She sat down next to Chandler and he handed her her cup. She rewarded him with a kiss on the lips. Then they both sat back on the couch and stared on the TV set as if it was an open fire, both feeling that they didn’t need to say anything at the moment.

"So how do you feel?" Chandler finally asked, sipping his gl�gg.

"I’m fine" Monica said. She smiled slightly. "It’s amazing what a little change of environment can do."

"There’s no place like home" Chandler said with a nod. "And it’s not really home when you’re away."

Monica smiled slightly and put her cup down. She looked around in the room and felt happier than she’d felt in a long time. Her room in the hospital was so depressing, being back home again was the best thing she could have gotten for Christmas.

"It’s so great to have you back home for a few weeks" Chandler said, sharing her thoughts. "You’re mine and Regina’s favourite present this year."

Monica smiled at him and told him she had thought something similar herself. Chandler smiled and gave her a kiss. Then he finished his gl�gg and started chewing on an almond that was left in his cup.

"You know something that’s strange?" Monica asked, and continued without waiting for a reply. "I don’t feel as sick here as I do in the hospital, even though I’m not better at all."

"You get sicker from the treatment than you get from the disease itself." Chandler told her. "At least the treatment makes you feel allot sicker."

"That’s one of the reasons why I always feel so bad there" Monica said thoughtfully. "I know it’s the treatment that mostly makes me throw up and makes me feel like I do… And even though it’s to save my life it’s not making it any easier right now. It makes it kinda’ hard to trust the doctors and feel comfortable in the hospital."

"Why don’t you look at it this way…" Chandler said, filling up his cup again and throwing some raisins in the cup. "It’s more important that you’re alive a year from now than that you feel better than you do right now. The treatment is worth it."

"Yes, but what if it’s not?" Monica asked, sipping from her cup. "I mean, what if this treatment is all in vain? What if, what if… What if I die, Chandler?"

Chandler frowned. He hated to think about it.

"I mean, then I’ve had nothing in return for putting up with this. Without the treatment it would have been allot easier, I’m sure!"

"Your reward would be knowing that at least you tried!" Chandler said. "How would you feel on your deathbed knowing that you might have survived if you’d agreed on going through the treatment? How would you feel knowing you’d given up on your life? And how do you think I would feel?"

Monica said nothing for a while. She knew he was a bit upset now, and the last thing she wanted to do was to fight. She only had ten days with him at home and she wanted to make the most out of them.

Chandler was also quiet. He’d said a bit more than he’d intended to, but she was scaring him now. He’d always believed in her inner strength and her fighting spirit. He couldn’t take her giving up just like that.

He finished his second cup and then rose to clean the table. Monica sat back on the couch and finished her cup slowly. She tried to think of something to say to make the mood less uncomfortable. She didn’t want to go to sleep if he was annoyed or upset with her. She wanted to go to sleep and snuggle close to him and to realize just how lucky she was right now.

Chandler grabbed her cup and washed it along with the other dishes. Then he went back to the couch and sat down with Monica again, but neither of them said anything. Chandler looked at the time and saw that it was quite late, and they should be heading for bed soon. Knowing Regina they wouldn’t get to sleep to any later hours than six in the morning.

"Come on" he said, rising. He reached out his hand to her and pulled her to her feet. "Let’s call it a night now, okay?"

When she’d gotten into bed Monica just couldn’t resist. She rolled over to Chandler’s side and softly placed her head on his shoulder and her arm across his chest. She sighed in contentment and breathed in the scent from his warm skin.

"You’re starting to scare me Monica" she heard him say. "When you say things like what you said earlier you scare me!"

"What do you mean?" Monica asked.

"You’re a fighter and you’re a survivor. I can’t believe that you seem to be doubting that yourself! You can’t give up, especially not this soon, do you understand me Monica?" Chandler said forcefully.

"I don’t want to give up, but you have no idea what this is like!" she defended herself.

"Of course I don’t!" Chandler replied. "How could I possibly know what you were going through? But you don’t have any idea what it’s like to see someone you love so much being sick! It breaks my heart, Mon. And when you talk about giving up after just a month I get scared! I’m scared to death! Don’t you realize that you’ve gotta fight? If you leave it all up to the doctors you’re not gonna live to see next Christmas!"

Monica rolled away from him.

"Mon, I’m sorry..." Chandler said, regretting his words. "I, I didn’t mean it like that!"

"Leave me alone!" Monica said, turning her back against him and feeling very sorry for herself.

Chandler looked at her and felt sad. He had her back for just a few days, and he didn’t want to waste them. But now he would have to spend at least one of them without holding her in his arms. He felt like biting his tongue off for saying what he had said. The last part had been very unnecessary.

"So…" Chandler said the next morning, sitting down by the kitchen table where Monica was feeding Regina. "Are we going to spend this Christmas being on bad terms with each other, or are we going to make the most of it? I’m really sorry about last night."

"I overreacted" Monica said.

"Well, I don’t blame you" Chandler said. "I was way out of line."

"Be that as it may, we don’t need to get hung up on that. I think we should try not to fight and to make the most out of this week and a half."

Chandler smiled and kissed her forehead.

"That was just the answer I was hoping for."

"By the way…" Monica said. "Regina said another word just about two minutes ago, when you were in the shower."

"Was it ‘daddy’?" Chandler asked hopefully.

"No" Monica said with a chuckle, shaking her head. "It was ‘spoon’."

"Hey, who’s side are you on?" Chandler accusingly said to Regina, then he laughed to show he was only joking. "So how are you feeling Mon?"

"Sick, as usual" Monica said. "But not too sick. It’s kind of like having a cold… Only my throat and my nose is okay."

Chandler rose and started to fry eggs. Joey, who always seemed to be able to smell food cooking, entered and declared that he would like something to eat.

"Joey, you’ve got a full fridge right across the hall" Monica pointed out.

"I know, but it’s full of Rachel’s gross protein food."

"Protein food?" Chandler echoed.

"Yeah. Vegetables and things like that. She insists on drinking carrot juice every morning." Joey looked disgusted.

"You know, I did that almost every day when I was pregnant" Monica said with a laugh.

"And I was scared" Chandler added with a sarcastic smile.

"So what’s for breakfast?" Joey said, sitting down. "Just eggs?"

"You’re gonna have to fry ‘em yourself, Joe…" Chandler said, putting a plate of eggs in front of Monica. "Mon and I are going out shopping as soon as we’re done eating. And since you were the first one to show up this morning you’re gonna get the glorious honour of baby-sitting."

Chandler soon started wondering if going shopping had been such a good idea. They’d only been to three outlets and Monica was already looking tired and exhausted.

"Hey Mon, what do you say we go have some lunch?" Chandler suggested, hoping that some food would make her feel better.

"Sure…" Monica said, shrugging her shoulders. "I’m not that hungry, though."

"I am" Chandler lied, and dragged her with him to the nearest fast-food restaurant.

"It’s strange how much you can miss pepperoni pizza…" Monica mused shortly after when they’d gotten their food.

"Maybe that’s because hospital food is gross."

"Maybe." Monica rolled her eyes. "With any luck they’ll be feeding me intravenously soon."

Chandler chuckled and rolled his eyes as well. "Until they do I could start smuggling pizza and hamburgers with me each time I come. You know, hide it Regina’s little bag or something. They’ll never suspect a child for such a serious crime."

Monica chuckled again and took another slice. "You don’t think they’ll be able to smell it?" she asked.

"I’ll claim it’s some new after shave I’m using." Chandler said, pretending to be dead serious.

Monica smiled half-heartedly and then made a face. Chandler eyed her, she knew he did, so she smiled again and reached for another slice. But as soon as she’d started eating on it she realized she wasn’t the least bit hungry. In fact she was nauseous. And her head ache wouldn’t faze out, even though she’d taken a pain pill that morning.

"You okay there, Mon?" Chandler asked.

"Fine" Monica assured him, though neither of them bought it.

"You… gonna eat that?" Chandler asked, gesturing to the pizza slice in her hand.

"Oh honey, I don’t think I want to…" Monica said, feeling like a child who didn’t want to finish supper.

Chandler said nothing, he just reached over the table, grabbed the slice and finished it off himself.

"You know, maybe we should head back home" Monica said, not looking at him. She knew he’d looked forward to spending the day with her, out shopping, but she didn’t want to be anywhere else than home right now.

"Okay…" Chandler agreed. "Just let me finish eating, okay?"

Monica gave him a smile and hoped he’d eat up his lunch soon.

"Monica…" Chandler said, sitting down next to Monica on their bed. Monica looked up from the book she was reading.

"What’s up?" she asked.

"How are you feeling?"

Monica felt a little annoyed. She didn’t want people to constantly ask her how she was doing. She’d been home for three days now, and she’d gotten the questions far more times than she’d wanted. But she saw the look in Chandler’s eyes, and she felt sorry for him. He looked very concerned and she saw allot of love in his eyes.

"I…" she began, but realized she didn’t know what to tell him. "Chandler that’s relative" she said. "Giving the circumstances I’m just fine… But if I’d been well I would’ve told you differently."

"Head aches?" Chandler asked.

"And some nausea."

"It’ll pass…" Chandler said with a smile, and placed his hand on her forehead. "You feel a little warm, but if you’ve got a fever it’s not a high one."

Monica smiled slightly, and went back to her book.

Chandler eyed her discreetly. He wished she would talk to him, open up a little. She seemed to want to hide all of her emotions inside, and that worried Chandler. He knew what great affect psychic well-being had on physical health, and if she would vent her worries and her pain it would make it easier for her.

‘I don’t understand why she feels she has to keep it all to herself’ Chandler thought. ‘Not when she’s got so many people here that she can talk to.’

"Did you want anything else?" Monica asked, looking up from her book.

"Well, this is my bedroom too…" Chandler said. "I just felt like hanging out here."

"Practically sitting on me?" Monica asked with a raised eyebrow. Then she laughed and kissed him on the forehead. "Not that I mind, but it might get a little tight on space…"

Chandler smiled and kissed her back. "Scoot!" he said.

"Okay…" Monica replied, scooting over on the bed. Chandler lay down next to her on the side she’d been on earlier.

"Oh, and get rid of the book!" Chandler said.

"Excuse me, I’m reading!" Monica said, pretending to be offended.

"Honey, you’ve read ‘The Tommyknockers’ about three times already. Just in the past months. You should know the dialogue by heart by now!"

Before she could reply Chandler leaned over and snatched the book. He threw it on the floor and gave her a kiss.

"Now how about you devote a little time to me, huh?" he said. "Hey Chandler, where’s Regina?" Monica asked.

"Do you always answer a question with a question?" Chandler joked.

"Do you actually know where she is?"

"Of course I do, sweetie!" Chandler said, almost offended. "She’s with Phoebs in the living room, playing with Lego."

"It’s past her bedtime" Monica pointed out. "She should be in bed by eight. And it’s almost nine."

Chandler sighed and got out of bed. He went out in the living room to get Regina ready for bed.

Monica followed shortly after, having put ‘The Tommyknockers’ away carefully before she went out in the living room. She sat down with Phoebe for a while, talking on the couch, before Chandler exited the bathroom with Regina.

"Okay, say goodnight to mamma and goodnight to Phoebe" he said. "And while you’re at it, say goodbye to me too. Daddy." The last word was said instructionally.

"Mommy!" Regina said.

"I think my daughter hates me" Chandler said to the women on the couch, rolling his eyes.

Monica laughed and took Regina from Chandler, carrying her into the nursery. Chandler slumped in the couch next to Phoebe.

"You know…" Phoebe said, "today is December 24th, you’ve got your wife home for a little more than a week from today, and yet you look like it’s the day before the earth perishes."

Chandler gave her a look. "Phoebs, can’t I have a rough day anyway?"

"I figured you’d be too thrilled to have time with anything like that!" Phoebe commented.

"I am thrilled!" Chandler said. "But I’m also scared. I mean, you know how I feel about Mon! Seeing her like this isn’t exactly a picnic. And it’s not just the physical disease, it’s… well… She’s acting a bit differently."

"Chemo therapy?" Phoebe suggested.

"No, I don’t think it’s the treatment…" Chandler said. "But it’s like she’s given up. Or like she’s about to give up. And she knows I’d react, well, badly to say the least if she gave up. And it’s like she’s trying to hide it from me. But she knows she can’t ‘cause we know each other too well, so it’s as if she…" "As if she what?" Phoebe asked.

"Well, it’s kinda’ as if she wants to keep me on a distance or something."

Phoebe opened her mouth to reply, but Monica exited the nursery so she couldn’t.

"She went to sleep fast, huh?" Phoebe said, rising. "Goodnight, you two!"

"Goodnight!" Monica said as Phoebe left. She turned to Chandler. "What do you say Bing, should we call it a night too? I’m kinda’ tired."

"I’ll be right there" Chandler assured her.

Monica yawned and stretched out in bed, even though doing so made her whole body ache. Chandler smiled slightly and lay down next to her.

"I’m telling ya’…" Monica said. "Nothing’s as nice as getting to go to bed in your own bed with your hubby."

Chandler shook his head, chuckling. "Y’know, I never expected to be called ‘hubby’…" he said.

"Well, I thought I’d get back at you for calling me ‘the Mrs.’" Monica said.

Chandler made a face and turned the lights off. Monica rolled over and put her arm around him.

"I’m gonna miss having you as a pillow when I go back to the hospital…" she mumbled.

"Yeah, I bet it’s hard to sleep without your head resting on something hard and bony" Chandler sarcastically said, placing a kiss on her head.

"Well the hospital pillows smell so… hospital-y!" Monica said, sounding tired. "I prefer it when it smells--"

"Chandler-y?"

"Yeah" Monica said with a chuckle.

"I know you must hate me asking this all the time, but are you feeling all right?"

"Yeah… I feel better now than I did earlier. I don’t feel so nauseous… And it looks like the pain pill’s finally starting to work."

"That’s good" Chandler said, kissing her on the head again.

"Very good…" Monica mumbled, and returned the kiss, only kissing him on the shoulder instead of the head. She kissed him on the neck and breathed in his scent. "They should put this smell on a bottle" she mumbled.

"Who’d ever buy that?" Chandler asked with a frown.

"I would."

Chandler held back a comment. He slowly stroke her hair with his right hand, and her back with his left.

"Just stay away from the small of my back, okay?" Monica mumbled. "That part hurts."

"That’s ‘cause that’s where you’re sick."

Monica looked up at him, all of a sudden with tears in her eyes. "Chandler I don’t wanna be sick!" she said, starting to cry.

"I know honey, I know…" Chandler whispered and kissed her on the forehead. "I’d trade with you in a second, just so you wouldn’t have to go through it."

Monica cried harder at that comment, instead of calming down like Chandler had hoped.

"Easy, girl…" he whispered and kissed her on the nose. Then he dried off her tears and kissed her on the lips.

Monica kissed him back, hungrily. Chandler stuck his tongue in her mouth, and Monica happily let him. It had the same affect on her as a pacifier had had on Regina when she was an infant, it made her slowly stop crying.

Chandler ended the kiss when she stopped crying, and smiled at her. "I guess it’s true that actions are better than words" he joked.

Monica rolled her eyes and kissed him again. She allowed herself to really sink into the kiss, knowing that they wouldn’t get to kiss like this for weeks or even months as soon as she was back at the hospital.

Chandler let his hands slide under her t-shirt, carefully. He was very unsure of weather or not she’d want to have sex or make out more seriously, or even if she should be doing it or not. "Mon, is this okay with you, or should we let this end at some kisses?" he mumbled with his lips by hers.

She answered by slipping her hand into his boxers.

"I love it when we let actions speak for us…" Chandler said with a slight giggle, and pulled her t-shirt off. "But I have to admit that the words aren’t always too bad either."

"I love you" Monica whispered in his ear.

"That is a clear example of when the words are great!" Chandler replied, and kissed her on the neck. "I love you too, Monica."

"I know you do."

Monica sat up in bed, coughing. Chandler woke up with a start, and turned to her.

"Honey? Honey what’s going on? Are you all right?" he asked.

Monica shook her head. She couldn’t talk for the cough attack.

"Honey!" Chandler exclaimed. He sat up and scooted closer to her, casting a glance on the clock. It was around four am. He reached down to the foot of the bed and grabbed her t-shirt, pulling it over her head. Then he put his boxers back on. The whole time Monica was coughing.

"How come you’re coughing, this can’t be good!" Chandler said, scared. "You’re not supposed to cough as a result of the treatment or the disease, are you?"

Monica shrugged her shoulders, and her coughing ceased. She took a deep breath since she hadn’t been able to breathe while she was coughing, but the deep inhalation started another cough attack.

Chandler was getting more and more scared. He put his arm around her, not knowing what to do to help her. Monica all of a sudden got out of bed, and hurried for the door. Chandler hurried after her.

Monica ran into the bathroom, where the couch attack made her throw up.

"My gosh, you haven’t come down with whooping cough, have you?" he asked, feeling his heart beating heavily in his chest.

"Had it" Monica croaked. She couched again, but this time it wasn’t a whole series of coughs.

Chandler reached over to one of the mugs she kept in the bathroom and filled it with water, handing it to her. "Here, drink this."

She greedily drank the water and Chandler filled it up for her again. She finished four mugs before she coughed again. "Thanks" she said, handing the mug back to Chandler. She whipped the water from her mouth.

"You okay now?" he asked, trying to get his heart to slow down to it’s normal pace.

"I’ll be all right."

"No more coughing?"

"How should I know?" Monica walked towards the door. "If I start coughing again maybe I can borrow your tongue again… sucking on something helps."

"Then let me suggest you suck on a mint" Chandler said. "I might have germs that I spread to you."

"Chandler we had sex tonight, what germs that you have can you possibly give me, than those you already have?" Monica replied, walking back to the bedroom.

Chandler took a deep breath and drank a mug full of water himself. He all of a sudden felt very guilty for sleeping with her earlier on. What had he been thinking? He knew her immunise system was down, he shouldn’t risk passing things on to her. And he couldn’t help but wonder if her cough attacks was a result of something he’d passed over to her.

He walked back into the bedroom, where Monica was under the covers, trying to get warm.

"You cold?" Chandler asked, concerned.

"A little… Come warm me!"

Chandler got into bed and pulled her close. He could feel goose bumps on her arms and started to rub them.

"I’m so tired…" Monica said, sounding like she was about to cry. "And I’m so tired of feeling like this… I can never find a comfortable position to lay in, I feel so weak… And yet this is just part one."

Chandler was quiet.

"Chandler why do I feel like this? Why do I still feel nauseous, they’ve taken a rest with the treatment!"

"Honey it takes a while for heavy medication to get out of your system…" Chandler said.

Monica kept quiet. She realized she was probably sounding very whiny, and she didn’t want Chandler to get sick of listening to her. She had never before felt sorry for herself, it wasn’t her style. But she did now, and that made things even more difficult for her.

"Actually, you know what?" Chandler asked. "It’s pretty unusual from what I understand that you feel like this after just the first round of treatments. Most people don’t start feeling bad until after at least a few!"

"How delightful" Monica said, still shivering. She wasn’t the least bit encouraged by that. She knew he might have been out to make her feel a little better, in some weird way, but right now she didn’t feel like being nice to him by pretending that he’d succeeded. She was getting tired of his comments and his worried questions. And right now all she wanted to do was go to sleep, and that made her feel tired of him in general. But he was trying to warm her up, she’d asked him to, so she couldn’t roll away from him.

A tear fell down her cheek, and she hoped he wouldn’t notice. She was too tired to make up an excuse for it, and she was way too tired to be comforted. She found herself wishing she could be all by herself and cry without anyone trying to comfort.

She realized that she hadn’t been alone for more than an hour or two since she got admitted to the hospital. One of her friends had always been there with her, and she appreciated it. Most of the time she wanted someone to be there with her, someone to cheer her up and to keep her mind off things. If she was alone she’d probably just start to feel sorry for herself, but she didn’t have time to think about stuff like that when her friends were around. And having Chandler there was always the best. Every time she opened her eyes after sleeping she hoped she’d see him in her room. And each time she fell asleep when he was there she hoped he would still be there when she woke up. But tonight all she wanted to do was get out of their bed and go find some place where she could sleep by herself.

Chandler noticed she was a bit warmer now and stopped rubbing her arms. He put his arms around her chest in a hug instead and kissed the back of her head. Then he let out a deep sigh and stared on the ceiling. He could feel her shiver a little, but he didn’t realize that it was the repressed tears that made her do so, not the fact that she was a little cold.

The next day was Christmas Day. Monica made an effort to be cheerful, merry and to have fun. The first few hours it was easy, but as the day went along it got harder.

The gang had decided to exchange gifts in the evening instead of the morning, so Monica knew she had to stick around until evening before she could excuse herself by saying she was tired. She didn’t feel very well and she had three more cough attacks. She saw the fear in Chandler’s eyes each time, and she felt thankful when he came and sat by her when she started to couch. She ended up throwing up because of the coughs once, and she saw in the corner of her eye when she hurried to the bathroom that Chandler dropped the plate he was drying and followed with her. She didn’t exactly know why he came with her at first. Then she heard him sit down, and she felt his hand stroking her back.

"Poor thing…" he said quietly. "Poor, poor thing…"

Monica felt oddly comforted by his small words. Last night it would have annoyed her, but now it only felt like a relief to hear him.

When she’d thrown up she turned to him and they hugged each other, slowly rocking.

"I love you" Monica whispered. "Thank you for being there."

But most of the time Monica sat on the couch with Regina in her arms. Regina wasn’t as frisky as usual, she nicely sat in her mother’s lap and watched cartoons. Disney’s "From all of us to all of you a Very Merry Christmas" was on, and she seemed completely amazed by the bits from some of Disney’s movies and some of the old classic Donald, Mickey, Pluto, Goofy and Chip and Dale cartoons. Monica watched too, but with less enthusiasm.

Joey and Phoebe joined them, not saying much. They thought Monica was awfully quiet, and her couch attack after dinner that lead to her throwing up had made them feel uncomfortable. They cast a glance at Chandler, who was acting like normal, and came to the conclusion that nothing serious could be the matter.

Chandler sat down next to Monica once he and Ross had finished doing the dishes, and lifted Regina over to his lap instead. The Disney show was over, and Phoebe had popped "It’s a Wonderful Life" in the VCR.

After the movie they decided to open the presents. Rachel declared that since Monica looked so tired it would be best to hand out the presents now, so Monica could go rest later if she liked.

Monica smiled slightly and wanted to come with a sarcastic remark on how Rachel probably just wanted her presents as fast as possible, but realized she was too tired. Regina crawled back into her lap again, and she kissed the child on the head and started rocking her slowly.

"You wanna get your presents now, sweetie?" she asked, trying to sound more awake than she was.

"I want presents" Regina said, waving her bunny around. Everybody stopped what they were doing, realizing that she formed her first real sentence.

"Where’s a camera when you need one?" Joey said, while Monica and Chandler gave Regina kisses and hugs and told her she was a good girl, while Regina excitedly waved her bunny and lost grip of it.

"Whoa, easy there, we wouldn’t wanna loose Mr. Bunny" Phoebe said and picked up the stuffed animal that had landed next to her. She handed it to Chandler, who placed it next to him on the couch.

Monica felt that the whole Christmas gift deal was done with forced cheerfulness. It was almost as if the others were too happy and merry for it to make any sense. She glanced at her wrist watch and hoped it would be over soon. The joy she had felt over being back home had soon vanished and been replaced by sorrow. She was still glad to be back home, but now she’d realized that no matter where she went right now, she would still feel very sick. She couldn’t escape the disease and she couldn’t escape the treatment and she couldn’t escape the consequences. The only thing she had a chance of escaping was death.

She kissed the top of Regina’s head lovingly and felt thankful she was holding her daughter this Christmas. And she was thankful that her husband sat next to her on the couch, giving her all of his wordless support and love. And she was thankful that her brother was sitting on the floor where the table had been. It was now moved away to make more room during Christmas Day. She was thankful that she had such a great connection with Ross, she loved him very much. And she was thankful for her three close friends who were there with her.

‘Gosh, this feels more like Thanksgiving’ she thought, and took the present Joey was handing her.

"This is for you, Gina" she said to her daughter, who seemed most interested in the strings that were around some of the presents. "Maybe your daddy will open it for you." Chandler took the present, giving Monica a kiss on the cheek. "This the one you got her?" he asked.

"Uh-hu."

Chandler opened the present and handed Regina a new stuffed animal.

"You know who this is?" he asked.

"It’s Dumbo" Monica told her, and Regina grabbed it by it’s ears and seemed to be pretending that it was flying.

"Maybe she recognizes him!" Rachel said with a smile. "I watched ‘Dumbo’ with her just about a week ago!"

"Umbo!" Regina said.

Once the others had left Chandler cleaned up the last boxes lying around. He picked up Regina’s bunny from the couch. "Looks like Mr. Bunny comes in second tonight" he remarked, and walked into the bedroom where Monica was putting Regina down for the night. She was hugging her Dumbo, already asleep, and Chandler carefully put the bunny down next to her.

Monica and Chandler walked out to the living room and sat down on the couch.

"Mon, I need to talk to you for a sec" Chandler said. Monica nodded. "Forgive me for bringing this up all the time, but you seem to be very ill. Even given your situation. You don’t look so hot at all!"

"I don’t feel very hot either…" Monica said, looking down on her socks. "Except for on my forehead…"

Chandler looked at her sadly. "Honey, I’ve gotta ask… Would you like to make this visit short? And return to the hospital earlier?"

"Yes" Monica said, in a squeaky voice as she started to cry. "Yes, I would like that… I can’t kid myself Chandler, I’d be much better off there where I at least know I’m doing something about this!"

Chandler pulled her into a hug and let her cry. Hopefully it would do her good to shed some tears. He tried to keep his own at bay. He wanted her to stay, he wanted so desperately to have her at home for another week, but he knew she wanted to go back to the hospital. And her wish was his command. He sighed in a shiver and pulled her closer.

"Happy Christmas honey."

"Merry Christmas Chandler…"