Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded
like gunshots coming from
the brown house
Dispatcher: Do you have an
address?
Caller: No, I'm wearing a
blouse and slacks, why?
Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into
my house and took a bite out
of my ham and
Caller: I made a ham and
cheese sandwich and left it
on the kitchen
table
and when I came back from
the bathroom, someone had
taken a bite
Dispatcher: Was anything
else taken?
Caller: No, but this has
happened to me before, and
I'm sick and tired
Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
Fire or emergency?
Dispatcher: How can I help
you sir?
Caller: I was
wondering.....does the Fire
Dept. put snow chains on
their
Dispatcher: Yes sir, do you
have an emergency?
Caller: Well, I've spent the
last 4 hours trying to put
these chains on
my
tires and ....well.... do
you think the Fire Dept.
could come over
Dispatcher: Help you .......
what?
Caller: Help me get these
chains on my car!
Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
What is the nature of your
emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach
nine eleven, but my phone
doesn't have an
Dispatcher: This is nine
eleven.
Caller: I thought you just
said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am
nine-one-one and nine-eleven
are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old,
but I'm not stupid.
Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
What's the nature of your
emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant
and her contractions are
only two minutes
Dispatcher: Is this her
first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This
is her husband
Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
What's your emergency?
Caller: Yeah, I'm having
trouble breathing. I'm all
out of breath.
Darn... I think I'm going to
pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are
you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone.
North and Foster. Oh, man!
Dispatcher: Sir, an
ambulance is on the way. Are
you an asthmatic?
Dispatcher: What were you
doing before you started
having trouble
Caller: Running from the
police.