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Chapter 22 Branches When Tammy got to The House it was 1:00 in the afternoon and there was no one hanging around in the hallway, for which she was glad. She took her bags, went in the apartment, threw them on her bed, and then flopped on the bed beside them. It was starting to hit her now. She and Faye had broken up. Otherwise she would have thrown her bags down and gone right down the hall to Fayes apartment to see if she was home. No they would have been talking all this time and shed know. They would have made plans to do something and then have sex. Now she was single again, so she just got to come home to an empty house and now what? There was nothing to do, nothing to look forward to, and no one to do anything with. Francis had told her that Jan was already back and that Faye and Jan were already back together. I need to find someplace to put what Im feeling but first I have to figure out what that really is. There was a knock on the door. Tammy really wanted to ignore it. It could be Faye or worse Jan or even worse Faye and Jan and she just needed a little while to adjust to not being with Faye and them being together. Whoever it was knocked again and Tammy got off the bed and went towards the door still wondering if she should pretend like there was no one home or she was asleep. Come on, Tammy, I saw your car. It was Milly. Tammy sighed with relief and went to get the door. She opened it and waved Milly in so she could close it, glad it was just Milly. I like the do. Milly laughed reached up and ran her hands through Tammys hair. Then she gave Tammy a big hug and Tammy hugged her back. Then they parted. I missed you. I had to run by myself and I have to tell you I didnt run as hard or as often. I actually pulled a groin muscle on the pole one night and missed two nights work. She released Tammy, stood back and looked at her. You got a little color and the sun lightened your hair. You look damn good. Less troubled than Ive see you look in a long time. I think Well I dont really know how I feel. I think the thing Im most upset about is Well I got really used to having a girlfriend and even though its been mostly a holy mess for awhile now there were still parts of it that were really good and Im just glad its finally over, but I still miss her. The whole time I was on this trip I kept seeing things and thinking how much Faye would enjoy them and how next time I went on a cruise Id take her and show her that was if she chose me. Then when we broke up Id do the same thing and then have to remind myself that wed never be doing anything together again. She sighed. Im a little worried about how Im going to react when I see her with Jan the first time. I guess I just feel a little weird. Yet you broke up with her, Milly reminded gently. I had a talk with my dad. He said if I really loved her Id be fighting for her instead of just whining and mopping around. He was right. Besides we both know she was going to choose Jan anyway. Milly obviously didnt want to address that because she changed the subject. How was your trip? Milly walked over and sat on the couch. Tammy walked over and sat down beside her. Good. Fun. It was beautiful. Ive been before but I forgot how pretty it is and we went to see some ancient Mayan ruins and Id never seen those before and I took pictures. You want to see them? Sure. Tammy got up, went to her room, opened her bag, and dug around till she found her laptop. She liked to bury it in the middle of her clothes. She carried the computer back and sat next to Milly on the couch where she flipped through the pictures telling Milly what they were. Youre a good photographer, Tammy. Thanks, Tammy said. Its one of my dads hobbies. I just sort of hung on for the ride when I was a kid because I just thought anything he was doing was just the coolest thing in the world. He taught me a lot about how to frame shots and where to stand to get the best light and shit like that. He takes a lot better pictures than I do. He took this one of me and Mom at the Mayan ruins. Tammy started to click to the next picture and Milly grabbed her hand. What? Tammy asked, thinking Milly had seen something I the ruins she wanted to point out. Where did you get that shirt? Tammy shrugged, laughed and said, Lets see. Mayan temples and schools of dolphins and white sand beaches and you want to know about my shirt? Where did you get that shirt? Milly asked more urgently.
Tammy shrugged.
I guess its
Tammy thats
not I dont think so, Milly. The next thing Tammy knew they were going through her luggage and then Milly pulled the shirt from the suitcase and held it against her chest in a ball.
Its
not the same shirt, Milly. It cant be. I didnt go through Marcellas
things, I swear, and I dont think Its Marcellas shirt. She wore this damn thing half the time, Id know it anywhere, Milly said, shaking her head. She smelled it then held it up to Tammy, and said in an accusatory tone, Smell it. It smells like you. Tammy just gave her a look. Smell it. Tammy did just because she didnt want Milly to beat her up again. It smelled like her cologne. I havent washed my clothes yet. Im sorry, Milly, I didnt know I was wearing Marcellas shirt. Its not your fault, Milly sighed. You want the shirt? she asked Tammy, seeming to have calmed down. I sort of like it, but I dont need the shirt, Milly, Tammy said carefully. But you did. Here take the shirt. Milly handed it to Tammy and Tammy took it, afraid not to. Milly are you mad at me? Tammy asked. No, Im not mad at you. Im mad at the puppet master. Puppet Master? She knows who I mean. Come on; show me the rest of your pictures. Milly took her hand and led her back into the living room.
You
suppose Its all right, Tammy. I know how it got there. I dont know exactly why but I know how. But its weird. Dont you think its weird? Oh its way beyond weird, baby, Milly said. She sat back down on the couch. Show me your pictures. Tammy sat down started showing them to her again and actually forgot about the whole incident. They looked at the last of the pictures and then Milly looked at her and smiled. Why dont we go to the caf� and either get an early dinner or a late lunch? Im starved and I know Francis misses you something terrible especially since Adrians up to her pits in that new mural. Tammy nodded. They got up together and left the apartment heading for the caf�. Half way there Tammy looked down at Milly and smiled. Thanks Milly. What for? I was feeling pretty raw and now I dont. Its over. To tell the truth after the last couple of months Im just sort of relieved. Milly nodded silently. Dammit! What?
Well I got
you something from the I love presents, Milly said, turning and smiling at Tammy. When she smiled at her like that Tammy just couldnt even remember any reason to feel bad about anything. Its not that much, Tammy said. We can get it when we get done at Rhondas. Milly had turned back around to watch where they were walking. Is it pretty? Tammy smiled. I think it is. Then she laughed. Mom thought it was. I got one for you and Faye and one for Francis different colors. Dont tell me what it is, Milly ordered. Faye walked into the house with a certain amount of dread. She knew Tammy was coming home today. She just didnt know how she was going to feel when she saw her or how Tammy was going to feel or what sort of drama she could expect from either Tammy or Jan the first time they ran into each other. Jan swore she had no hard feelings and that she understood that Tammy probably did. She said that if Tammy just needed to vent that she was just going to take it. But just taking it wasnt really in Jans nature. She decided to just get it over with. She knocked on Tammys apartment door but there was no answer. She didnt know whether she should be upset or relieved. She and Jan. They still had a lot of shit to work through but Faye now felt like they could get through it. In some ways she felt closer to Jan than she ever had before. They still werent even talking about living together yet and she thought that was for the best. They should take things a little slower this time around and try to get things right instead of just diving into everything and then trying to figure out how to cohabitate after the fact. She walked into her apartment and felt the usual instant relief she always did when she got home. She threw her purse on the couch and Jan walked out of the kitchen with a beer in her hand, stark naked. Faye laughed, ran up to her and hugged her. I thought you were at work, Faye said. Nope. Jan set the beer down on a coffee table. She slipped Fayes shirt off over her head then unsnapped her bra and let it slip to the floor. I talked to Francis and she let me work my schedule around yours. I bought a new toy. She pulled Fayes pants and underwear down and Faye stepped out of them. You did? Faye wrapped her arms around Jans neck. Yeah, I think youre going to like it. It has three speeds, it straps on, and its a virgin. Francis ran over and hugged Tammy with such force she almost knocked her down. Tammy hugged her patting her back. I missed you. Tammy laughed. Even though it meant you got to fuck all over the apartment? Hell we do that when youre home. Francis laughed she let her go and they all went to sit at a table. Tell me all about your trip. Tammy started telling her. Halfway through it Jerry came over and took her and Millys order.
Francis sighed.
Ill have to hear the rest later I cant expect poor Jerry to handle all
the tables. She got up. I will be so glad when Tammy watched her walk away and for the first time in years she found herself thinking what a really great ass Francis had. She looked quickly away and Milly laughed at her. You get used to having it and the going without it just makes you horny as hell, Milly told her. Then you go without it long enough and Well you just start to lose desire. The longer you keep fighting your base instincts the more it becomes part of the routine not to have it. God I hope I dont have to go without for that long, Tammy said. I doubt you will, Milly said with a smile. Heres the thing though. Tammy took a deep breath and let it out, as if admitting to some horrible perversion. I dont really have any desire to just rack up girls like points in some game. I really liked having just the one girlfriend. I have no desire to just run around banging every even moderately attractive girl I see. Id rather masturbate. Milly laughed. I would, Tammy said with a smile. Seriously, Im not really into the whole sex for sex sake. Or getting involved with people who have a bunch of bullshit baggage. People who care less about you than you care about them or care more than you want them to. The constant drama is just too much to put up with for sex. I want I want what my parents have, what Adrian and Francis have. What Marcella and I had, Milly said sadly, and then she smiled and patted Tammys hand where it lay on the table. Youre preaching to the choir, baby. It was Tammys turn to change the subject. Hows your book coming? Good, its just about done. Then of course there will be the twenty rewrites. Milly laughed. Stellas right about me. I dont really like to let go of them. Did I tell you shes coming home the first part of October? No, thats good news. Of course I dont really know because I never lived in the house when she did, but from what everyone says she sort of keeps everything running smoothly. I dont know what it is about Stella, Milly said. Someone else can tell you the same thing and it wont help at all, but when Stella says it you just feel better. Youll see when she gets here. Jerry brought their food out and they started to eat. Half way through her meal Milly said, Im sorry Tammy. What for? Tammy asked with confusion. Im at least in a part to blame for pushing you and Faye at each other in the first place, Milly said. Tammy laughed and slugged Milly in the shoulder fondly. Come on, as big a mess as it turned into there is no way Id want to erase it. She smiled wickedly. Faye taught me a lot. Milly laughed. I bet she did. I Well, I like Faye a lot. We were really good friends and I hope we will be again. Its just going to take awhile is all. Id like for all of us to be able to go do things together again.
The
incestuous nature of our lives more or less dictates that we just slide our more nefarious
activities to the back of our brain to be able to continue our friendships which are more
important, Milly said. However I do think Ive learned my lesson about
match making. If people are meant to be together theyll find each other. I mean
Well, look at Francis and Tammy nodded in agreement. Francis ran back over and sat down with them. Finish telling me about your trip. Tammy had to remember where she was and then she finished telling Francis ending with, You and Adrian should go on that cruise. Youd have a blast. You know they have all lesbian cruises, Milly said. They do? Both Tammy and Francis said at once. Yes. Theyre wonderful. Marcella and I went on one and we had an absolute blast, Milly said. Its pricey but you guys could afford it. We should all go together. That would be so cool, Tammy said.
Francis,
the guys here with the beer order! Jerry yelled across the restaurant. You know what I keep remembering? What? Tammy asked, turning back towards Milly. That day we were all playing basketball. We should do that again as soon as it cools off a little. That was a lot of fun. Yes, thats what I want to do in my down time when Im practicing basketball two hours ever day, Tammy said with a wry smile. You know its not always about you, dear. Tammy laughed and said, Im pretty sure it is. So, you said you had the talk with your parents. How did that go? Amazing. Dad seemed to be more on board with it than Mom was, but all and all they let me know theyre very supportive. Part of me knew they would be and another part of me was just so afraid I was going to end up like everyone else I know with no parents. Oh, we have parents; they just dont talk to us. You never talk about your parents at all, Tammy said carefully.
Milly shrugged.
Why would I? My father went off to follow his career and start his important
family when I was like three. Hed call twice a yearonce for Christmas and once
for my birthdayand send me some elaborate, very expensive gift. I think I saw him
like twice from the time I was three til I was sixteen. I saw my half brother and
sister once. They actually took me to Disney World with them but that was a fiasco in way
too many ways to count. My mother cared more about her career than anything else and I was
mostly raised by a series of nannies. When I came out to my mother when I was sixteen, she
said I was just trying to ruin her career and she tossed me out on my ass. My dad said I
could come live with him, but it meant moving and I had a girlfriend at the time so I
stayed and my dad sent me money to live on while I finished high school. I moved back to He didnt even come back for Marcellas funeral, Tammy said. I didnt tell him. He never met her. Hell, he never even talked to her on the phone. Besides, I didnt want Marcellas death turned into a fucking circus and thats what happens when Dad does anything. Besides how would having him there have helped? I dont know him and he doesnt know me. Im sorry, Tammy said. Because I have such crappy parents or because you have such good ones? Both I guess. I dont need them, Tammy, Milly said, but there was a tremor in her voice that didnt match her words. I dont. My mother can kiss my whole ass and my father Well he could come visit me any time he wanted to or he could call, but he doesnt. I still havent told him Marcellas dead because I dont want to hear him act like he gives a damn. Tammy was sorry now that shed even brought it up. She sat there chewing on her lower lip trying to think how to change the subject. Milly laughed at her. Finish eating so we can go back to your place and you can give me my present. Milly was going through her closet trying to find something that would go with the beautiful coral earrings and necklace Tammy had given her. She wound up calling Francis. What? Francis asked.
Are you
wearing black?
What about
Faye? Oh thats right. Should I wear a long dress or a short one? If you wear a long one I wont have to compete with your legs, Francis said, a hint of laughter to her voice. All right, long it is, Im wearing that teal sleeveless thing I bought when we were out the other day. Should I wear the aquamarine necklace and earrings Tammy got me? I was going to wear the ones she got me, Milly said in a disappointed voice. So? Theyre different colors, different stones, we could both wear them. Even if someone notices theyre the same design, who cares?
Cool.
Milly said. In the background she could hear Can you hear that? Francis asked with a laugh. Yes. Im guessing you dressed her again.
Oh and now
shes trying to rip the crotch out of these, which she isnt going to do because
theyre leather, she said, apparently loud enough that Milly laughed. Ill be down in about forty minutes.
Were
leaving in about fifteen. No I hate down town traffic. I could just throw my clothes on and put my makeup on in the car. Tammy just said shed wait for you, so take your time. Great, tell her I said thanks a bunch. She hung up again and started getting dressed. The phone rang. She looked at it, saw who it was, and ignored it. It was the third time hed called that day and she just didnt want to talk to him because if she did she was going to have to tell him about Marcella and she just didnt want to. Maybe shed call him tonight when she got back from the opening. Or maybe shed forget that hed tried to call and not call him back at all. Adrian was looking at Francis who was spinning around for her approval. Well? Francis asked.
Better
spin around again so I can be sure,
Francis walked
over and wrapped her arms around You look amazing. She started to kiss her, but Francis stopped her letting go of her and pushing out of her grip. Honey, youre going to smear my make up.
Well we
cant have that can we? Yes, but wed definitely be late. A few minutes later they were in Franciss car heading for the hospital, and Adrian realized that shed probably driven the car more than Francis did but she didnt tell her that. I just hope theyre going to like the painting. How could they not like the painting? Its beautiful, Francis said. I dont know. I havent talked to any of the main honchos. Hell, even Billy hasnt seen it. I thought thats the way you liked it, honey, for the people you painted it for not to see it till you were done. Im just afraid people will expect something on the scale of Its Time, and Branches is just a pretty picture. Which is all its supposed to be, baby. They told you do something that invokes calm and youve done that. I have to tell you to me thats a much harder thing to do than it is to be controversial.
I dont think Ill have to but if I feel like I need to I will.
Thats
my girl.
God,
Francis. Maybe I should dress up for you more often. Francis laughed, and then she stuck her lip out in a pout. Of course I was under the impression that you always wanted to fuck me. I do, but I can usually control myself. When you get all dressed up, though, you just have such confidence. You know youre the hottest thing in the room and you just carry yourself differently. It has nothing to do with the two inch stiletto heels. I didnt say that. They pulled up to the front of the building and a valet took their car to park it. When they walked into the lobby there were already a few people there. Billy practically ran up to them. Damn, girl, you out did yourself, he said, pointing to the mural. Thank you, she said, taking his offered hand and shaking it. She could see that a big red ribbon separated the lobby from the actual wing and she supposed they planned to do some sort of ribbon-cutting ceremony. Hey boys! Heres the artist, he called out, and the next thing she knew a television news crew was in her face. Just sort of pushing and pulling her where they wanted her to stand. Then the news man was asking her a question. Ms. Bar, what was the inspiration for this painting? I dont like to be told what to paint. I asked the board what they wanted the painting to do and overwhelmingly they wanted the painting to evoke a feeling of calm. I had done a similar painting for a friend. Plants are very calming, and trees give a since of strength as well. I also wanted you to feel comforted by the painting so I painted it as if you were lying on the ground looking up into the canopy of the tree. Its sheltering you, protecting. Its sunny on the other side and through the tree you can make out a blue, nearly-cloudless sky, There are no sharp edges to the painting, its round, which centers the piece and gives it balance. She looked at Francis, smiled and said, A wise woman once said it can be easier to paint something that provokes strong emotion than something that is calming. The head of the new unit said you waived half your normal fee for doing this a painting as a donation to the cardio ward. Across the room she saw Willard winking and just wanted to slap him. No doubt hed told the board she wanted a hundred and forty thousand dollars but would do it for seventy thousand as a donation. I ah believe strongly in having good health care in the area. Willard gave her the OK sign and she shook her head, smiling.
What can
we expect from Ill probably have a couple of drinks, get too loud Hell, I might sing something. Francis laughed at her. I meant your next art project, the reporter said, smiling.
Im
actually supposed to do a mural in the Old Town Mall district on the west wall of the
Klondike building,
Well
all be looking forward to seeing that one next. He looked at the camera. "Weve
been talking to
Im
sorry, Its time, he said, shrugged, and dragged his crew off to do something else.
You know, girl, contrary to what you think that isnt the way most people start a pleasant conversation. He grabbed her and hugged her and she hugged him back. The games all about bullshit, hon. Youre no good at it, so someones got to do it for you. Besides, as much money as you made this year youre going to need that seventy-thousand dollar tax deduction. I just I dont know, Willard. I just feel like a phony.
You dont
get much more real than that. Willard pointed at the painting. Youre the
real deal, Oh fuck, its Halley again. Halley? Willard asked, smiling at the disgust in her voice. That bitch, Francis hissed in a whisper.
Willard,
Katie. Halley air kissed their checks then turned to
Halley.
So, Halley, wheres John? Willard asked pointedly.
In the
hospital. Nothing serious, pneumonia they think, Halley said, sounding disappointed.
She looked at Francis, then back at
Unless I
dont know her at all my little woman is
about ten seconds from scratching your eyes out of your head,
Halley seemed to
remember Willard and Katie then, and she turned to them and smiled. When John gets
out of the hospital we should all do lunch. Then she walked away, mouthing at What the hell just happened? Willard asked with a laugh.
That
bitch, Francis said again. Then she was glaring at
I didnt
kiss her, How do you know Halley? Willard asked.
Too damn
well. The way she knows damn near every lesbian in this city, Francis hissed at Halleys a lesbian? Katie said in disbelief.
Well she
was when she slept with
Calm down,
baby, Dont tell me to calm down. Shes got one hell of a nerve, the little woman! Call her! What the fuck is that shit? I get so tired of running into your whores all the time. You cheating on Francis? Willard asked, and all hint of amusement had left his voice. In fact it was pretty obvious that he was getting up for kicking her ass.
No, God
no. I would never cheat on Franny, Honey, Katie said to Francis, you cant be jealous for the things she did before you were together.
Thats
right. Willard laughed, his mad over, looked at Its not funny, Francis said with a pout. Yes, it sort of is, Willard said. Willard! Katie rebuked.
Willard
shrugged; he hugged Francis and patted her back. Francis, let it go. Hell, youve
laid turds that looked better than Halley. Shes a bitch.
Ill
kick her ass if you want me to, honey, No one is kicking anyones ass, Katie said in her very best mother voice.
No, but
the next time she comes near you I want you to flat tell her not to touch you, or I by God
will make a scene. Francis seemed to have calmed down which made
Weve never actually had a fight. Weve come
close a couple of times but it hasnt happened which is good because for the two
seconds she was actually mad at me I felt like someone had kicked me in the gut.
Willard,
theres Tammy, Katie said.
Willard waved
wildly, trying to get Tammys attention, and Tammy and Milly walked into the lobby together,
and there was no missing Its like Stellas bedroom, only better, Milly said to Tammy. Ill have to take your word for it; Ive never been in Stellas apartment. It is wonderful, though, like you were lying on the ground looking up through a tree, Tammy said. Wow, there are a butt load of people here. Butt load, is that a standard or metric measurement? Milly asked, looking up at her with a smile. Standard I think, more than a mouth full not as much as a shit pot load, Tammy answered with a grin. Theres my mom and dad, come on. Milly followed Tammy across the crowded room where she could see Willard waving wildly. She smiled; he was a nice guy. What was more he was a really good Dad. Tammys parents hugged Tammy and then her mother clicked her tongue and said, Tammy, you couldnt you have dressed up a little bit. Its a new shirt, Tammy said with a smile. Hello Milly, Tammys father said, and then he was giving her a big hug and she hugged him back though she was a little surprised by how happy he was to see her. He finally let her go. You look fantastic. Thanks, Milly said with a smile. The coral looks very good on you; you have such a lovely complexion, Tammys mother said. Thanks. And suddenly she realized why they were being so nice to her; they thought she was Tammys date. She smiled, it didnt bother her, and in fact Well she guessed she sort of was Tammys date. She looked up at Tammyshe definitely didnt mind being linked to her. Dad why are there so many fucking people here? Tammy asked. Tammy your mouth, Katie clicked her tongue again. Lots of press. Willard shrugged. Must know something I dont. Of course Ive been so busy on my new water projects Ive been sort of out of the loop. I know Billy was all excited about something.
Attention,
attention! a man said, tapping on a glass. As president of the board of
directors of Thats Uncle Billy, Tammy whispered in her ear. He isnt really my uncle he just gets pissy if I dont call him Uncle Billy. Hes the leading heart specialist in the state.
Milly nodded.
Uncle Billy was going on and on about all the marvelous things the cardio unit
was going to do and then he was saying something about
They gave
What?
Francis asked. Then Uncle Billy was just going on and on and on. Old wind bag. Willard bent over and whispered in her ear, He could talk the ear off a gnat as my daddy used to say. Of course Im not going to complain too much. Im standing with the prettiest bunch of women in this room. Ive nearly gone to sleep three times, Milly said, turning to look at him. Then she realized why she liked him so much, because she liked Tammy so much and Tammy was just a female version of her father, like one of those people who just seemed to get all their DNA from one parent. Like her and her own father. You know I just realized how much Tammy looks like you. That good or bad? he asked her with a smile. Good, Milly said smiling back.
Finally it
looked like Uncle Billy was bringing his speech to a close. And now to
cut the ribbon Id like to introduce Fuck! Milly screamed out. Fortunately everyone was clapping and cheering so loud no one heard her except Tammys parents and all her friends, who just looked at her like shed grown another head. All that is except Adrian who moved up next to her and whispered in her ear. I didnt know. You all right? Im fine. Hell, he probably wont even recognize me, Milly whispered back. Parker Saint John walked out of wherever they had him hidden and took hold of the ridiculous fake scissors. Shortly before the birth of my first child my father died in this hospital of cardiac arrest. He wasnt much older than I am now. Hopefully this new unit will help save the lives of people like my father. At least his speech was brief. He cut the ribbon and people started moving into the hall. You want to go look? Tammy asked.
Not
really, Milly said. I mostly came to see No I dont care about seeing a bunch of rooms full of equipment to cut people up either. Milly was about to suggest they just go and then Tammy said, So lets hit the buffet and the bar while there arent many people here. Milly nodded. She didnt want to make anyone go. There was no cause for it. Wow, Parker Saint John! Pretty huge, huh? Although Im not sure screaming out Fuck! was exactly appropriate, Tammy said with a laugh over her shoulder as she walked towards the buffet. Milly just forced a smile and shrugged. They got some food and some champagne and went to sit down at a table. My dad went to high school and college with him. They used to be really tight but they had a falling out. Milly just nodded and picked at the food on her plate. You all right? Tammy asked. Yeah, Im fine, Milly said. She smiled and patted Tammys hand. You know what we should do? No, what should we do? Milly smiled. Tammy was suddenly so excited it was contagious. Lets grab Adrian and Francis when this is over and go to the Excel and go dancing. Dressed like this? Milly laughed out. Why not? You look fantastic and I know youre used to dancing in heels, Tammy said. Milly smiled back wickedly. But not with so many clothes on. You could always take them off, Tammy said. I wouldnt complain. I only do that for cash, baby. Ive got a pocket full. Milly laughed. Tammy was flirting with her and it made her feel good. Yeah, lets do go out, even if the newly weds dont want to go with us. We dont need a chaperone. Speaking of the newly weds, Adrian and Francis walked back in as if they were sneaking away from a very boring class came and sat down with them. Uncle Billy is talking in every room, Francis told them, making a face. At this rate it will take them four and a half hours just to look at the damn rooms and
Big deal,
Im fine. Why wouldnt she be? Tammy asked.
Adrian just
looked puzzled like maybe she couldnt believe that Milly hadnt just told Tammy
though it was obvious she hadnt told Francis either. Of course that was why people
told their secrets to
We want to
go to Excel after this, you guys want to go? Milly asked. She saw I think were just going to go home. Oh come on it will be fun, Tammy said, and obviously knowing why they werent going added, You guys can fuck and do anytime.
You guys
can still go you dont need a chaperon you know, You still want to go? Tammy asked Milly. Sure, Milly said and didnt know why she didnt say lets go now. She guessed the truth was she didnt really want to leave yet, that she wanted to see him almost as much as she didnt want to. Adrian and Francis went to get some food. Would you rather just go to a movie? Tammy asked. Dressed like this? Dancing makes more sense than the movies. Youre dressed like this you want to be seen not sit in the dark. Good, Tammy said. Milly could tell that Tammy knew there was something upsetting her and she should probably just tell her but she just couldnt form the words which was an odd place for Milly to be. Its not you, Tammy, you arent bothering me, Milly said. In fact you never bother me. You do realize that were on a date right? Tammy looked shocked. Is that why youre upset? Because Well we didnt call it a date and we dont have to. Its not like a real date. You just came with me and were going to go someplace together and thats not really a date. Milly laughed. What ever you say and no, thats not why Im upset. My father has been trying to call me all day and well now I know why and Before she could stumble through what she was trying to tell Tammy her parents showed up with plates of food and sat down. God damn, Willard said as his butt hit the seat. I dont know whats worse having to listen to Uncle Billy do everything but pull the electrical wiring out of the wall and explain it or watching that asshole Parker Saint John stand around with an air of utter self importance. They fought twenty years ago and Willard is still holding a grudge. Wont even watch one of his movies, Katie said with a smile. A man ought to act like a man, Willard mumbled.
Calm down,
Dad, youre going to give yourself a coronary, Tammy said with a laugh as
Francis and
Lucky were
in the cardiac unit. Between Dads mad
and
They are
mighty tight there, bud, Willard said, and let me say, Father, for God's sake, Katie said, but she was laughing.
Thank you
kindly sir,
Here comes
that fucking Halley.
If you
come near me again Im going to tell everyone we screwed! You know, kid, I think youre learning, Willard said. Milly just relaxed and started having a good time talking to her friends and Tammys parents. Bud is that you? a voice called from a few feet away. Milly immediately turned towards Tammy. You ready to go? Sure, let me just say goodbye to my parents. But of course that was right out because her parents were suddenly busy. Willard? Parker, Willard grated out, so he really didnt like him. Katie you look marvelous, Parker said. Thank you Parker, Katie said, you dont look so bad yourself.
Parker sat at
the table in a chair across from Willard. He looked at
Yes,
Id
love to have you do something in my home in Go away Parker, Willard said bluntly. We arent friends. Willard, come on, I cant believe youre still mad over a little fight we had over twenty years ago. I dont think it was a little fight, Willard hissed across the table. You want to leave your wife thats one thing but you dont leave your kids behind. I did not abandon my kid. I paid every penny of child support and then some. Well excuse me. I thought being a father was more than just giving sperm and money. Milly looked across the table at Adrian who was just grinning. Then she looked right at Milly and said loud enough for everyone at the table to hear, You just gottah love Willard.
Quit
making a scene, Katie whispered to Willard, and caught Parker got up. Everyone I know except you has screwed up, Willard. He started to walk away, and then Tammy said, Dad, Mom, Milly and I are going to go. Milly could have slapped her. Milly! Parker exclaimed turning around. Hi Dad, Milly said with a helpless grin. He came back and hugged her, ignoring Willard as he exclaimed something to do with Parker not even recognizing his own kid, at which point Katie grabbed Willard and pulled him away from the table. Milly hugged her dad. He pushed her to arms length. My God, Milly, youre beautiful! Ive been calling you all day. He smiled his Oscar Award winning smile. Youre here so I guess you got my message.
No I didnt
check my messages today, she said, thinking that if shed listened to them this
wouldnt have happened. Im here for
And this
must be Marcella, he said, reaching out a hand to Tammy. Tammy just looked at his
hand, not knowing what to do as across the table No you giant ass. Marcella was killed in the war five months ago.
And then Francis
was pulling Oh honey, Parker said, sounding sincere but he was an actor so who knew what he really felt. Im so sorry. Why didnt you call me, tell me? I would have been here. But you couldnt come meet her, Dad. You couldnt come meet her when I asked you to. Im so sorry, Milly, he said again. Hollow words falling on her broken heart. She swallowed her tears. Im all right, Milly said. She forced a smile and pointed at Tammy. This is Tammy; shes Willard and Katies daughter. Her father smiled looking at Tammy. I should have known, she looks just like her old man, and from the set of her jaw Id say shes just as unforgiving. Milly Id like to spend some time with you while Im in town. All right, Milly said with obvious trepidation. I could come by your place in the morning, see where you live, we could talk. All right. She gave him her address. Someone called out to him from across the room. Ive got to go. Ill see you in the morning and again Im so, so sorry. Milly, Im sorry, Tammy said at her shoulder as Milly watched her father walk away. Me and my big mouth You didnt know. Besides, if I really didnt want to see him I would have left as soon as I fucked. She turned and smiled at Tammy. I wanted to see him. Hell, I havent seen him in years. I always want to see him. I always think it will be different and he always disappoints. You just want to go home? No. I still want to go out with you, Milly said, and she meant it. She didnt want to go home to her empty apartment and either bury herself in her writing or stare at the walls trying to figure out what shed say to her father when they talked. Worse yet try to write what he was going to say to her which was a writers curse. It was why she was always so disappointed in nearly everything because it was never as good as she had written it in her head. So your mom is Anne Lawrence, the country western singer whose entire fan base is the right side of the right wing. Who has consistently backed political candidates who vote against gay rights and abortion and who put millions of dollars behind this fucking bastard whos in power now and who sent Marcella to her death, so Hate Mommy, and that... she pointed to where her father was talking to some other idiot, laughing as if he hadnt just heard that his daughter had lost her partner a few months before. thats the good parent. You have Joanna, Tammy reminded gently, and Milly smiled. Yes, I have Joanna. Come on; lets blow this popsickle stand. I still have to tell my parents Im leaving. Because they were good parents and Tammy was a good daughter. Milly went with her and as soon as Willard saw her he said, Honey, I am so sorry. I just had no idea. If I had known I wouldnt have just gone on and on and Well I guess I did even when I did know and Im just sorry. Its all right Dad. Milly hugged his neck. She let him go then hugged Tammys mother, too. Mom, Dad were going, Tammy said. Where you going? Willard asked curiously. Ah dancing, Tammy said, sounding almost embarrassed. Have a good time and be careful, and Milly I really am sorry for what I said about your daddy. Milly leaned in towards him in a conspiratorial way, No, Im sorry. Youre right about my daddy. He patted her back. As they walked away Milly reached over without thinking and took Tammys hand and Tammy held hers tightly, looking down at her and smiling. Theyre holding hands, Francis said
excitedly.
Dont
match make, Im not, Francis said.
That was unbelievable, and Why didnt you tell me that Millys father was Parker Saint John? The same reason you dont run around telling everyone that Tammys parents are rich. Milly doesnt want people to know probably for a similar reason. People will treat her differently, theyll be phony with her and because of that, she pointed her thumb at Parker, she doesnt like phony people. But Im your wife, Adrian. Yes, and if I thought it was important for you to know Id have told you. She took her hands and held them. Do we have to stay here or can we go, too? Lets just go say goodbye to Mom and Dad.
They went to say
goodbye to Tammys parents and Willard laughed, Because I showed my ass? Yeah. Willard laughed. Yeah, well you didnt do a half bad job yourself. Eccentric artist, Adrian explained.
As they were
walking out of the building she threw her arm around Franciss shoulders. Francis
smiled up at her and put her arm around They liked my fucking painting. How could they not, baby? You know I didnt even ask you. Do you want to go to the club, Franny? Ive been sharing you with a whole room full of people all night. Id just as soon go home and have you all to myself. Then have me you shall.
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