Today, I'm gonna focus on Post Stardumb Depression. These guys skipped the stardom and headed straight for the slump, if you ask me. Yeah, it was me who stole your beer at the EMP. You guys didn't even want it! What gives? What's up with your drummer tuning his drums for a full goddamned, annoying hour while everyone else was trying to talk? He tuned those things for ages AND THEY STILL SOUNDED LIKE SHIT. Here's a tip for the PSD drummer. You don't hit the drums right. Your rhythms are tired and your tempos are no good. I mean, the songwriting sucks, but even a suck drummer can tart up a shitty song. Maybe with a lot of hard work, you can claw your way up to being 'bad.' That's bad meaning BAD, not bad meaning GOOD.
Okay, moving on to other business. There are some things that people should NOT have done which have made me mad. I WARNED you about this shit! The following people are skyrocketing to the top of my meticulously ordered shit list:
Cellmate Cliff: I don't like you riding your bike to work. I don't like that you always be poppin' vitamins or herbal supplements an' shit. It's stupid. And stop calling me 'dude.'
Mike Johnson: Dude, I'm KILLIN' you. You messed up BIG. BA-BIG!! I'm sorry, but don't fuck with the Porno's shit!
Officita's of Downtown Seattle: Damn! You all on the rag at the same time or something? I don't need to see no fakey smiles, but let's lose the 'cramps face.' Okay? Work with me, ladies.
NO peace for the pussy.
Porno Rico ***