jokes2

JOKES PAGE 2

     EVERY TIME AN INDIAN ENTERED HIS CHIEF'S TENT, HE FOUND THE CHIEF MASTURBAING. THIS HAPPENED EVERYTIME AND SOON DEVELOPED INTO A PROBLEM. SO THE INDIANS GOT HIM A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, WHO MOVED IN WITH THE CHIEF. ONE DAY, AN INDIAN WALKED INTO THE TENT AND FOUND THE CHIEF MASTURBATIN AGAIN.
      "WHAT HAPPENED? WE GOT YOU A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN!!!"
      "HER ARM GOT TIRED."

     A MAN WALKS INTO A CLINIC BOW LEGGED. THE DOCTOR ASKS, "WHATS HAPPENED TO U? IT LOOKS LIKE YOUVE BEEN RIDING A HORSE FOR 4 DAYS!!"
      "PLEASE DOC, I GOT A CRICKET BALL UP MY ASS!!!"
      "HOW'S THAT?" ASKED THE DOC
      "OH DONT YOU START!!!!!"

    BOB HOPE WAS ON CILLA BLACK'S "SURPRISE SURPRISE", AND HE WAS BOASTING ABOUT HOW HE WAS 97 YEARD OLD AND STILL MANAGED TO HAVE SEX WITH 3 WOMEN EACH NIGHT. AT THE END OF THE SHOW, CILLA ASKED, "HEY BOB, DO YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ME TONIGHT???"
      "SURE THING! JUST COME OVER TO MY PLACE TONIGHT."
      AND SO SHE DID, AND THEY HAD GREAT SEX.
      "HEY CILLA, WE COULD HAVE EVEN BETTER SEX, BUT IVE GOT TO SLEEP FOR HALF AND HOUR, AND WHILST IM SLEEPING, YOUVE GOTTA PUT YOUR LEFT HAND ON MY LEFT BOLLOCK, AND YOUR RIGHT HAND ON MY RIGHT BOLLOCK. OK??"
      CILLA RELUCTANTLY AGREED, AND THEY DID HAVE EVEN BETTER SEX AFTER.
      "CILLA, IF YOU LET ME SLEEP FOR ANOTHER HALF HOUR, WE COULD HAVE EVEN ETTER SEX, BUT YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT YOU DID LAST TIME AGAIN. HOW ABOUT IT?"
      CILLA AGREED, AND THIS TIME THEY HAD EVEN BETTER SEX.
      "HOW DO YOU DO IT BOB? DO MY HANDS STIMULATE YOU WHILST YOU'RE SLEEPING?"
      "NO, BUT THE LAST TIME I SLEPT WITH A SCOUSER, SHE NICKED ME WALLET!"

     A MAN WALKS IN A RESTAURANT AND SEES A SIGN SAYING "UNIQUE BREAKFAST". AND WAS CURIOUS.
      " WAITRESS?? WHAT IS YOUR UNIQUE BREAKFAST?"
      " OH IT'S FRESH CHICKEN'S TONGUE."
      " URGHH! IM NOT EATING ANYTHING THATS COME OUT OF A CHICKEN'S MOUTH!!!"
      " WELL WHAT DO YOU WANT TO EAT THEN??"
      " JUST BRING ME SOME SCRAMBLED EGGS!"