(THe arena goes black, and a blue smoke is seen emerging from the ramp. The Undertaker's music hits, and a figure wearing a hat covering his face emerges. The crowd are on there feet in applause for a legend of wrestling. He walks into hte ring, exactly as Taker usually would. He walks up the steel steps, and stops on the top, as the lights come on. THe crowd roar even louder, as they realise the man is not Undertaker at all... he is too short to be Taker. He removes his hat, and it is none over than Revolution's own Rhyno! He adresses the crowd.)
Rhyno: "Well, for a short time there, all of you must have thought i was the deadman himself! However, much like when you wake up on Christmas morning, expecting a pair of socks, and unwrap a Playstation 2 complete with EMF Shockwave the game... you got a VERY pleasant surprise when the lights came on, instead of that loser Taker... you got ME! And, while i'll admit that was a half decent entrance... you are about to see one a million times better... ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, being accompanied by the EMF Women's Champion... He is the EMF Television Champion... JOHN CENA!!!"
(Basic Thugonomaics blasts out, as John Cena emerges, with Trish Stratus by his side. He has the TV Title around his waist, and the fans are roaring much louder than they did for "taker" as he enters. He takes a mic, and addresses his fans.)
Cena: "Well, thanks to two certain EMF superstars... here i stand before you all, with only ONE championship belt! I went into the tag title match last week... KNOWING that the Dangerous Alliance couldn't beat Revolution.... and we came so god damn close to winning the gold we deserved! But... two jealous SOB's had to screw us over... because they didn't want to see a team do well... do better than themselves! In fact, as they have made it clear they want the titles... i think they are SCARED of Revolution, and knew they had a much better chance beating the Dangerous Alliance than beating me and rhyno... so when Rhyno hit that gore, and was about to cover the WOrld Champion 1, 2, 3... they had to do the cheapest thing possible... TURN OUT THE LIGHTS!!! I mean, if they had come down and tried to screw us over WHEN WE COULD SEE THEM... then, even though that would have been cowardly as well... at least it would have been, in one way... fair! But to take us out in the dark... that's just the most cowardly act i've ever seen by two superstars! But now, they wont be able to play there cheap little underhanded games... because this week at Shockwave, it's John Cena and Rhyno Vs The Undertaker and Gene Snitsky, in a straight up, tag team match, and the winners will get a championship shot... only me and Rhyno already had one... and we were SO GOD DAMN CLOSE, to capturing the titles! All of you Thugomaniacs saw it! THat Gore had Angelus Archer out cold!!! However, the dangerous alliance may have escaped with the gold this once... but i can promise you they WONT AGAIN... coz once Rhyno and Cena defeat Taker and SNitsky... i will personally see to it that BOTH of those guys are banned... in fact... EVERYONE is banned from ringside if they aren't involved in the championship match! Ad although that may mean no support from the gorgeous Trish Stratus... it will be worth it to make sure, once and for all, that the Tag Team Championships are with the correct holders! And the correct champions ARE Revolution, as we proved, without a shadow of a doubt, last week!"
Rhyno: "Yea, to think i was even scared before we faced the Dangerous Alliance... they were a piece of cake! The easiest team in history... one gore and they were down and out... but i can ensure that one team we will beat with even more ease... is Snitsky and Taker! I've been in the ring with Taker before... and i know we can beat him, especially if all the help he has... is Gene bloody SNitsky... come on... what a joke!"
Trish: "Anyway... seeing as i'm meant to ask Cena question during his promos... John, on a scale of 1-10, how angry are you about the actions of Snitsky and The Undertaker last week?"
Cena: "1-10 wouldn't sum it up! I haven't been this angry at ANYONE since i've been here, those two got involved in a match that was NOTHING to do with them, and cost me the one belt i've been striving for since i've been in the EMF! This was my second Tag Team Title shot, and the SECOND time i've lost, but through no fault of my own! The first time was because my partner wasn't up to scratch... maybe slightly fair.. but the second because it was a FOUR ON ONE assault! And do you know what makes it even worse... the fact the Prez Mike REWARDS their actions! GOd knows i'd go to hell and back to get a Tag Team Title number one contenders match... they get one for ATTACKING TWO SUPERSTARS IN A MATCH WHICH WAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THEM. It's an absolute disgrace to our company, to it's fans, and to everyone else involved! Not only do the fans have the wrong Tag Team Champions, but instead of seeing a rematch here tonight... they get to see the worst Main Event in history.. as Cena and Rhyno demolish Snitsky and Taker, just to get what is rightfully ours in the first place! It is an absolute joke... i mean, the world understands why you'd give a Number One COntenders shot to a team that were screwed outta one.. but why would you put the team that screwed them in it? We should either just get the shot out right... or else face a team that deserve it, like Rey and RVD maybe... or just any team that ACTUALLY DESERVE to be in that type of match."
Trish: "I completely see that point John... ok, whether they deserve it or not... you opponents this week are the Undertaker and Gene Snitsky! How do you feel bout these two guys... firstly Undertaker?"
Cena: "Well the Deadman is someone who Rhyno here has a lot of respect for... why i shall never know! Yea, Taker and Rhyno have faced off before, and yes Rhyno got his ass well and truely kicked when they did... but that will not be happening again come Shockwave... the reason being, Rhyno is a lot better since then... and he has the TV Champion of the world prtnering him! Undertaker is the man thta, as a kid, i used to go and watch in the WWE! He was the man i wanted to be like. The way he traded the WWE Title back and forth with Hogan and the likes really amazed me... but Taker, you are PAST IT!!! Snce those days... you've become boring deadman... all the lights go out... you walk to your boring entrance music... it's EXACTLY the same each and every week... you bore people! Yuor not the legend you used to be... you say you have a "Decade of Destruction under your belt", well that decade ended a long time ago... when was the last time you held a major title in WWE Taker... more to the point... when did you EVER hold ANY title here... the answer is you NEVER DID! You haven't held a championship in AGES in the EMF, if you have at all, and you've been here longer than any of us... as i said, you have become boring, not only to the fans, but to the EMF superstars, because, Taker, we are so sick of seeing you get your ass kicked in week after week. Taker, if you get any worse at this... retirement must become a realistic option. I mean, you've been in wrestling for a LONG time, and you just aren't as successful as you used to be... you can't cut it here anymore... Taker, if you want my advice, do not face Revolution this week... you wouldn't want us to RETIRE you in the ring. WOuldn't you much rather just walk out of here... say you've had enough, and leave wrestling on a high... rather then being injured so badly by Revolution that you have to leave.
Trish: "Ok, and what about Gene Snitsky? What do you make of him?"
Cena: "SNitsky, are you sure you wouldn't rather be stepping into the ring with Trish this week... after all, you see to like scaring women.. god knows you did it enough in your little WWE Career... and we all saw you do it last week, after you screwed me and Rhyno outta our tag titles... However, maybe your too embaressed at what would happen if you had that match... because we all know Trish has better talents than you in the ring... after all, she's the Women's Champion, the top of her division, and my god, she deserves it. Unlike you Snitsky, you've never held a championship IN YOUR LIFE! After you invaded the little house show... you motioned your arms to symbolise an "imaginary Championship", and that's exactly what your dreams of being a champion are... IMAGINARY! Undertaker has at least held titles in his WWE days... and while it is nothing on the EMF, it is still a small achievement. YOu don't even have that. YOu couldn't cut it there, and you sure as hell can't cut it here! You get a kick outta threatening Women and babies... well i dare you big man, I DARE you to come out here, and threaten Trish, while i'm in the ring. Matter of fact, after how much "activities" we got up to last night... you may be threatening an unborn baby as well... but you'd know nothing bout that would you GENE? You took the piss outta Batista last week... for having a name like Dave, but with a name like GENE what position were you in! Also, you took out Todd Grisham! OH BIG MAN!!! NOt only is Todd not an active wrestler, but he ws in a cast for f**k sake! Gene, that doesn't make you big... it makes you SICK! And a week before that... when you once again threatened a Woman and her baby, though i guess that's what Gene Snitsky is here for! If there was a title for the sickest man in the EMF... you'd be a contender. However, i know from experiance what it takes to be a champion, and i know that it takes a lot more than being able to threaten those weaker than you Gene! YOu see this? *holds up TV Title Belt* This is something you'll never have! YOu wanna know why? NOt because it's mine,because one day it wont be, but even then you wont have it, because Gene, to get this I, and every other TV, or any other champion ever has to do one thing before they can win it, they have to beat someone who is a MAN Gene, unless you were trying for the women's title... to be a champion you'd have to beat a MALE PERSON! And that Gene, is something you are not capable of! You haven't got what it takes to take on ANY man one on one, in a fair fight! Whether it be John Cena!, Rhyno!, Punisher!, Angelus!, Jim Ross!, Prez M
ike!, TOdd Grisham!, whether he's a champion... or a commentator, or just a guy who randomly hangs around like Todd does... if it's not a woman, or a baby, Gene is scared of it, and that's the rule of life! So Snitsky, if you can stop yourself from wetting yourself out of fear for long enough... why don't you come out here and face me in a little warm up match and prove me wrong...?"
(Cena, Rhyno and Trish wait around, but nothing happens. SNitsky doesn't show, and the crowd begin to boo, as they were hoping to see some action!)
Cena: "See... my point is proven... Snitsky is scared of... well anything... would you come out if it was just Trish in the ring? How about fighting me with my legs tied together and a hand behind my back? No??? Ok, you can run for now... but come Shockwave, there will be nowhere to run. nowhere to hide, nothing for you to do but take the FU and be pinned 1... 2... 3! ANd when you are, Undertaker will see he has no use for you, will pick you up, and hopefully deliver you a HUGE tombstone! Because, you said who could want a better partner than Taker? Well, i don't rate Taker, but from his point of veiw, who could possibly be a worse partner than you??? YOur a psycho, with no in ring ability whatsoever... and the only reason your partnering Taker is coz your too scared of what he'd do to you if you didn't.. SNitsky, to sum you up in one word.. You are a JOKE!"
Trish: "Well... it certainly seems like you hate Snitsky... and rightfully so! Just make sure you beat him real good for what he did to me last week! Ok, one final question John, What will you do differently when you face the Dangerous Alliance for the second time?"
Cena: "Well, it's dangerous to look past any team... even if it is only Snitsky and Undertaker, so i am not even thinking about that yet. We will go into the ring, and get it done, then we can discuss tactics for beating the Dangerous Alliance at a 2nd attempt. FOr now, we can concentrate on Snitsky and Taker, not that we have to much... but still... anyway, enough talking here, you fans have seen quite enough of Cena for one day... the next time you see me, i'll be about to pin Snitsky 1... 2... 3... and earn a shot at what is rightfully mine! THe Tag Team Championships! WOrd Life!!!"
(REVOLUTION by motorhead blasts out, as Cena, Trish and Rhyno exit up the ramp. Rhyno disapears, but Cena and Trish stay and do some taunting to the crowd for a while, before making out on the ramp, and then exiting behind the curtain, with the fans roaring for more from their favourite superstar!)
