-make it alright-
-chapter twenty-three-

Nick was in trouble. The other Boys were, too. The were all sick, they should have been on lying on their deathbeds. But something kept driving them to work faster and harder, earn more money.

They were onstage performing in an outdoor ampitheater. But the weather conditions were horrible, it almost looked as though they were performing in a hurricane. Heavy winds blew immense amounts of rain and hail, while lightning danced across the sky.

AJ�s already-skinny frame had lost a lot of weight. He had to hold onto the waist of his pants while he danced, simply to keep them from falling off. Nick , already not the most coordinated dancer, continually tripped over his own feet on the slippery stage. Kevin and Howie, who rarely sang lead to begin with, were demoted to members of the backup band.

But Brian- poor, poor, Brian. He was the worst of them all. He performed the entire concert while lying onstage in a hospital bed. IVs and oxygen tubes ran in and out of his body, while his frail right hand clutched his heart.

And through it all, one man looked on with laughter. He was seated in a leather recliner, underneath a waterproof canopy. He was surrounded on all sides by servants, ready to fill his champagne glass if he dare took a sip. His fat fingers were adorned in gold rings, as he counted out a thick stack of hundred dollar bills.

Melissa woke up with a gasp. She was a tad disoriented, and it took her a moment to collect her thoughts. Sitting up, she began to look around, desperately trying to discover her whereabouts. That�s when she saw BJ, Leslie and Angel, all asleep in the next queen-size bed.

That�s right, Melissa remembered. I�m in a Los Angeles hotel, for the Boys� video shoots. We start filming �As Long As You Love Me� tomorrow. 5AM call time.

Melissa glanced to the alarm clock on her bed stand. It was two AM. I shouldn�t bother Nickers. Its late, and he needs his beauty sleep, Melissa reasoned. But I had that dream for a reason- to warn Nick about Lou. I better tell him now, or else I may forget in the morning.

Still half-asleep, Melissa pulled herself out of her bed and trudged across the room. The hotel room she and the girls were sharing was connected to Nick�s room by a common bathroom. Melissa knew Nick well enough to know that he�d never remember to lock his side of the bathroom door.

Yawning, Melissa placed her hand on the doorknob. She was careful when opening it- Aaron was sharing the room with his older brother. The last thing Melissa wanted was to awake the youngest of the Carter clan. Brent too would share the room when he arrived in LA the next day.

Quietly, Melissa placed her hand on the doorknob. She was surprised that all the lights were turned on. The bright fluorescents were rather blinding, causing Melissa to rub her eyes. That�s when she first heard the noise�

It was rather quiet. Had Melissa had full use of all her senses, she might not have heard it. But without vision, the sound made itself more apparent. It was a deep sound from the very pit of one�s stomach. Passionately, it pleaded, �Oh, Nick! That�s it, baby. Give it to me!�

Melissa�s eyes flew open and her head shot up. Her vision was back, and she was able to take in the entire room. Not that she needed to. What she�d heard had said it all.

But Melissa couldn�t help but look. It was like driving by a car accident: you know you shouldn�t look. But something about it is so tempting; you slow down anyway, just to take a peek.

There, on the bed closest to the door was Nick. And Mandy. They lay on top the covers, their naked bodies exposed. Nick was on top, burying his head into Mandy�s long blonde hair. She had wrapped her arms across the expanse of his sweat-covered back. She used her position to pull her slender body closer to Nick�s. Her chin rested on Nick�s shoulder, eyes clenched together in pure passion.

Melissa was amazed. At that moment, Nick and Mandy seemed perfect together. Their bodies seemed to join together as if God had cut them from the same mold. The way they moved together, clinging to one another�s body s if they couldn�t bear to be apart. The rhythm they created was beautiful. The moment was picture-perfect.

Or would have been. If Melissa hadn�t been there to witness it. The sight made her want to throw up.

�God, Nick! That�s it, baby! Keep going�� Mandy called out. She threw her head back in ecstasy.

�Shh�,� Nick tried to quiet Mandy by whispering into her ear. �Quiet down. Someone�ll hear you.�

Mandy brought her head up to its original position, resting on Nick�s shoulder. Slowly, her eyes opened. She soon found herself staring directly at Melissa. Mandy�s mouth opened to speak, �I think someone already has, Nickolas.�

�What?� Nick asked. He craned his head around. His eyes landed on Melissa in the doorframe, and he panicked. Pulling away from Mandy, he dove underneath the covers. �Oh shit.�

But before anyone had the chance to say anything, Melissa disappeared. She slammed the door shut to Nick�s room. Once in the bathroom, she immediately climbed into the bathtub. She drew the curtains around herself, lying very flat against the floor of the tub. Her hands covered her face, as she began to sob silently in humiliation.

From her hiding spot in the bathroom, Melissa could still hear all of Nick and Mandy�s conversation. They�re bickering grew louder, as they stomped around the room. Probably trying to find their underwear.

�God, Mandy, how long was she there?�

A pause. Probably so that Mandy could shrug her shoulders. �Not long. Thirty seconds, max.�

�Why didn�t you say anything?�

�I figured she�d leave,� Mandy explained. �But she just kept staring. She was frozen.�

�We probably terrified her,� Nick reasoned. �I doubt she�s ever seen that before.�

�You can�t mean�� Mandy paused to burst into laughter. �She�s a virgin? But her and Brent-�

�She�s waiting until she�s married, Mand. I don�t see what�s so funny about that.�

Another pause. What�s going on out there? Melissa wondered from inside the bathtub.

The bathroom door opened. Melissa held her breath. Nick began to talk, �Go to bed, Mandy. I need to talk to her.�

Another door opened. Probably the one leading to our room. �She�s not in here, Nick.�

�Just go. I know where to find her.�

The door closed behind Mandy. Nick waited a few seconds before tearing open the shower curtains. He stared down at Melissa, who was red-faced and crying.

Melissa let out the breath she�d been holding. �How�d you know where to find me?�

�Easy,� said Nick. �You always used to hide in the bathtub when were played hide-and-go-seek. Now, shove over!�

Nick climbed into the bathtub at the opposite end. He sat facing Melissa, as he arranged his long legs surrounding her body. He wore only a fluffy white hotel bathrobe.

�Aaron wasn�t in there, was he?� Melissa asked. It was her first and most important concern.

Nick rolled his eyes. �God! Of course not! What do you take me for, some sort of sicko?�

Melissa just glared, her arms crossed in front of her chest. Nick sighed. �He got in trouble for teasing Angel. His punishment was to sleep in Mom and Dad�s room. That�s why I came to get Mandy from your room.�

Melissa must have already been asleep at that time. She didn�t remember Nick stopping by the girls� room. Where Mandy and I are supposed to share a bed. Melissa shuddered at the thought.

�I don�t know what to say,� Melissa finally spoke up. �Other then the fact that I�m really sorry. And really embarrassed.�

�I�m really embarrassed too,� Nick admitted. His face, sure enough, had turned bright red. �But I�m not angry at you. I know it was all a mistake.�

They were quiet for a minute, each lost within their own thoughts. Melissa had so many questions she wanted Nick to answer. She just wasn�t sure how to phrase them properly. The last thing she wanted was to offend Nick.

�So when did you and Mandy�� Melissa paused, in search of the right words. �You know, first sleep together?�

Nick shrugged. �A couple of months ago.�

�You don�t mind me asking you these questions, do you? Melissa asked Nick quickly. She had the feeling he was uncomfortable.

He shrugged again. Nervous reaction. �I don�t care. I mean, I shouldn�t care. You�re my best friend. We should be able to talk about this stuff.�

Another pause while Melissa and Nick thought about what he�d just said. He continued on, �I just want to make sure you�re okay with everything. I mean, walking in on me and Mandy wasn�t what you probably expected.�

�No, it definitely was not.� Melissa agreed. Then she rolled her eyes. �But contrary to your belief, Nickers, I have seen people have sex before.�

�Oh you have, have you?� A smirk appeared on Nick�s face. �That doesn�t seem like you. You�re such a good girl, Liss. When did this happen?�

�My 17th birthday. We rented a penthouse at the Four Seasons and spent the night watching pay-per-view pornos.�

�Sounds like fun,� Nick commented with a laugh. He tried to picture Melissa watching a porno. He imagined her red in the cheeks, covering her eyes with a pillow and giggling hysterically whenever she took a peek. It�d be pretty comical. �Where was I?�

�It was fun,� Melissa nodded her head in agreement with his statement. �And you�you were where you always are. Busy with the Boys or off with Mandy. I can�t remember which it was that time. But Brent was there.�

A pause as they both collected their thoughts. �So is Mandy your first? Or has there been anyone else?�

�Yes and no. Yes she�s my first, and no there hasn�t been anyone else.� Nick answered. �I�m not a slut.�

�I�m just checking. It�s my duty as a best friend.� Replied Melissa. �And y�all are being safe?�

Nick rolled his eyes dramatically. �Yes, mother.�

�Well, you�re a 17-year-old boy. I had to make sure you�re thinking with your brain, not your dick.�

�You say 17 like it�s so young.� Nick complained.

�It is young!� Melissa defended her position.

�You should be happy I held onto my virginity as long as I did. Most guys have lost it by age 16.� Before Nick took the time to think, he blurted out another statement. �Not all of us can be this model child of chastity, Miss Perfect.�

�Is that what you think I am? Perfect?� Melissa wasn�t sure whether to be flattered, angry or shocked.

�I think you try to be. And when others don�t fit your definition of �perfect,� you look down on them.� It was the most honest Nick had been with Melissa in ages.

�You�re not describing me. That�s my mama.� Melissa insisted.

�You�re more similar to your mom then you�d like to admit, Liss.� It was the type of honest retort that really stung. Especially coming from Nick, with whom she�d spent so many hours complaining about her mother with.

�I don�t look down on you because you�ve lost your virginity, Nickers. It�s not like that. It just sort of shocked me.� Melissa sighed. �And I guess, deep down, it scares me.�

�Why does it scare you, Liss? I told you that I�m safe.�

Melissa shook her head. �Its not that. Well, not really. That�s part of it, but not the main reason.

�It scares me because we�re growing up. And I hate growing up. Why do you think my favorite ride at Disney is Peter Pan�s Flight?�

Nick laughed at her joke.

�All of the sudden, its really hit me. In a couple of months, we�re going to be adults, Nicky. And I hate it. A couple of years ago, all our conversations centered on practical jokes and TV shows. And now what do we talk about? What kind of car we want to buy. Where we want to go to college. What we want do with the rest of our lives. What position is the best in bed.� Melissa brought her knees to her chest, hugging them. �I guess that�s part of the reason I�m waiting until I�m married. My virginity is the only part of my childhood I can hang onto.�

Melissa looked so innocent at that moment, rocking back and forth on her sit bones. It was such a great quality, Nick realized. Melissa was right, she was different from other girls her age. She radiated an aura of childish vulnerability. That whole girl-next-door vibe. And the older she got, the sexier it became.

Wait, what am I thinking? Nick stopped himself. I have Mandy. I shouldn�t be thinking of Melissa in that way. She�s my best friend. Sure, I might�ve liked her at one point. Okay, like my entire life. But that�s over now. Mandy�s my girl. I don�t like Melissa like that any more�do I?

�You know how great I think that is, don�t you?� Nick asked Melissa. �I mean, the fact that you�re waiting for marriage. I really respect that.�

Melissa nodded her head. �I know. That�s how everyone feels. But it sucks, not knowing anyone else who wants to wait. Its like when I was younger- I was the tallest person in my class all through elementary school. But then, in 6th grade, I stopped growing. So I stayed at 5�3� while everyone else passed me up. And I guess that�s what I kinda feel like right now- that you�re passing me up once again.�

Nick placed his hands on Melissa�s shoulders, stopping her from rocking. �Its not a competition, Liss. And even if it were, you�d outrank me in maturity any day. In fact, you�re probably more mature then most kids our age, simply because of the fact that you are waiting.�

Melissa looked up at Nick, her full lips forming into a thin smile. �Thanks, Nickers.�

Nick returned to his original sitting position, leaning against the back of the bathtub. �So why�d you come into my room anyway, Lissie-Liss?�

That�s right. In all the commotion over seeing Nick and Mandy together, Melissa had forgotten her original mission. �I had a dream, Nickers. I think Lou is trying to screw you over.�

Nick listened to Melissa�s story patiently. But at the end of it all, he shook his head tirelessly. �I don�t know, Liss. I hear what you�re trying to say and all, but I don�t know if I buy it. Especially coming from you and all. You were Lou�s biggest fan at first. I mean, you were the one that convinced me to join BSB instead of MMC.�

�I know how crazy it sounds. But maybe the fact that its coming from me should be all the more reason to proceed with caution when it comes to Lou,� Melissa reasoned. �Besides, you should be glad I convinced you to join BSB. You�d have been on MMC for only two seasons before it got cancelled. And now you�re in this hugely successful band, and where are all those MMC kids? Nowhere.�

�I don�t know about that.� Nick shook his head. �Which reminds me, I have a present for you. Follow me.�

Melissa and Nick hopped out of the bathroom. Nick re-entered his bedroom, heading straight for his suitcase. He began to plow through his belongings, in search of the present. Melissa was stuck inside the doorway, unable to precede any further. She just couldn�t bear looking at that bed.

�Here it is!� Nick said. He turned around and saw Melissa, still clinging to the doorframe. �You can come in, you know. I don�t bite.�

�It just makes me uncomfortable,� Melissa muttered. She motioned her head towards the bed.

�Oh.� Nick realized. �You wanna go out on the balcony?�

Melissa smiled. �I�d like that.�

Nick led the way past the bed as quickly as he could. Sliding glass doors in the bedroom opened onto a wide balcony. Both he and Melissa collapsed onto the lawn chairs. It was a warm and still night. Peaceful. The calm before a storm.

�Here,� Nick said. He handed Melissa a CD. �I thought you�d like it.�

Melissa fingered the CD, staring at the cover art. �Hmm�N�Sync, huh? Talk about a stupid name. Hey- is that JC? Oh Lordy, it is, isn�t it? And oh my Lordy, there�s little Justin! But he�s all grown up! I had no idea they were in a group together. Oh Nickers, how�d you find out about this?�

Nick had a difficult time trying to talk, as Melissa�s arms had been thrown around his neck. �Flip the CD over. Recognize anything?�

Melissa followed Nick�s instructions. �TransCon Records�Wright Entertainment Group. Nickers, that�s your management!�

�Bingo,� said Nick. There was a twinge of remorse in his voice.

�I don�t get it. What�s the deal?�

Nick shrugged. �Not to sound conceited or anything, but we began to get so popular, there were more gigs in Europe then we could handle. So Lou & company found another group of five white boys who sing and dance that could fill in when we were busy. Substitutes.�

Melissa frowned. �As much as I love JC and Justin, that sounds like bad news to me.�

Nick nodded. �All us guys have been pretty annoyed about it. Especially Kevin.�

�I can imagine,� Melissa agreed. �I don�t know, Nickers. I�m not your mother or anything. But it just seems to me that you should be a little more careful when it comes to trusting your management in the future.�

�I�ll think about it,� Nick said sincerely. �Jesus, it must be almost sunrise.�

�I know. We should get some sleep.� But the thought of sharing a bed with Mandy seemed anything but peaceful.

�Mandy�s probably already asleep,� Nick said, as if reading Melissa�s thoughts. �Wanna crash in here?�

The thought of sleeping in that bed seemed even more disruptive. But it only took Nick a moment to pick up on that thought as well.

�Or its warm outside,� Nick continued on. �What do you say we have a campout? For old times sake?�

A childish grin broke through Melissa�s face. �Sounds great.�

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