First Date
Eric lying on the couch watching TV, when Donna enters and sits on Eric.
ERIC: Oooof! Hey, get off me, you moose.
DONNA: What? Oh, Eric, I didn't see you there. You should really work on bulking up.
Donna and Eric tickle and pinch each other until they end up on the floor. A moment later Fez, Kelso and Hyde enter.
FEZ: Hey, look, Gilligan. (RE: Eric and Donna) What are you doing on the floor?
HYDE: Hey, you two, get a room.
ERIC: We have a room. It's called "my basement."
ERIC: Uh, hey, I'll walk you home.
KELSO: She lives right next door, man.
ERIC: Yeah.
Eric slaps Kelso in the head before exiting.
ERIC: Oh, hey, Donna, speaking of tomorrow, I was thinking that maybe you and I could go out to dinner...for Valentine's Day?
DONNA: Well, Hyde asked me to study at the library.
ERIC: Yeah but you can study anytime.
DONNA: Ok. Yeah I'd love to.
ERIC: Then it's a...a date.
DONNA: Our first.
ERIC: We're going out for dinner tomorrow night. Valentine's Day
HYDE: Uh, no, no, no. Donna and I are studying at the library tomorrow night. Hey, I didn't know it was Valentine's Day when I made the date. To study.
ERIC: Well I'm just sure she just forgot about you.
HYDE: We just talked about it a minute ago.
ERIC: Women, you know. Anyway, guys, I'm gonna give Donna my class ring.
HYDE: Yeah I had a show and I didn't take it. And once she takes Forman's ring, they're going out. And it would be really scummy to hit on her then. Not that I wouldn't. It would just be scummy.
FEZ: If you do not tell Donna how you feel, you will regret it.
HYDE: I'm going to The Vineyard.
KITTY: I don't know what why they call it fondue. They should call it fundue. 'Cause it's fun.
KITTY: No, no, no, Bob! That's a fon-don't. Don't put your hand in the hot oil.
DONNA: (drunk) Here, chicken, chicken, chicken!
ERIC: Donna, please. Shhh.
DONNA: (quietly) Oh, sorry.
Eric notices now that Donna is acting weird.
ERIC: Donna, are you okay?
DONNA: I'm great!
ERIC: I think you're drunk.
DONNA: Oh, my god, I think I am too. How could I be drunk?
WAITER: Well, there's about five shots of alcohol in a Long Island Iced Tea.
ERIC: Long Island Iced Tea?
WAITER: Yeah, well, you guys ordered drinks.
DONNA: And I'm ready for another one!
ERIC: No, she's not. No. Thank you. No, thank you, thanks.
DONNA: I love your little butt, Eric. It's so little!
ERIC: (embarrassed) Uh ok.
DONNA: And you're so good, Eric. You're so darn good.
ERIC: Donna, do you want some coffee?
DONNA: You're so good, it's make me hot.
ERIC: Or maybe another Long Island Iced Tea?
DONNA: Sing to me. Sing me a song, Eric.
ERIC: I don't think...
DONNA: Do it or I'll scream!
ERIC: (Loudly sings) Move it in, move it out. Shove it in, shove it out, Disco lady!
Red, Midge, Bob and Kitty are all still eating fondue but keep buring themselves repeatedly.
RED: Crap!
KITTY: Ouch!
BOB: Damn!
MIDGE: Owww!
RED: Geez!
KITTY: Shoot!
MIDGE: Yeow!
BOB: God, my eye!
Eric and Donna still at the restuarant.
DONNA: (very drunk now) It's so crowded in here. Eric, meet me under the table!
She starts to head under the table.
ERIC: No. (considers) No. Donna. I'm gonna get you some coffee.
He pulls her back into her seat.
DONNA: Hey, people the chicken is excellent.
DONNA: Look, Eric. Hyde's here. Hydee, Hydee, Hydeee.
ERIC: Hey, man, we're on a date.
HYDE: Well, you shouldn't be, because we were supposed to be at the library, man.
ERIC: Look, if she wanted to be at the library, she would be at the library.
DONNA: (feeling sick) Oh, my god.
ERIC: "Oh, my god?' What do you mean, (realizing) "Oh my god.
Donna runs off to the rest room.
ERIC: When my date is done puking you'd better not be here!
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