
Given her recent history with her parents, Cordelia's reaction to their pending visit didn't seem unusual. To the shaking, sobbing girl in his arms; their arrival was a major crisis. The arrival of her parents had obviously triggered some very powerful feelings in her. .
He thought back to his relationship with his own father. They had not gotten along; but then, Angel pre-vampire had been a drunken layabout who could never live up to his father's too-high expectations. He had visited his father right after he had been changed and taken great satisfaction in drinking him dry. It wasn't until years later that Angel realized that his father's disapproval affected him for eternity. But Cordelia was not a drunken layabout, She had a job and worked hard. She had grown so much and was so giving . And she was beautiful. Surely, her parents would be proud of her.
By now, Cordelia was quieting and sniffling softly. "What am I going to do?," she looked at him with those huge brown tear-filled eyes; making his still heart break. "I can't let them see. What I am doing. What am I going to do?, she whispered desperately to him.
She was pale & her face drawn. "You go wash your face. I'll go fix you something to eat. I know you haven't even eaten today. Then we'll figure it out", suggested Angel.
While Cordelia washed her face; Angel searched her kitchen. There was almost no food in any of the cupboards. Just some yogurt and cottage cheese in the fridge and some diet soda. He frowned to find very little food anywhere. <What has she been eating?, he thought worriedly. And how long since she had a good meal? Probably since I moved out. >He reached for the phone and called the Chinese takeout place down the street and ordered a ton of food to be delivered. She returned from the bathroom and he looked at her sternly; indicating the empty cupboards. < He'd be really mad if he knew I spent half of next month's rent on getting ready for my parents, she thought.>
"I, uh, haven't had time to shop.," she said quickly. His look indicated he didn't believe her.
"Ok, so I was a little short this month. Had to order new 8x10s and pay my manager." Only Cordelia would prioritize photos before food; Angel thought. Her so far unsuccessful acting career was that important to her. He got her one of the Diet Cokes.
"Ok, I ordered you some food. Now, tell me what is going on."
Cordelia was still sniffeling. " It's nothing , really, I just overreacted." She tried to make light of it, putting on a beautiful, huge, but fake smile. "Remember my old friend from Sunnydale, Aura? Well, she hasn't really been in touch too much. But she called yesterday and said she ran into my parents on a trip to Europe. They asked about me and told her they were coming to visit me. I haven't seen them since they left Sunnydale in my senior year. The phone call this morning was from Mom's personal assistant telling me they are coming tomorrow. And they can`t see me like this!!" As she finished, she dissolved into tears once again.
Angel was surprised to see her so emotional; as his Cordelia was always so seemingly confident and strong. But he knew that under her veneer of confidence and sarcasm; was a sweet, vulnerable young girl. As Angel rocked her gently and murmured words of comfort; he was taken aback by the fragile strength of the girl in his arms. She was forced to become independent at an early age and survived the evils of LA all alone. Even since working for Angel; she had adjusted to her near-poverty lifestyle with grace and determination. She had never even asked Angel for money; and tried to refuse it when he offered it. Only if disaster hit and she was totally without funds would she even accept an advance on her salary. She was so determined to survive on her own. He was immensely proud of her strength and determination. But he was afraid her parents would only judge her by her current net worth. And that was almost zero.
She had grown so much in the months since he had found her at a fashionable party in LA and hired her as his assistant. She was almost a totally different, better person than she had been in Sunnydale; and since her parents had last seen her. He loved Cordelia for the person she was now for being the shining light in his life. The reason for him being still "alive." But her parents would be expecting the Cordelia of the past. And he knew that despite her proud veneer, independence, and seeming self confidence; their approval was important to her. "They don't know that I am just a secretary. And that I am just an unemployed actress. They think I am important," she mumbled, eyes filling with tears again.
Angel cringed at that. Didn't she know how important she was to him? Even after all they had been through together? She was important to him and to the cause of fighting evil. She was his love; his friend; his seer; his secretary. He vowed to himself to make sure he showed her how important she was. He gripped her hand tightly as he listened to her stilted words.
"They will see what a failure I am. So I can't let them see how I live."
Angel started to brush her tears away . "Don't cry anymore. You'll make yourself sick. It'll be ok. I promise."
But even as he said that, he felt despair. He loved her deeply; even if he couldn't show it physically; and he wanted to protect her from the evil things in the world that might hurt her. The doorbell rang, announcing the arrival of the food. Angel went to answer it; carefully avoiding the sunlight that filtered in through the gap in the curtains. He worried that this situation with her parents was one thing he couldn't protect her from. He growled as he realized he might have to stand by and watch his Delia get hurt. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The older couple exited the First Class section of the airplane and went into the gate area of LAX. There, they were met by a young, dark haired, handsome man in an expensive business suit. He was holding a sign that read "Richard & Helen Chase" in his one hand. The other sleeve of his business suit sported a state-of- the -art prosthetic hand.
"Look, dear, there is the man our attorneys told us to meet." Helen Chase followed her husband across the waiting area to greet the man. The man drew them aside to a nearby gateside pub; nearly deserted despite it being mid-afternoon.
"Welcome back to the States," the man greeted Richard; pumping his hand vigorously. "I am Lindsey McDonald from Wolfram & Hart, Attorneys at Law. Our firm was contacted by your French attorney and told to take good care of you. We can shelter you from any claims the US government may try to make on your remaining assets. In exchange, we will require your cooperation in helping to procure a certain individual that we have been pursuing. Come with me and we will discuss the details. They followed him to a chauffer- driven limousine and sped away to the offices of Wolfram & Hart.
Richard and Helen Chase sat in the luxuriously appointed, corner office of Lindsey McDonald, the handsome attorney from Wolfram & Hart. Richard looked out through the floor to ceiling window at the view of LA. He was tired; having just stepped off a plane from Paris and being whisked away by an attorney he barely knew. At least the office was comfortable , the liquor premium, and the cigars Cuban. He hated cheap liquor. His wife was smoking one of the delicate slim cigarettes she smoked because they made her feel more affluent.
"When can my wife and I get to our hotel, Mr. McDonald? We are tired and want to make ourselves presentable before we visit our daughter. She will expect us to look ,well, presentable. . ." He scoffed at the slight wrinkles in his Armani suit.
Lindsay thought that the couple looked very presentable in their designer suits. Obviously the bit of trouble they'd had with the IRS here in the States was not affecting their lifestyle in France. This couple looked wealthy to the gills. Then Lindsay thought of their daughter, the beautiful, yet poor, Cordelia Chase.
"Well, you are free to leave at any time. But remember that the US government still has claim to your remaining possessions and income. We can provide, er, incentives to the government to look the other way while you are in the US. In return, we would like your help. It involves your daughter."
"Cordelia?? What could she have to do with you? She is a successful actress . She is very beautiful and a talented actress, you know. Right now she is undercover working as a secretary to research for a movie she is doing."
Lindsey blanched. Helen Chase had obviously been fed some misconceptions regarding Cordelia's station in life. He wondered who had told them that. He knew Cordelia really was just a secretary and not an actress. He grinned as he thought of how angry the Chases would be when they found out the truth. For now, he decided to go along with it.
"Yes, well, she is "pretending" to be a secretary in the office of Angel Investigations. The owner, Angel had some misunderstandings with us in the past and refuses to do business with us. He has become good friends with your daughter. She has some powerful gifts that would, er, benefit our company; but she refuses to do business with us. We would like you to "encourage" her to spend time with Michael, one of our associates. Maybe date him. He is handsome and very wealthy. Certainly worthy of your daughter's station in life. We feel that if she associates herself with us; then Angel will, too. And his business is very important to our firm. Are you willing to help?"
As Richard contemplated this; Lindsay squirmed. The story he gave them was as full of bull as Cordelia's acting career. But he knew that Angel cherished Cordelia, If he could lure her to the firm unwittingly via Michael; Angel would come after her. He would do anything for her. And that willingness would lead Angel & Cordelia to their downfall.
"Ok, seems harmless enough. We would like to meet this Michael ourselves. And if he is as rich as you say; he would be perfect for our Cordy. As long as she won't get hurt."
"Oh, don't worry. She is a precious commodity to our firm. We would never hurt her," Lindsay lied, with an evil-looking gleam in his eye.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cordelia wandered longingly around the large hotel suite. One night in it had cost her almost all of next month's rent on her real apartment; but it was beautiful. Floor to ceiling picture window overlooked the Malibu hills. It definitely looked to be a place where an up- and- coming, successful young actress would live. <Where I would live if I could just get a good gig>, she thought. She sighed. She had to convince her parents that she lived here and that she was a successful actress.
"You rented this place? It must've cost you a fortune. Where are you getting the money?" Angel asked, coming up behind her.
"Geez! Could you not sneak up on people like that? You are going to give me a heart attack at 20!." She figured if she complained, Angel would tune her out and drop the subject of money. No such luck.
"I can't believe you rented this. Do you really think that having your parents here for one night is going to convince them that you live here?", he commented.
"Well, I couldn't afford to rent it for longer than one night. I'll have my parents over here and then they'll think I live here. Why can't you just go along with it and not give me a lecture . You wouldn't understand anyway." She tried to breeze past him to check out the bedrooms of the suite.
He grabbed her hands and held them; stilling her movements. "Delia, your parents will never believe after only one evening that you live here. They won't believe that you are still rich at all. Look at the car you drive." He looked into her eyes as he spoke but she didn't meet his gaze.
"Oh, I took care of that too. I rented a limo for tonight. I'll use it to pick them up at the hotel and bring them here. The only time it might get a little dicey is in the office and then we'll work it out. Just don't give it away to them please! "
Angel sighed. She was pulling out all the stops to impress her parents and make them think she was something she wasn't. He knew it was important to impress her parents; but she was really going to an extreme. She wouldn't be able to afford next month's rent on her REAL apartment or even food because she was spending all on a charade. There was nothing to be ashamed of in being a secretary. He wanted to grab her and shake some sense into her. He tried reason again.
"Delia, you are beautiful, smart, independent and a survivor. Why can't you just let your parents see you for who you really are? You survived when they skipped town and left you alone. They abandoned their only daughter when the going got rough to save themselves. Their opinion of you should not matter this much. So, tell me why are you going to all this trouble to impress them?" To his surprise her face crumpled in front of his eyes. She blinked furiously to keep the tears away; but lost the battle and the tears overcame her. Angel went to her to try to hold her; but she pulled away and turned her back to him; totally closed off. The only sounds he heard were the heavy, accelerated thudding of her broken heart mixed in with her muffled sobs. Her head was bowed and held in her hands wetness from her tears soaking her sleeves.. Finally, she spoke in a muffled voice, broken occasionally by a sob.
"My parents desperately wanted a boy to carry on the Chase heritage and name. My father was so disappointed when I turned out to be a girl. But he decided that he would teach me the business side of the family anyway. So that we could stay the ones with the power. After all, he thinks rich people work hard and deserve to keep their station in life. Well, as you have found out, business and market shares, or even filing are not my forte." At this, she turned her head just enough to look over her shoulder at him and offered him a sad little smile. "Daddy soon discovered that his girl had no interest in these things; so he decided to invest in his little girl so I would be able to wield the kind of power that a rich, classy woman can have. From the time I was 6, I was groomed to be a beautiful, classy snob who could get by on my beauty. I entered & won pagents & my parents spent lots of money on designer clothes; shoes, makeup. and etiquette lessons. My friends all played outside while I was learning to fix my hair and put on makeup. At first, it bugged me that my friends got to do stuff while I went to dance lessons. But after a while; I grew to like it. Of course, I had to keep my grades up. Wouldn't do to have a Chase go to a state college instead of an expensive private one.
"By the time I got to high school, -well- you know how I was. Haughty, snotty, and beautiful. Loved by the "in " crowd and hated by Buffy & her crowd. I knew there were about 60 people in the " We Hate Cordelia" club. I know you hated me too." She stopped Angel's attempt at denial with a wave of her hand. "I was the biggest bitch in Sunnydale, with the best clothes, the best car, and the best boyfriends. My parents said I was beautiful and could make a fortune off my looks. Add a degree from a prestigious college and this Chase would be unstoppable. Then, the IRS discovered Daddie's little bookkeeping omissions and it all ended. Just when i was starting to fit in and be accepted by Buffy 's group, it all ended. The house was gone, the clothes, everything."
Angel listened with rapt attention. Cordelia had never shared so much of herself with him before. He had thought she was a bitch in high school- sometimes she still was. But it was a part of her he accepted. "I spent the end of senior year living in a dingy apartment by myself after my parents scooted to Europe. All the others were talking about college. Did you know I got accepted into 5 good universities and couldn't go because I didn't have the money? Not that I am the college type. But I had to get a job in the dress store just to buy my dress for the prom on layaway. How pathetic is that?"
"So I come to LA hoping to make a living doing the only thing I was ever good at- looking good- and find that I don't even do that well enough. And now my parents will see that not only can't I excell in business or college. I am a failure at the one thing I ever had going for me- capitalizing on my looks. No one in Hollywood wants me. I guess the beautiful, charming Cordelia Chase isn't charming enough. Daddy won't get his return on his investment. His little girl isn`t successful at anything."
Cordelia sagged to her knees on the lush carpet and sobbed loudly, her body shaking violently. Angel went to her, tears in his own eyes, and scooped her up; sitting with her on his lap on the couch. He just let her cry herself out, knowing talking to her would do no good until she had gotten rid of the powerful emotions. As he sat with her pressed tightly against him, whispering words of comfort and stroking her soothingly, he felt the fury of his inner demon rise. He had never met Cordelia's parents; but he already hated them. He wanted to rip them apart for the pain they had caused their sweet, beautiful daughter. And the pain they would still cause when they inevitably found out the truth.
Oh, yes, he really wanted to meet them.
The new office of Angel Investigations was on the bottom two floors in an old office building. The space had been purchased; not rented , for Angel & Co. by David Nabbitt. The new office had Angel's living quarters below and an old; yet charmingly authentic office above. Angel was downstairs in his new favorite chair reading and thinking about Cordelia. She had stepped out quickly before getting ready to meet her parents to mail her new headshots to agents all over LA. She continued to be so hopeful that if she could just get seen by the RIGHT agent for the RIGHT project; she would become a superstar. She wanted it so badly and Angel wanted it so badly for her. But part of him didn't. He knew if Hollywood called; she would be off in a flash; seer or no. He wanted so badly to grab her tightly and never let her go; never let her out of his sight.
Angel was just finishing up some paperwork when he felt an unfamiliar presence and heard unfamiliar voices upstairs. He raced up to greet what he thought might be new clients. " Is this the office of Angel Investigations?"
Angel was taken aback by the beautiful woman in her mid-forties in the striking red suit with the brunette hair. One look at her and he knew that the couple must be Cordelia's parents. He could see where his Delia got her looks. Her mother was striking; he had to admit. But then he wanted to strike HER as he remembered all Delia had told him. He mastered the impulse and shook hands with the tall, handsome man in his late forties standing next to the woman.
"Yes" he said. "I'm Angel."
"Yes, Angel. Fine. We are looking for Cordelia Chase. She is working here, I believe as an, er, office associate," the man seemed to bristle even as he said the words.
"Yes, she is working as a secretary here. She is running some errands but she should come back soon. Would you like some coffee?," Angel offered politely.
While he was fixing the coffee Angel heard the woman speaking to the man. "Richard! She is doing errands! Isn't that above and beyond the call of an actress on assignment? It's so menial. Next thing you know she'll be making the coffee!" Helen Chase whispered loudly. Angel smirked as he overheard the comments. Cordelia already made the coffee here. And she was abysmal at it. But that wasn't the point, dammit! They were making fun of all Delia did behind her back. The urge to beat them to death grew. He had hated them before he even met them and even more so now. He wanted to let himself at least vamp out to scare the hell out of them them; but he knew it would hurt and embarrass Cordelia; so he resisted the urge.
His mood brightened when he smelled her familiar scent just a second before he heard her,
"Angel, I'm back. Would it kill you to. . .?" She stopped dead in her tracks and her beautiful smile faltered slightly when she saw her parents. She looked back and forth between them & Angel. Then , her beautiful, if forced smile was back again. "Mom, Dad, It's great to see you. How are you? What are you doing here? I was going to .er. pick you up at the hotel." Angel watched as Cordelia's parents embraced her stiffly; her mother giving one of those air kisses at her cheek.
"Darling, we thought we'd surprise you! And, is THAT what you wear to be a secretary? It looks like it came off the rack!" She curled a lip in distain at the cute jeans and top outfit that Delia was wearing. Angel winced. He thought she looked cute in it. Delia's face faltered; but then she caught herself.
"Well, you know, when you play the part, you have to dress the part. Secretaries don't wear designer clothes. Have you met Angel? He owns the business."
Helen Chase smiled suggestively at Angel. "Oh, we've met. He is very handsome. Is he the P.I. then?" she walked to Angel and blatantly ran her hand down his cheek. "He is a handsome one. But, only a P.I., too bad? He has such potential." Angel tensed and stood completely still as she touched him. He couldn't believe she was flirting with him in front of her husband and daughter. He refused to let himself move; knowing that if he did, he would be unable to control his actions. Inside, his demon was growling. < That haughty bitch. She would lose some of her confidence; not to mention all her blood; if you'd just let me do her. And HOW DARE she criticize his property.> He could hear Angelus's musings inside him.
"Well, dear, we should get to the hotel to get presentable. Can't wait to catch up. We can't wait to see your place. You'll have to tell us all the shows and movies you've been in so we can see them. Damn French system- can't get a lot of American movies there. Excellent caviar, though."
"Uh, ok." said Delia desperately. "I'll pick you up at the hotel and we'll do dinner. Then, to my new place." Her smile was wavering and Angel thought she might start to cry. He wanted to go to her; but wasn't sure she would let him.
"Angel can come with us, too. He is a good friend." She managed to hold her smile until her parents left. Then she seemed to crumble onto the floor. Angel held her as she cried, " What am I going to tell them? What will I do?" Angel held her while Angelus growled within him. He knew what he'd do if this couple didn't stop hurting his Delia. Angel just hoped he'd be able to control his inner demon if Angelus got too angry.
The table at Foncesca's was littered with half empty champagne glasses and half eaten plates of fine Italian cuisine. Two of the plates were nearly untouched. Angel had actually eaten a few bites of his veal piccatta in order to keep up appearances. He was afraid the elder Chases might wonder that a man his size had no appetite. He looked across the table at Cordelia's glittering eyes. She also seemed to be appraising him in his dark blue suit. She had not even touched her food, either. It bothered him that she was so upset she lost her appetite. He noticed that her face was pale and her smile strained. She looked incredibly beautiful in the plum colored silk spaghetti strap dress that he knew she spent a fortune she couldn't afford on. He wanted to grab her and kiss her right there; but he couldn't. Cordelia was making small talk with her parents about the careers of various Hollwood celebrities. It was obvious to Angel that she was desperate to steer the conversation any way- except to the topic of her own life. He listened absently while he contemplated the situation.
Angel was glad that Cordelia insisted that he come to "cushion" her from her parents. He didn't tell Cordy, but he wanted to come. Especially when he heard that the Chases had invited some lawyer to come to be introduced to Cordelia. Cordelia's parents were worse than he had expected. Helen had already chastized Cordelia for doing menial errands, buying off the rack, and for getting too close to the "small time detective." And if she mentioned once more how Cordelia's dress was from last season; he was going to jump the table and smack her and convention be damned. He was having a hard time keeping his temper around the snobby couple.
Angel hated that the Chases had invited that cheesy lawyer, Michael, to dinner and had seated him right next to Cordelia. He had seated himself right across from Delia so he could keep an eye on sleaze bag Michael. He could see Michaeal's hand start to stray down her leg and up her short skirt. And he saw Cordelia try to repeatedly and subtly shove Michael's hand away. Under the table, he kicked Michael hard and then made eye contact; allowing his own to flicker yellow briefly. Micheal's eyes widened quickly and he looked away; quickly taking his hand off Cordelia's thigh.
Angel's attention returned to Helen's statement, "Cordelia, dear, you know that Michael is an entertainment lawyer. He would be excellent to help you organize your affairs now that you are becoming a successful actress." <Yeah,> thought Angel, <like he helped you organize yours. I'll bet the IRS loves him.> Cordelia gave him a "you behave" stare; maybe anticipating his thoughts. She was able to do that a lot and it still amazed him.
"I'll certainly keep him in mind, " she replied.
"Yes," Michael replied, "I can find some excellent tax shelters for you. My firm handles some of the wealthiest, most powerful people on both coasts." Angel couldn't control his anger anymore.
"That would be the always reputable Wolfram & Hart. You are all the same. Give Lindsay my regards. How is he, by the way? Lost any limbs lately?" Angel asked with an innocent expression on his face. The elder Chases and Cordelia looked at him in shock. Cordelia smirked quickly; then hid it.
Michael looked across the table. "Well, Angel, Lindsay sends his best. He said to tell you he'd be seeing you soon." Angel answered menacingly, "Tell him to leave my people alone. Or he may really see my bad side." An awkward silence pervaded the table.
Helen finally broke it. "Cordy, you need to fix your makeup. Come on. I'll fix you up. Excuse us, GENTLEMEN! We need to fix ourselves up." Angel though Cordelia looked perfect already; but watched the two women disappear into the Ladies Lounge.
"Cigar, Angel? Non-smoking areas are for others. I can smoke wherever I want to. Now, Angel, I understand that you have some issues with Wolfram & Hart because of some previous unpleasantness with them. Something about a scroll. I'm afraid I don't know all the details. But you shouldn't let one unfortunate incident ruin the future possibilities." Before Richard Chase had even finished, Angel's demon roared.
"That "unfortunate incident", as you call it, almost got your daughter, who also happens to be my very best friend, killed. I think that is reason enough to hate them. They are evil." He grabbed Michael's lapels and virtually pulled him across the table. He spoke in a low and menacing voice. "Keep. Your. Filthy. Evil. Hands. Off. of. Her. Otherwise, I will have to kill you. Understand?" He allowed his eyes to flicker yellow for a split second just to put more fear into Michael's hollow heart. He glared brazenly into Michael's eyes for several seconds before letting him down.
Angel felt angry and guilty. He wanted to rip out Michael's heart for even trying to touch his Delia. Part of him felt guilt at having ruined the dinner. Cordelia had really wanted this to go well; and him nearly vamping out and threatening to kill someone would be sure to put a damper on the evening. She would be really pissed at him when she found out. But, damn, that Michael deserved it for touching HIS Delia.
Angel was pulled from his reverie by Richard's voice. "Angel, we need to talk. You seem to have developed a great affection and possessiveness of my daughter in the short time she has been pretending to be your secretary. It is totally inappropriate. She is a very beautiful girl and on her way to International superstardom. You are just a P.I. and not really in the same class as our Cordy. She doesn't need to be tied up in your little P.I. helping people business. I don't want you to hold her back. She is young yet and hasn't been in many relationships with men. I have seen the way she looks at you. She seems infatuated with you. You have to discourage her from wanting you."
< Damn, not another "I want you to go away for the good of my child" talks. This time I am not going to be influenced by it. I take far better are of Cordelia than he ever did. > This time, his tenuous hold over his demon snapped. "Look, Mr. Chase, just shut the hell up about what is best for Cordelia. How would you even know? You never cared about what she has wanted. Just you. You treated her like she was worthless all her life. Then, you lost everything she ever knew for her and then abandoned her to save your own ass. Your own daughter had to live by herself in Sunnydale her senior year and came to LA almost penniless. Where where you then, Mr. Loving Father? You were living it up in France while your daughter was struggling. You weren't there to help her out. I WAS. So what the hell do you know about what is best for her? All you know is what is best for yourself. So don't EVER tell me what is right for Delia." Angel stopped; just noticing that his hands were gripping Richard's coat; pulling him up to eye level with Angel. Angry eyes locked with frightened ones. Angel realized that they were in public and reluctantly let Richard go. He really wanted to hurt Richard for hurting Cordelia.
And Michael for trying to touch her. Richard Chase sank down into his chair; still trembling from the anger and menace he had seen in Angel's eyes. Angel just sat in silence waiting for Delia to return so he could take her out of there. Parents or not; he wasn't going to let them get close enough to hurt her again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Angel looked at his watch for the third time. Something was wrong. Cordelia and her mother had been in the ladies room for almost 15 minutes. After this abysmal evening; Angel would not have blamed Cordelia if she climbed out the window to escape her parents and the oaf Michael. But she would never really do that. He knew she would at least bid her father goodnight before leaving. Richard Chase just sat across the silent table; trying to recover from Angel's humiliation of him. Michael was just staring off like the coward he was. The silence was awkward.
Angel looked at his watch again. 18 minutes. Something had to be wrong. Just as he was about to go knock on the door; Helen emerged alone. Where was Delia?? Maybe she really had made the great escape. But, no, he still felt her presence in the building. He could still hear the familiar rhythm of her heartbeat that he had committed to memory. He knew it so well he could even pick it out over the din of all the other heartbeats in the room.
Helen arrived back at the table. All her makeup seemed freshly applied and the overwhelming scent of her expensive perfume told Angel what she had spent all of her 18 minutes doing.
"Cordelia will be out shortly", she said before Angel could even open his mouth to ask. "She doesn't seem to be feeling well. She fell on the couch and started shaking all over and clutching her head and moaning. It was really very weird- looking. And not attractive. She really should see a doctor and get control of that. It will really drive men away. Anyway, I wanted to give her some of my migraine pills; but she didn't want any. Just took aspirin. She just wanted to fix her makeup up. She should be out any minute."
Angel was concerned. Delia had had a vision and he wasn't there to help her through the pain. She most likely had a case for him. He wondered how to get away tactfully. "I , uh, just remembered that I have to check in to the office about a case I am on." Angel left the table and went to stand in the corridor just outside the Ladies room. In a few minutes, the door opened and Cordelia walked out looking pale & shaky.
Angel embraced her tightly for a minute. "Are you ok?"
"You mean other than the mess of this evening?, Yes. But here is a new case for you." He took the gum wrapper that Delia had written the address on." It's a demon who's going to kill two women. You'd better hurry. It's across town." Angel was glad for a reason to leave. He knew Delia would be pissed at him when she heard about his conversation with her father. But he wanted to take her with him.
"Go Angel, now. Hurry. I'll be ok here. I'll just finish dessert and take my parents home in the cool car." She stood on tiptoe and kissed him softly on the lips. "Be careful!" she whispered softly as she kissed him again.
"You be careful, too, especially with that Michael. I'll call you tomorrow." As Angel rushed out of the restaurant, he worried about leaving his love alone with her own private demons.
Cordelia served her parents and Michael coffee in the living room of the suite. This part of the evening seemed to be going well. Her parents really liked the suite. It was much like the one they had in Europe.
"Cordelia, dear, why are you serving the coffee. Surely you have someone to do those things for you." Her mother's voice halted her contented thoughts and left her bristling.
"Well, it is late. She probably let the help go for the evening, " she was surprised when Michael came to her rescue. He looked at her with a sullen look in his eye. He knew all about the charade and was letting her know that he would continue with it. For a price. She wondered what his price might be.
She wished again that Angel was there. He always knew what to do. By now he probably would've vamped out; kicked them all out of the suite, and taken Cordelia home, her real home. Where she belonged. She missed Phantom Dennis. Well, Angel was supposed to come here with them but then she got the vision and he had to leave. She hoped he would be finished and home soon. She worried about him.
Her head still ached since the mammoth vision she had had at the restaurant. Her mother had been treating her like some kind of freak; questioning her endlessly about her little "fits" and how she should be rid of them because they were SOO unattractive. Men didn't like women who had fits, she kept saying. Not, oh, Cordy, are you ok? Just "that was weird looking."
"Cordelia, darling. I wanted to speak with you about this private investigator you are working with. Angel. It seems that he is becoming a bit attached to you. I think you are really encouraging his attentions. But he was a bit terse with us tonight. He caused a bit of a scene in the restaurant. I don't think a man like him is good for you. He seems a bit violent and uncouth. Might cause some bad publicity for an up and coming actress. How well do you know this man? He seems very proprietary of you." Cordelia was surprised her father said that all in one breath.
"Daddy," she said carefully, "Angel and I are good friends. We have worked together for a while now. He saves people who are in trouble an I help him. It is an important job." Her father puffed on his cigar. The thick smoke from it smelled bad and made her headache worse.
"Well, Cordy, you are quite the actress and so good at playing the devoted secretary; but I think you should stop the act now. You are not a secretary and you should not be hanging around a man who associates with the less desirables of the world. I think you should stop playing the secretary game. You would be a horrible secretary in reality. Now, lets stop talking about that Angel and discuss your plans for her, Michael."
It was really starting to bother her that her parents were such snobs. Couldn't they see that she was helping Angel to save souls? Ok, so she would rather do it WITHOUT the skull splitting visions; and nasty demon goo; but the PTB had entrusted her with a duty and she had to fulfill it. Did her parents really think she was so useless that she couldn't earn to type, file and answer the phone?
Geez; even a five year old can answer the phone; but my father thinks I am not any good at it? She suddenly started to feel the return of Cordelia the bitchiest girl in Sunnydale. She wanted to tell her parents off; but stopped herself.
She didn't remember ever being this sensitive; but her father's assessment of her skills really bothered her. They really thought she was only good at looking good. She thought of her parents and realized that she too had been that shallow. Well, at least she had changed a lot for the good in the last year. It didn't seem like they ever would. She didn't want to have to defend herself or Angel anymore. She sighed and went into the kitchen to get sugar for the coffee.
She had her head halfway into the fridge to retrieve the milk she had bought when she heard a vindictive voice. "I am on to your little charade with Angel. I know what you really do- that you are his secretary for real and his seer. I also know what he is and where he is. Wolfram & Hart is not above staging a murder that will give you a vision in order to get rid of Angel and get to you. We know that the only way to get to him is to get to you. And we really want him. It worked like a charm. He is gone and unless you want your parents to know ALL the truth; you will do as I say. You will give Angel to us. Otherwise I will tell them the truth and hurt you."
THAT did it. The little perverted troll had finally pissed her off. How dare he threaten her. And did he really think she would sell out Angel just to win her parents' approval? Well, ok, maybe the old Cordelia of Sunnydale might have. But she was a different person now. Angel was her best friend & she loved him. Ok, maybe not in the way she wanted to; but she loved him. And his safety was far more important than what her parents or this troll thought. "I would never betray Angel to anyone;. Especially not a loser like you."
She sighed and gave him a disgusted look; then nearly ran back into the living room to confront her parents. She never made it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Angel finished dispatching the last demon by smashing it against the wall and snapping its neck. He was surprised by the pleasure it gave him. He didn't usually get this vicious in his demon-killing; but he was taking out his fury at Cordelia's parents on the demons. He watched the demon evaporate and brushed the wrinkles out of his shirt. He wanted to get back to the hotel suite that Cordelia had rented for the evening. Cordelia's parents were awful and he didn't want anyone from Wolfram & Hart anywhere near her; especially that Michael. If that ass didn't keep his hands off of Delia; he would cut them off. Speaking of cutting off hands; he thought of Lindsay, and immediately recognized the new scent in the alley as his.
"Well. If it isn't do-good vamp boy, " greeted Lindsay from the dark shadows in the corner of the alley.
The alley was totally silent except for Lindsey's ragged breathing. Angel stood almost preternaturally still. He really hated Lindsey. Not only was he an attorney of evil who was constantly putting the evil back on the streets; but he had also tried to kill Cordelia. Angel had cut off his hand when he tried to burn the scroll of Aberjian. If the scroll had burned; Angel would have lost her forever to the visions in her head. Lindsay had deserved to die for trying to hurt Delia; but Angel had settled for cutting off his hand to get the scroll. Now he was starting to regret not killing him.
"What do you want?". asked Angel in a low, menacing voice barely audible to Lindsay across the alley.
"I want the same thing I have always wanted. You. Dead. Really , finally, dead. And also a stab at that hottie who is your secretary. But, hey, Michael probably beat me to that one." Angel cringed inwardly at that. If Michael had touched her ; he would die. Surely, he wouldn't try anything in front of Cordelia's parents; but with them, who knew?
Lindsay chuckled. "You are too predictable, Angel. Give Mr. Do-Right vamp boy another soul to save from evil and he goes for it like a dog to a bone. Even would leave the most precious thing in his life with an evil lawyer and her uncaring parents. Not very smart. What makes you think Cordelia's parents would try to stop Micheal if he tried to hurt her? They are on our payroll. And that couple already sold their souls- and now their daughter to us. And you left them alone with her." Lindsay couldn't help but taunt him.
But Angel wasn't listening. He had already turned and run down the alley digging his cell phone out of his pocket and punching in the number for Cordy's phone. But there was no answer. He growled and ran a little faster.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cordelia had not even made it to the living room of the suite before Michael attacked. Despite being tall and reasonably strong; her struggles were futile against him. She fought hard; wrecking the table and chairs in the kitchen and smashing cups on the floor. He grabbed her and squeezed her neck; cutting off her air. She sagged to the ground, unconscious. Michael took a moment to inject a drug into her veins of her left arm to keep her unconscious. He was met by her father and the two men carried her out of the kitchen. With Cordelia slung over his shoulder; Michael left the hotel suite with her parents.
Angel drove across town to the Acropolis Hotel; running several red lights in the process. Time was limited. He knew that Lindsey and Michael wouldn't wait long for him to get there. Angel could hear his demon seething inside him. < He touched her. If she even has a scratch; I will be unstoppable, soul boy. I will eat that bastard.>
He kept his eyes on the side mirror. Of course, he couldn't see his reflection; but he could see a small motorcycle follow his car at every turn. Wesley. <Damn him. I told him I was coming alone. And I do NOT have time for this.> thought Angel angrily. He pulled off the road and waited for the cycle to do the same. " Dammit. I TOLD you to stay at the office. I do not have time to argue with you. I am the boss. Do as I say. They will kill Cordelia unless I go alone. I have to get Cordelia out. I don't have time to worry about protecting you, too," Angel yelled at Wesley.
Wes pleaded, "At least let me be the outside guy. They don't have to see me. Just let me be the backup."
Angel did not have time to argue; so he gave in and let Wes into the car with him. On the backseat was a large bag filled with who knew what. Wesley looked at Angel's gaze- fixed determinedly on the road as he drove- and wondered if he would be able to stop Angel from killing Lindsay and Michael. He wasn't sure Angel would be able to stop himself.
When they reached the Acropolis hotel, Angel parked in back. It was located outside the city in an upscale suburban area and set back from the road for the ultimate in wealthy privacy. It was a three story, structure- totally modern in its amenities but with a theme reminiscent of old money and wealth. It was brand new and was ready to begin occupancy; but from the looks of it; it hadn't started housing guests. In fact, the only part of the whole place that showed any signs of habitation was a set of suites on the second floor with windows lit against the darkness.
"Perfect place for those Wolfram & Hart weasels to hide out. Their own little fortress.", said Wesley.
"Yeah, well, fortresses always have weak spots. Here's the plan. You go in the front. No one will recognize you. See if you can distract the security guards below."
"Ok," said Wes, "Where are you going?"
"I am going to get Cordelia," the response came as Angel took the bag from the backseat and disappeared into the night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cordelia felt a sloppy wetness on her face as she began to return to consciousness. She opened her eyes to see a very blurry Michael on top of her- putting his wet kisses on her face. She was awake but seemed to have no energy to move. With effort, the was able to turn her head away to avoid his slobbery mouth. Her arms and legs were untied; but seemed almost paralyzed. She didn't seem able to move them well.
" Well, the little Princess Bitch is awake. Just in time for the festivities. Too bad we had to drug you again. Lindsay didn't want you to be able to escape or to help Angel when he comes. Don't worry. It should wear off in about 12 hours and then you'll be mine." She squinted and said, in a hoarse voice that didn't sound like her own.
"I'll never be yours. I am Angel's. I will always be Angel`s. And he`ll kill you for touching me." Michael smacked her hard; and her head snapped to the side; and the delicate skin under her right eye started to sting and swell up in what she knew would be a large bruise.
She heard Lindsay come into the room. "The guards downstairs spotted his car. Let's get ready. We don`t know how he`ll come in. You stay in the hallway outside and guard this suite . I`m going to check around upstairs in case he comes off the roof. Richard is downstairs." Cordelia couldn`t believe they were discussing their plans in front of her. They must`ve thought she was too out of it to know what they were saying.
Michael sighed. "I guess I will have to wait awhile before I can have you. Sounds like the action is just about to begin." He got up and left the suite.
Cordelia lay on the antique-style sofa and tried to move but couldn't. She wanted to find Angel and help him with his plan; but she had no idea what it was or where he was. And she was fading in and out of consciousness thanks to the drug they had given her. She was starting to drift off but trying desperately not to when she heard a slight gasp and the "thunk" of a body falling outside her balcony window. She managed, after a lot of trying, to sit up just as the French door was beginning to open and a dark. silent form stepped over the body of the guard and came through. She wasn't sure where Michael and Lindsay and her parents were; but she thought they were in the adjoining suites and in the hallways. The dark form came up to her and she saw the chocolate brown eyes. It was Angel.
He saw the large bruise on her face and growled low in his throat.
She whispered, "Angel. Michael is outside the suite. Watch out they have a crossbow and stuff."
He didn't care. He just wanted her out of here before things got nasty. He reached over for her. "Can you walk?"
"Sure," she said; but promptly fell down when she attempted to do so. Angel picked her up and whispered
"Come with me. Outside and over the rail. We are only one floor up. If Wesley got rid of the guards below; we should be ok." He scooped her up and was almost to the French door when Michael burst into the front room of the suite with a large revolver and started shooting.
Angel instantly pushed Cordelia to the floor and threw himself on top of her; shielding her from the bullets. Guess asshole Michael didn't know he was a vampire and bullets wouldn't kill him. But they would kill Delia. In what seemed just a few seconds, Angel had used his vampiric strength to scoot quickly across the floor with her and drag her behind the oak desk in the corner of the room. Michael was a complete idiot; just coming into the suite and firing; not even really aiming; just shooting randomly and hoping to hit them.
Angel had counted at least 5 shots; but he wasn't sure how many bullets were in the gun. Or where everyone else was. At this point he didn't care. He had vamped out when Michael had started shooting and now launched himself halfway across the room at Michael. The shooting stopped as Michael went down under Angel's form.
Cordelia could do nothing but listen as Angel let his demon loose and she heard the sound of his fist connecting repeatedly with Micheal's head and the final sickening crack as Angel snapped the bastard's neck. Micheal's blood was all over from Angel pounding on him. After a second, Angel's soul seemed to take control again and he thought for a split second that he had just taken great pleasure in giving his demon free rein to viciously kill another human. But he didn't feel the least bit guilty because the bastard had touched his Delia. Now he needed to find out where Wesley was and get them both out of here.
He looked up at Cordelia ; still in his game face; ashamed that she had seen him kill Michael so viciously. But the look he saw in her eyes as she managed to drag herself across the room to him was one of approval; not horror. She managed a slight smile and whispered,
"I told him you would kick his ass." She had just reached him when Richard Chase entered the room holding a large cross and next to him was Lindsay with a crossbow in his hand.
Angel turned to look at Lindsay and Richard Chase in the doorway; armed with a cross and crossbow. He moved quickly to put himself between them and Cordelia. He stood and stared down Lindsay like a cat with its prey.
"Nice hand, coward. I can smell your fear from here." he growled.
"Good enough hand to pull the trigger on this thing and drive a stake right through your do-gooder heart." Lindsay sneered back. He didn't seem to have the sense to be afraid of the primal creature in front of him.
Richard Chase seemed to be in shock; his mouth just hanging open at the sight of Angel's demon visage in front of him. " Wha..wha..what is that? Cordelia, get away from that monster."
"No. He isn't a monster. He is Angel. And I love him and he loves me. He would never hurt me. Not that I can say the same for my loving Daddy." she cried.
"I will definitely hurt you," growled Angel, advancing on Lindsay. In seconds, Angel was rushing Lindsay; not caring that the crossbow was aimed right at his heart. Richard Chase did nothing but back along the side of the wall; away from the charging Angel. Just as Angel was about to lunge on Lindsay; fangs and yellow eyes descendant; the crossbow jerked and the stake flew. . .
. . . into Cordelia's abdomen.. Angel landed on top of Lindsay just as he heard Cordelia's agonized wail, " Aaauuughh." He looked up to see her curled up on the floor; holding her abdomen, a vicious looking stake protruding from it.
He didn't hear Lindsay's taunt, "I'd never just kill you. I'd kill her first. Nothing would pain you more than to see her die. So I thought I`d show you before I killed you." Angel didn't even hear his words. All Angel heard was the now small wails and broken breath coming from Cordelia and he felt his entire body overtaken by an angry red heat as Angel lost control and Angelus broke free.
Cordelia pulled the stake out of her stomach and put her hand over it to stem the blood flow. Her vision was becoming blurry again; but she saw Angel (or was it really Angelus?) quickly and viciously grab Lindsay and shake him violently; and pound him until Lindsay resembled a bloody mass. The demon in Angel was in control and was instinctually obsessed with one primitive thought - killing the enemy that hurt his woman.
When Lindsay was nothing but a bloody form on the floor and the violent frenzy had worn off; Angel(us) stopped and sniffed the blood on his hands- wanting to use this evil thing that had hurt his Delia as his food. But then, the more rational Angel regained control and his concern was taking care of his Delia. He shook off the desire to feed from the bastard Lindsay and turned to face Delia.
But she wasn't where she had been. Her father had grabbed her and produced a small gun from the pocket of his Armani suit; holding it against the side of her head. Cordelia was slumped over his arm; apparently only semi- conscious. Her wound wasn't gushing; but it wasn't trickling, either. The blood flow was heavy and steady and he knew if the stake hit an internal organ she would bleed to death.
Angel guessed she had lost a fair amount of blood and he wanted to get her taken care of soon. He stopped dead in his tracks; not wanting to startle Richard into shooting Cordelia. He couldn't believe a father would ever try to kill his own daughter. But then, Richard Chase didn't seem to be much of a father.
Richard Chase clutched the slumped form of his daughter to him; almost hysterically. Angel heard Cordelia's thready voice choking out; "Please, Daddy, no. Don't. I`m sorry." He could hear the sound of distant sirens coming closer. So the sound of gunshots must've gotten someone's attention and they called the police. Or Wesley did.
Hopefully, an ambulance, too. Richard was now rambling almost maniacally. He was trying to back towards the door of the suite, dragging Cordelia with him; gun still at her temple; his eyes never leaving Angel. Angel was frantic, the demon inside him roaring; but he forced his face to return to human. He had to try to reason with the hysterical man with the gun. "Mr. Chase, please. Put the gun down. Cordelia is hurt. She is your daughter and you love her. Please let me get her help. If you want to kill me, fine, I'll let you. Just let her go".
Richard rambled at him; "Stupid bitch. Never could be a success like the rest of us Chases. Imagine a Chase being a secretary and to a monster. Couldn't even be enough of a beauty queen to win pageants and get us some fame. I can't believe she takes up with some THING and is working as his secretary. A Chase. Bitch has humiliated us for years. Can't even make it on her looks. No, I don't love her. Never have. But she was a Chase, so I had to at least dress heer well. Didn`t want her to humiliate us." Angel could see tears welling from Cordelia's slightly open eyes and her consciousness fading. He could hear her heart beating faster in her fear , which made her blood rush faster, which made her bleed faster. He was afraid she might bleed to death if he couldn't get her away from her father. Not to mention getting shot. He tried to send her calming thoughts; but he wasn't very calm now, either.
Behind Richard, he could see Wesley start to rush into the room; unaware of the gun at Cordelia's temple. He saw Wesley stop dead in his tracks as he saw Cordelia slumped against Richard's chest and the gun pressed to her head.
Richard's hand was starting to shake as he sidled towards the door. "Damned IRS took everything. I am wealthy, I shouldn't have to pay taxes. Helen and I would've been great in France living the good life. But, no, this idiot here calls us to come back and see our daughter so he can fulfill a plan to get to you. We didn't even want to see her; and now look where we are. I am not going to prison. I won't go to prison for tax evasion or for killing a monster. I won't go to prison. Stupid bitch. This is all her fault."
A muffled sound interrupted Richard's rant- the sound of heavy footsteps on the carpet in the hallway. Most likely the police. The pounding became louder and Richard briefly turned his head towards it and involuntarily moved the gun a fraction of an inch above Cordelia's head. Angel took the opportunity and with his preternatural speed rushed forward and grabbed the gun. Cordelia fell as he struggled with Richard for the gun.
The scuffle stopped instantly as the gun wet off and Richard fell to the floor; with half of his head gone and blood everywhere. Cordelia had fallen across him and was now barely conscious. She grabbed Richard and cried, " Daddy. Daddy?? I'm sorry . Daddy?? Her head was lying on top of Richard's chest; his blood mixing with hers. She was trembling violently and sobbing incoherently.
Angel reached over and gently pulled her off her father; holding her and trying to soothe her. "Its ok, now , Delia. It's ok." She was so far gone he didn't even think she heard him. He knew her glazed eyes and violent trembling meant she was going into shock from blood loss. Wes ran up and told him that the ambulance was about 3 minutes away. "Get me some of those cloth napkins and a blanket," he cried as he held the trembling, now unconscious girl tightly to him. He used the large cloth napkin as a bandage over her wound and with one hand applied pressure on it to try to slow the blood flow. Wesley helped him wrap her in a quilt from the bed in the suite. He held her tightly, worried that her trembling wouldn't stop.
Angel watched; oblivious to all the other activity going on in the room; as the medics examined Cordelia; put an oxygen mask on her face; started her on an IV; and connected her to a heart monitor before loading her into the ambulance. As he rode in the back with her, tightly gripping her hand, he watched the medics constantly monitor her pulse and blood pressure; which he knew were both falling rapidly; and give her drugs designed to keep her from "crashing" before they could get her into the operating room. He could hear her heartbeat fading and see the little green line on the monitor tracing a less regular beat. And he could smell the blood rushing out of her.
As they pulled into the emergency door of the hospital and the medics rushed her inside; Angel thought about the horrible events of the day that hurt Delia's mind and body; and he was frantic that they might cost her her life.
Angel sat quietly next to Cordelia's hospital bed; watching the even rise and fall of her chest as she slept. The room was dark despite the afternoon sunshine outside. The only lights were from the phosphorescent green light bouncing regularly on the heart monitor in time with her heartbeat and the tiny green lights on her IV. The nurse had just left from getting her settled and the room was finally quiet. He cradled one of her hands between both of his and sighed. After the events of the following evening; he was just starting to come down from the high intensity excitement level and could finally relax a little. He closed his eyes and reveled in the silence of the room; broken only by the slight hiss of the oxygen mask on Cordelia's face, the blip of the heart monitor and the beeping of the IV .
Now that the immediate threat to Cordelia was past; he could think through the situation. Cordelia had just been brought down from the OR. She was not yet conscious; and she might be unconscious for several more hours. The doctor had told him the extent of her injuries after Angel had lied about being her husband. The stake had nicked her spleen; causing profuse bleeding. She had been in shock when they arrived and had lost almost half the blood in her body.
She had " crashed" and her heart had stopped during surgery from low blood volume. They had had to keep up resuscitation for 20 minutes while they transfused four pints of blood. She had been in surgery for five hours. It would be several weeks; but with rest and care; her body would be fine. It was her mind he was worried about. He knew the events of the night before and her father's betrayal would affect her deeply.
His thoughts were interrupted by Detective Kate Lockley barging into the room. "All right, Angel. I want to know what you are involved with this time," she confronted him loudly.
<Damn. I don't need this now, he thought.> Even though Cordelia was unconscious; he didn't want her to "hear" about what had happened. At least until she was strong enough to handle it. And some parts maybe never. "We'll talk outside," he said; motioning towards the hallway with his head.
Kate waited outside the door; while Angel held back. He kissed Cordelia on the cheek and whispered, " I'm just going right outside the door. I'll be right back." He didn't want her to think she was alone if she awoke when he was out of the room.
He followed Kate just outside the door; positioning himself so he could look through the door glass at Cordelia. "Kate? What? This really isn't a good time." But Kate wasn`t to be deterred.
"Multiple gunshots all over that suite. Luckily for you, they'll probably match the guns registered to Michael Sloane and Richard Chase. And the gunshot to Chase looks self inflicted. But there are two dead men that look as if they were beaten to death. One of them was a high powered attorney who also happens to be a big enemy of yours. And I've seen what you can do in a fight. You need to come to the station with me."
Angel was adamant. "Not now. Not until Cordelia wakes up. I am not leaving her."
"Yes, and as a witness; I'll need to speak to her, too."
Angel refused. "Why don't you talk to Wesley? He was there."
Kate's look spat venom at him. "I did. He said that it was self defense. The men attacked and you and he had to defend yourselves and Cordelia."
Angel was puzzled. "Then why do you need to talk to Cordelia at all?"
"We are also questioning Helen Chase. Besides being almost incoherent; she claims to have been downstairs in her suite when the gunfire started. And she was too afraid to go upstairs. So we HAVE no other witnesses besides Wesley and Cordelia So I WILL talk to her."
Angel was furious. "Fine. When she is conscious and stronger; you can talk all you want."
Kate huffed. "Fine. I'll have the nurse call me when she is conscious." She stomped away. Angel sighed, suddenly tired, and returned to Cordelia's room.
Angel resumed holding Cordelia's hand and stroking her forehead. Her eyelashes fluttered periodically and she stirred; but remained asleep. He was so focused on Cordelia that he didn't even realize someone else had entered the room. Helen Chase stood in the doorway; sniffeling and eyes wet with tears.
Wesley came up behind him and put his hand on Angel's shoulder. " Has she woken up yet? Why don't you go outside and talk with Mrs. Chase. I'll stay with her."
Angel had been here for hours ; first waiting for Cordelia to get out of surgery; then by her bedside. Wesley wanted him to go get some rest; but he knew Angel wouldn't go far from Cordelia's side. He knew that Angel felt guilt at not having gotten to the hotel sooner. Not protecting her better.
Angel didn't want to leave her again; and he DIDN'T want to see that bitch Helen Chase. But he also didn't want Cordelia to hear their conversation. "Don't leave her," he told Wesley; as he kissed Cordelia on the forehead and left the room again. Wesley took Cordelia's hand and settled in next to the bed.
Helen Chase sat in the ICU lounge chairs across from Angel; who was standing almost sullenly with his hands in his pockets and pacing. He tried to feel some compassion for her; since she had just lost her husband and almost lost her daughter. He was glad she hadn't been in the suite when it happened. SO she had no idea he was a vampire. But, everything that had happened was at least partially her fault and his compassion didn't seem to be forthcoming. Helen spoke first.
"Well, I guess Cordelia was misleading us about her relationship with you. You certainly seem more than a fake boss. And she seems like a real secretary. You seem to care for her very much. " <A hell of alot more than you do,> Angel thought. But he stifled it before it came out. Now wasn't the time.
Angel sighed. After all that had happened, she was upset that Cordelia decieved her? "Look, Mrs. Chase."
"Please call me Helen", she interrupted. Angel didn't want to call her anything; least of all something so familiar.
"Mrs. Chase," he said again, pointedly ignoring her request. "Cordelia is my secretary in real life. She is also an aspiring actress. She has been since I came to LA. I am her real boss. I am also in love with her. And she loves me. < He thought that he had never said that out loud before! Weird time to think of that!> I am sorry she tried to deceive you. But she was afraid you would be ashamed of her." "And, anyway, that is the least of the problems today. Are you aware that your husband held a gun to her head and threatened to kill her? That he told her he never loved her?" Just the memory of it made Angel want to vamp out. He bunched his hands into tight fists in his pocket and clenched his teeth as he struggled to retain his human face. "I only hope she was too far gone by then to remember it."
Helen started to cry again and Angel felt some compassion slide in. He handed her a tissue from the box on the end table but couldn't bring himself to comfort her. "I know. I was downstairs when the gunshots started and I ran to the stairway, but I was too afraid to go up. I know Cordelia was in danger; but I was too afraid to help her. I swear, I didn't know what Richard would do. I didn't even know he had the gun on him. But he always resented that Cordelia wasn't a boy and that she was useless to the Chase lineage He never loved her. He let me dress her up and teach her about makeup and stuff to at least capitalize on her looks. But when the IRS thing happened; he just seemed to go crazy. I wanted to take Cordelia to Europe with us but he wouldn't let me." She stopped and looked up at Angel ; her face looking far older than her forty odd years. "I love my daughter, Angel. I really do. I never meant for her to be hurt. And I certainly don't want her to die. I know I wasn't the best mother to her. As soon as the police investigation is over , I am being allowed to return to France. But I would like to see her before I go. And be a part of her life again. And I am sorry for hurting her."
Angel paused and stopped pacing; sitting on the edge of the chair across from Cordelia's mother. He did feel a small amount of sympathy for her. Wanting forgiveness was something he could understand. But part of him didn't even want to look at her. She had hurt Delia so much!!
"Mrs. Chase, Cordelia is your daughter. I can't prevent you from seeing her. But I will not let you be alone in that room with her; not even for a minute. And I personally don't want you anywhere near her. But when she wakes up; if she wants you in her life again; I will respect that. But if you ever again do anything, directly or indirectly, that hurts her; you will have to answer to me. That is a promise. As for forgiveness; that is Cordelia's to give. But don't even bring up the subject until she is awake and stronger. I do not want anything to upset her any more until she is strong enough to handle it."
Angel entered Cordelia's room with Helen following some distance behind. He took Cordelia's hand that Wesley had been holding.
"I think she is starting to wake up. Her eyelids have been flickering and her hands twitching. And the nurse came and took her off the mask and put her on the nasal oxygen." Wes reported.
"Go ahead get some sleep," Angel told him, "And thanks for your help tonight," Angel called as Wes left the room. Angel stood holding Cordelia's hand in awkward silence with Helen Chase.
Cordelia's eyes were fluttering rapidly and her head turning back and forth. She started to move restlessly; as if she were having a nightmare. The beeping of the heart monitor became more rapid as her heart beat more rapidly and her breathing became more shallow. She looked as though she was reliving the horror of the night in a nightmare. She uttered a few incoherent cries. Angel stroked her hand and her face to quiet her.
"Shh, Delia. It's ok. It's Angel. You are safe. I'm here. It's ok." He tried to soothe her repeatedly. Suddenly, her eyes popped open as if she were startled and she looked frantically around the room and she started to breathe very rapidly. "Delia. It's ok," he repeated. "It's over. You're gonna be ok. You`re safe." She seemed to relax when her eyes fell on Angel. He stroked her face and continued to whisper soothing words to her until her breathing and heart rate calmed. After two attempts; she managed to speak in a weak, hoarse voice that Angel had to strain to hear.
"Angel. You're ok." Then, she turned her head and caught sight of her mother, and started to get upset again. Her face got a look of panic; as if she had suddenly remembered what had happened. "Angel, she gasped frantically, "What happened? Where is my father?"
Angel looked at Helen Chase across Cordelia's bed. Helen started to cry again and left the room. He was surprised that Cordelia had asked about her father so soon. He hadn't decided WHAT to tell her yet. And he sure as hell wouldn't tell her the truth. That her father had held a gun to her head and threatened to kill her. If Angel had his way, she would NEVER learn that part. She was asking again and looking up at him; and he still didn't know what to say. She was so weak and he didn't want to upset her and cause a setback. He stroked her brow and held her hand.
"Cordelia, sweetheart, your dad isn't here right now." < Well, THAT was true.>
"Where is he?," she asked groggily. She was starting to move around restlessly and the heart monitor started to speed up a lot. The doctor came in; perhaps alerted by the rapid beeping of the monitors. He shot a disapproving look at Angel; listened to Cordelia's heart with a stethoscope; checked her incision; and inserted a drug into her IV.
"That should put her back to sleep again. Remember, sir, she is still very weak and should not be upset. If you are upsetting her, you will have to leave." Angel gave him a menacing look until he left. Angel held Cordelia's hand and stroked it against his face as her breathing evened out; her heartbeat slowed; and she fell asleep again.
Detective Kate Lockley arrived with a scowl and entered Cordelia's room three hours later. The nurse had called her that Cordelia was awake and Kate was determined to question her; no matter what Angel said. Angel caught her arm as she entered and turned her into the hall again. "Angel, you can't stop me from questioning her."
"No, but, she doesn't know what happened to her father. Kate, he held a gun to her head and threatened to kill his own daughter. She loves him. She can't ever know that."
"What really did happen, Angel?", Kate asked; not sure she would believe him anyway.
"Look, I wrestled the gun away from him after he threatened to kill her. It went off and killed him. I don't mind her thinking I killed him in self defense. I have enough things to feel guilty for. I don't mind taking the blame for this one, too. I'd rather she think I accidentally killed him than have her know he would've killed her."
Kate looked at him suspiciously. Every time she tried to categorize him with the evil things of the world; she found he didn't fit with them. And the girl's father was dead accidentally; so what did it matter exactly how? "Ok," she relented. "If she doesn't remember, I won't tell her." Angel's gratitude was reflected in his deep chocolate eyes as he looked at her; then followed her into Cordelia's room.
Three days later
Angel wheeled Cordelia from her room and outside into the warm evening . As he bundled her into the convertible and helped to buckle her into the passenger seat; he thought about the past few days.
Cordelia was much better physically; although she would be weak for awhile. He had been given painkillers for her to help with the pain and help her sleep. He knew that with the proper care and rest; her body would heal.
And she seemed to have accepted the story that her father had been accidentally shot during the scuffle with Angel for the gun. She had cried for a long time when Angel had told her about her father shortly after she regained consciousness. He had held her as she cried and made him promise to go with her to visit his grave when she got out of the hospital. Angel didn't even want to think about that scum that was Richard Chase ever again. But he knew Cordelia needed it for closure; so he promised to go with her when she was completely healed.
Angel was relieved that she didn't seem to blame him for her father`s death. He thanked a god that he had no right to pray to that she didn't remember having the gun held to her head. The psychologist who evaluated her called it " repressing" a memory that was too painful for her to remember. But, the psychologist warned that just because she didn't remember now didn't mean she never would.
In fact, memories repressed immediately after a trauma tended to resurface later; often without warning. Angel hoped silently that it never became an issue.
Cordelia's mother had come twice to visit; but Cordelia had been so out of it from the painkillers that their conversation was brief. She seemed to welcome her mother's visit and Helen had promised to visit her again soon. Angel planned to be damn sure he was around when she came.
Cordelia sighed. "Oooh. It's good to be out of that place. Talk about bad food and lumpy beds." She sighed and reclined the seat. Angel squeezed her hand and said, " I'm glad you are out, too. I missed you. I love you. And I will take good care of you."
"My hero," she replied. He kissed her lightly on the lips and took off his coat to put over her. She smiled and rested her head against the seat. She was still so weak and so tired all the time. She was asleep before they got to the highway.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Helen Chase came into the office of Angel Investigations. She had called and told Angel she was coming; as he had requested. Angel didn't really want her to visit Cordelia; but he had no choice.
Delia was looking forward to the visit . "Mom!" she cried on seeing her. It was the first time Helen had seen Cordelia since she had gotten out of the hospital. The two women hugged tightly and Angel could see genuine tears in Helen`s eyes.
"You look great! ", Helen said to Cordelia.
"Yeah, well I should. Angel here has barely let me out of his sight for the past week.. Only to go to the bathroom. And even then, he knocks if he thinks I've been in there too long. " She glared at him irritably. "Like a guy's never heard of a woman bathing or shaving her legs? He's even making me stay here in his guest room instead of my apartment so he can fuss all over me full time." Angel looked a bit sheepish; but it was true. He was determined to care for her until she was completely healed. He had come so close to losing her that he didn't want to let her out of his sight.
The two women went downstairs to his apartment while he worked in the office to give them privacy. He tried to tune out the women's voices; but his vampiric senses picked them up. He felt a bit guilty that he could hear them; but too bad. He was not leaving Cordelia alone with Helen until he was sure Helen wouldn't hurt her like Richard had.
He overheard Cordelia talking to her mother. "I guess Angel told you that I really am his secretary. I am an actress, too, but things aren't going so well in that department right now. I'm sorry I tried to deceive you and" , <her voice hesitated,> "Daddy. But I didn't want you to be ashamed of me for not being a success."
Angel tensed; waiting to hear what Helen would say. If she put Delia down at all he'd toss her out on her ass; mother or not.
After a moment, he heard Helen's voice. "Cordelia, darling, Angel explained everything to me when you were unconscious in the hospital. And I have had a long time since the accident to think. All while you were growing up you were so beautiful. And all I could think of was that if I could show you how to dress and good manners; you could be successful and get a good man and the good things in life. I know you are poor now. But you have a job you seem to enjoy and are good at and a man who loves you very much. You are beautiful and strong and intelligent and sweet. And you speak your mind; like a Chase. And you may not have a lot of money; but I think you have the good things in life. You have a man that loves you. Angel saved your life and never left your side. You are lucky to have him. And I think he is good enough for you. Darling, I am sorry that I hurt you all while you were growing up. I really do love you. Can you forgive me for being such a bad mother? "
By now, Helen was crying and hugging Cordelia again. Both women were crying. Angel still didn't like Helen all that much; but he was glad she wasn't being vicious to Cordelia anymore.
Figuring that Cordelia would be ok with Helen for awhile in his apartment; he left the office briefly to give them some privacy for their reconciliation.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Cordelia tossed and turned in Angel's bed. She had been restless and crying out in her sleep. Angel had insisted she take one of the sleeping pills the doctor had prescribed; even though she didn't really want to. But it didn't seem to be working. This was the first time since she got home from the hospital that she had been so restless when sleeping. She had had nightmares most nights; but usually Angel would give her one of the sleeping pills and hold her and she would calm down and sleep.
She was twisting in the bedcovers, sweating, and occasionally crying out in her sleep. Angel stroked her face.
"Shh, Delia. It's ok. Go to sleep. It's ok." He laid down next to her and tried to calm her down and get her back to sleep. She continued to thrash around in the bed and murmur incoherently. Angel tried to soothe her; but the thrashing only seemed to get worse. He was holding her against him and gently rocking her; trying to get her out of the nightmare.
Suddenly, she shoved forcefully away from him and sat bolt upright in bed. Her eyes were still closed; and she gripped Angel's hand so hard she drew blood with her nails. Angel's still heart broke as the silence of the room was shattered by her scream. " Daddy, no. Don't hurt me! I`m sorry I lied. Please don`t hurt me!"
Damn! She had remembered.
Angel gripped Cordelia's shoulders; trying to get her out of the dream. But she continued to scream and cry; her eyes glassy. She didn't seem to notice that Angel was even there. " Daddy, please, no. Don't hurt me. I'm sorry I lied. I'm sorry." Her voice started a scream and ended on a whimper. Angel tried to hold her; but she sat rigidly upright; squeezing his hand. Angel couldn't think of what to do. He stroked his hand slowly up and down her back; trying to calm her.
"Shh, Delia, it's over. You `re safe now. Shh." After several minutes of Angel trying to calm her ; she finally looked at him.
She looked at Angel with a crestfallen expression on her face; eyes puffy from crying. "Angel, he tried to kill me. I remember. My father never loved me. He wanted to kill me so he could get away. I was nothing to him. Why didn`t he love me? What`s wrong with me?" Her voice tapered off into sobs again as she fell against Angel's chest; trembling and sobbing. He didn't know what to say. What she was remembering was the truth.
Her father was scum. "I know, baby. But it's over now. No one will ever hurt you again. I won't let them. It's ok. It's over now. Nothing is wrong with you. You are smart and strong and beautiful. " He continued to cradle her and stroke her back until she fell back into a restless sleep in his arms.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Angel took his time going upstairs the next morning. He wanted to give Cordelia lots of time and privacy. He wanted to give her some space. He didn't know how she would react this morning to what she had remembered last night. Damn! He wasn't sure how to handle this situation. Should he make her talk about it? Or pretend it never happened and let her bring it up when she was ready to? He wasn't sure what to do or whom to ask for advice; and it bothered him to feel so helpless. He waited about half an hour after hearing her leave the bathroom to get up and come out of his room. He saw her at his dining table; hair still wet from the shower; sitting next to the table with the spoon sticking out of her untouched yogurt; a faraway look in her eyes.
He approached her and said in a quiet voice. "Hey, how about I make you some eggs for a real breakfast."
She smiled faintly at him, "No, thanks. I'm not really hungry."
"Are you ok?," Angel asked.
She smiled again faintly. "Yeah, well, ok, not now, but I will be." Angel was so proud of how strong she was. "I mean, I know my parents weren't exactly the best. They never cared really about me. Only clothes and "Is that a Gucci?" I really didn't see Daddy that much. But I always thought he at least loved me a little. Well, at least enough not to try to kill my anyway." Her voice broke; but she stopped the tears from coming to her eyes and gave Angel the tiniest smile.
Angel smiled back at her. "I don't know what to do, Cordelia. What you need me to do to help make it better for you. Do you want to talk, or see a therapist or something? I love you and I want to do whatever you need for me to do to make it better. But I don't know what that is."
Cordelia thought it was amazing that Angel was always so strong and self assured; but now he was so scared at not being there for her the way she needed him to be. Could anyone else have a guy this sweet ? So, he drank blood and went "grrr" once in awhile. He was always sweet and gentle with her.
"I'll be ok, Angel. But can I have the day off today? I want to get together with my Mom. I want to talk to her and figure out what happened with Daddy. I want to know how he got all crazy like that. Why he tried to hurt me." Angel was reluctant to letting her go anywhere with her mother. Helen seemed a lot better; but after how Richard Chase behaved; Angel was afraid the same thing might happen with Helen. He still didn't trust Helen not to hurt Delia even more.
"Sure," He said. "I have to some stuff today. Why don't you have your mother over here?"
Cordelia knew why he wanted them at his place. She knew he was just trying to keep her safe. But she didn't want him to be all super-protective of her anymore.
"I want to go out and talk with her." At Angel's look of concern, Delia said, "I'll take the cellphone and call if I need you, ok?" He was so sweet and so worried about her; but relented easily.
He knew he was being over protective of her; but he was trying not to be. "Ok. I promise I won't be overprotective. But call me and tell me when you`ll be back." She looked at him doubtfully, and grinned. "Uh, I'll TRY not to be overprotective. Ok?" She squeezed his hands and put the yogurt back into the fridge.
"Oh, Angel, will you come with me to the cemetery when I am ready to go? I want to visit my father. And end this for me. Get some closure, you know." Angel was surprised by the request, but remembered that he had promised to go. And he'd rather be with her than have her go alone.
Especially at night. "Yeah, I promised I'd go." She gave him a small, fragile smile again and went to call her mother.
The wind whipped up through the slightly opened window of the convertible. The moon scuttled behind several clouds in the sky as the convertible sped down the road The roof was up; but Cordelia's window was down. She shivered a bit in the brisk air. Angel glanced sidelong at her several times; trying to gague her mood. Cordelia spoke in a soft voice. "My mother says that my father did love me. He just loved his money and position more. That is sad, don't you think? I hope I never wind up like that. Wanting money and things so much that I turn on my family."
Angel squeezed her hand and kissed her as she pulled into the parking lot of the cemetery. "No, I don't think you ever will." Especially the "new" Cordelia wouldn't. She took care of her "family" of Angel & Wes too well. She would die for them if they would let her. But Angel would make damn sure she was never in a position where she would have to.
They got out of the car and she took out the huge bouquet of flowers she had brought for her father. Angel boosted Cordy over the entrance gate of the cemetery and then leaped over it himself. Cordelia felt a little weird being there at night; so she started to babble. "This is TOO creepy coming at night. But I wanted you with me; so we couldn't come in the day." Angel took her hand since he could see better in the almost total darkness than she could. Cordelia was nervous being in a cemetery at night with a technically dead guy.
She thought all those years helping Buffy in Sunnydale would have rid her of the nervousness' but it hadn't. She was a little creeped; but she wasn't really scared. She knew Angel would sense any danger and protect her from it. Even now, she could see him scanning all parts of the cemetery for newly risen vamps and other dangers. Finally, they came across her father's recent grave.
Angel stepped back several feet to give Cordelia some privacy ; but not letting her out of his sight. He continued to scan the cemetery for any evil entities. Cordelia knelt down on the grass surrounding her father's simple headstone. It occurred to her that this was the first time she had ever seen it. He had been buried when she was still in the hospital. She laid the flowers in front of the headstone and started to speak to him; almost as if he was there.
"Daddy, it's me. Cordy. I am sorry you got killed. I am sorry about what happened to you with the IRS. I wish you could have talked to me about how you felt. Maybe we could have made our relationship better." She started to cry and Angel had to keep himself from going to her.
She put her head in her hands and cried; slumping almost over double. "Daddy, I am sorry that I couldn't be what you wanted me to be. And I'm sorry I tried to decieve you. But I think if you looked at my life; you'd be proud of this Chase. I have an exciting job; people that love me and that I love. And I help people. And Angel loves me a lot. I know you thought he was a monster; but he isn't. He IS a vampire but he is sweet and good and gentle with me. And he saves people. He loves me. And he would die for me." She was overcome with tears for a few minutes; then composed herself. She touched the letters on the headstone. " Daddy, I am sorry you were so unhappy. I know you think it is my fault that I wasn't what you wanted me to be. I tried to please you. And I'm sorry I didn't."
Cordelia shivered as the night started to get chillier. She sniffed and touched the flowers she had placed on her father's grave. " Daddy, I used to be kind of shallow and stuck up. I used to be mean sometimes. But my best friend, Angel, taught me all about forgiveness. Daddy, I am sorry I disappointed you. And I forgive you for trying to kill me. And I love you." She was overcome by emotion then and sagged forward on top of her father's grave; sobbing and shaking violently. " I forgive you, Daddy, " she kept repeating.
Angel looked at her; tears in his eyes. He allowed her to cry and say her goodbyes for a few minutes. He knew all about closure and banishing your ghosts.
After about 10 minutes, Angel went to her and gently picked her up from the ground. He heard her whisper, " Bye, Daddy, I love you. I forgive you." Her skin was cold to the touch; so he rubbed her arms gently; trying to get her warm. He led her out of the cemetery, over the fence and into the car. She was quiet as he started the engine and began the drive home; her breath breaking around quiet sniffles.
Angel stopped a few miles before the highway to look over at her. She had fallen asleep with her head against Angel's shoulder. He eased her into a more comfortable position against him and covered her with his leather coat. He kissed her on the cheek; and she didn't even stir. Angel held her hand as he continued driving home. He looked over at Cordelia; finally in a deep, restful sleep. Angel kissed her again; knowing that she would need time to heal completely. But he was glad that she had started to banish the ghosts from her past.
The End