Fears
By Beverly Greene
NOTE: This poem is protected by international copyright laws and may NOT be reproduced in any form without the author's expressed and written consent.
Yes, tears,
I am afraid.
I scare the hell
out of me.
I'm petrified
of what I am,
of who I am,
of what it means,
of what I believe in,
and of what I don't.
I'm afraid
of where my life
is taking me,
of where I'm
taking it,
and of the fact
that I'm not
what I thought
I would be
or who
I wanted to be.
I'm scared
that it isn't
going to get
any better,
or easier.
I'm afraid
I can't handle it.
I can't take it
anymore.
I'm tired.
I'm tired
of playing
this game
and now,
now, I'm starting
all over again,
a whole new game,
all new rules,
a whole new player.
And I'm already
tired of it.
I never thought
that it would
be easier
I don't think,
but I did
at least hope
that I would
be happier,
but I'm not.
I'm not happy,
or happier.
I hoped it
would be easier,
but it's not.
But, this is me.
This is how
I am.
And yet,
I can't even
get this right.
I still hurt,
I still cry,
and some part
of me
is still dying.
Why can't
I make it stop?
What will
fix it?
What can
I do
to finally
ease my soul,
to stop the pain,
to stop the tears,
to find happiness,
to find peace.
When will
I finally
find that someone
who will stay,
who will love me,
unconditionally,
unending,
completely,
for life?
There is so much
in me
that I
need to share
but it
dwindles
each time
my heart
gets broken again.
I feel so
damn stupid
for falling
for it
all over again,
and yet,
if I don't,
I'll never
let anyone in,
and if I don't,
I'll miss it.
It,
my one shot
at happiness,
and that
really scares me.
I'm just so
fucking scared.
Go to the menu page to select another original work to read!
� 1999 Beverly Greene owns all rights to this original poem.
This page is hosted by 
Get your own Free Home Page
This page was created by and is maintained by ![]()