(Written by Brett)
Ah, my first article. As your above-average highschool sophomore who spends more time observing than interacting with others, I took it upon myself to come up with a crazy chart of the highschool stereotypes I witness at the hellhole that is my school. Some stereotypes really fucking suck, while others are okay. If you fall into the category of one of the stereotypes that really fucking suck, then you really fucking suck. And should die. Bloody. If you disagree with anything I say or have a problem with it, I could care less, you see my email and AIM SN on the main page, feel free to send me hateful messages. I'll start with the ones that I hate first:
Stoners: Stoners really fucking suck. They mix and mingle with the other stereotype categories, so there are no solid stoners that stand out from all other stereotypes, except for hippies, but you can tell when someone is one. Stupidly enough, stoners ALWAYS talk about their adventures of getting high, almost getting caught getting high, and getting caught while getting high and barely remembering a thing. You'd think that if you have a drug problem or something, you'd hide it, not glorify it. "Man, I had a huge joint last night and I was so high that I felt like I was floating and spinning and puking all at once!" "Damn dude, my mom almost caught me last night when I lit up a cigarette in my room!" You get the idea. On top of that, they're slow, stupid, seemingly always sedated, make lousy grades while never doing schoolwork, and look horrible. And smokers, you can really smell cigarettes on them. But like I said, they exist among all the other stereotypes, so there's a huge number of them, but even if they do blend well, you can still tell. Sometimes just by the way they talk and their personalities!
Preps/Jocks: Preps and Jocks are in a category of their own because they're too much alike. Sporty girls date fellow jocks or preps, and it's vice versa with the guys. Preppy girls look down on everyone else, wear Abercrombie and Fitch and American Eagle clothes (exclusively,) are clean cut, gossipy, giggly, and just plain annoying. Jocks are obsessed with the sports that they play, hate all other sports, and rarely ever leave their groups of fellow jocks and preps. Sports to me are meaningless, just toned down versions of the bloody arenas of Ancient Rome. They also mainly listen to whatever is on MTV at the time. I can't associate with these people at all really, and even when I played soccer last year I couldn't. They're just annoying, and the most egotistical of all of the stereotypes. However, sometimes they will try to fit in with the punk-ish crowd in some way or another. They fail most of the time. More on that category later.
Goths: The so-called outsiders, yet not really outsiders at all. I really hate them. You've seen these freaks before. Black clothes, black makeup (yes, even the guys wear makeup and paint their fucking nails,) somber look, always hanging out in places like Hot Topic, claiming that no one likes them and that they hate the world, and some have drug problems and stuff too. Have they looked in a mirror and saw how horrible they look? All they are are darker emo kids wanting attention by cutting themselves and writing. Check out random DeadJournals or LiveJournals or other blogs, they litter the places and complain and whine mindlessly, never finding a solution to their "problems" and never caring about anything else other than their own depression. Cheer up, you fucking morons, smell the fucking roses and try wearing something a little more colorful for once! SMILE!! Of course, some Goths come from negligent families and such, but they number few.
Rednecks: Y'know, there were these two rednecks in my Art class who only wanted to paint hunting stuff and rebel flags, and rather than doing their work, they'd throw shit at me and Leif. I hated them with a passion, and still do. I hate rednecks, I hate everything about them. Rednecks, just like those nifty little goths, are very very easy to pick out. They too congregate in large groups, talking about 4-wheeling, hunting, fishing, country music, and the like. They never really participate in sports or other school-oriented things, speak in hideous accents, and wear either camoflauge shit or Wranglers jeans. They also do a lot of dipping of Skoal and stuff like that. They too are some of the most egotistical of all the stereotypes, and most arrogant as well. And they're racist too. And no one likes racists, except for the KKK, and they suck.
Poseurs: Yes, I just went there. Poseurs normally are a branch of Preps and Jocks and any other stereotype, trying to act like another stereotype. How can you tell if someone's a poser? Sometimes by the way they try to dress and act and you can tell it's just fake. Of course, most blonde prep girls ARE fake plastic Barbie dolls given life, but you get the idea. One thing that sticks out to me are the people who are Goth and stuff and hang out at Hot Topic, and buy John Deere clothing. Why do they do that? Because Hot Topic fucking carries John Deere clothes now, and the kids are like, "Well, if Hot Topic has it, then it MUST be cool!" Or people who wear shirts of some random band, but don't really listen to that band. They try to hang out with members of the stereotype that they try to copy, and sometimes they slip under the radar and are in a way accepted, but they're still Poseurs. Then there's also the white people who listen to rap and shit, which I hate. They're more associated with Jocks and Preps though, for some odd reason.
Punks/Emo Kids: Emo is like Goth, minus all the black and cutting and makeup. They're more closely associated with Punks, because Emo music derived from Punk. Emo kids are the overly emotional kids who listen to pop-punk stuff and can sometimes associate with Goths and Punks. These categories all overlap with each other in certain places, so writing this is a bit more difficult than you may expect. Punks are a bit more hardcore. Rather than whiney, they're pissed off and always support individuality. Though you can't be individual and come up with something new without being inspired by something currently existing. Punks have piercings, band t shirts, combat boots, wild hair, and listen to bands like Anti-Flag, Rancid, and Bad Religion. They really don't care much about their looks, so long as they stand out, and they're the ones more liable to get into fights and cause anarchy in the lunchroom or something. Oddly enough, there are few true Punks in my school, if any. Plenty of Emo-ish people though, or just crossovers of various stereotypes. I could be considered partially Punk in some ways, or just a Poseur because I'm a kid who once had long hair and now has a psuedo-mohawk.
Weirdos/Outsiders: These guys are more or less the true outcasts. They NEVER associate willingly with other stereotypes and stick to their own kind. It's somewhat due to their looks and behaviors and such, and their interests that never appeal to any other stereotype. You know that quiet kid who sits isolated in the classroom and does his work and nothing else and never really talks or anything? Yeah, he's probably one of them. I sometimes will fit into this category myself. Though I still don't know what interests they delve in or what common bond they have with each other. They're like enigmas or something. Their isolation keeps us from learning more. I sound like Steve Irwin, minus the accent and khaki shorts!
Goody-Goodys: No stone will be left unturned! Unless it's, you know, a really heavy boulder or has some poisonous snake hidden underneath that could kill me. I'm rambling. Goody-Goody's are sometimes associated with the Weirdos. They're pretty obvious, always sucking up to the teachers and fellow peers, making good grades, perfectly clean, neatly dressed and clean cut, you get the idea. Yeah, it's kinda ugly, isn't it? They're really quite bland. Of course, it's a good thing that they are this way because they're the ones who will be running the world later on, and we don't want a Stoner commanding our military forces or Punks running the government, now do we? At least they don't do drugs, this is the single category that Stoners cannot at all fit into. You can't smoke weed and make all A's, now can you? So, as annoying as they may be, give them some appreciation. I'm somewhat of a Goody-Goody myself.
Geeks: I almost forgot these guys for some reason, especially since I myself am quite largely a Geek. Geeks play a lot of videogames and spend a hell of a lot of time on their computers, lack much of a social life like Goody-Goodys and Outsiders, aside from maybe LAN parties and Conventions, and probably watch a lot of anime and such. I was a huge Geek, then I took up the bass guitar and my mind was forever altered by Heavy Metal music and such. Now I barely play videogames at all and have little interest in them, or anything else that's Geek related for that matter, but I still brag about the 50+ action figures in my room, and FLCL kicks much ass. They can also be huge pop culture junkies, which is always cool, and out of any of these categories, I think they are the most mimicked, and the funniest stereotype as well. I salute you guys, you people rock.
Individuals: I'll bet you want me dead now. "What? Individuals can't be categorized, they're...individual!" There's still a lot more of them than you think. I myself think that I am an Individual, though my roots will always be firmly planted in the Geek area. Individuals are personalities all on their own. They can find common bonds with others quite easily and quickly, and like the Punks, love to stand out, and they will emulate other stereotypes, but never overdoing it and they never lose touch with themselves. Their music tastes are somewhat similar, but each of them has a specific band or artist or something that seperates them from the rest. They have various talents and philosophies and can sometimes blend in with multiple other stereotypes. Despite how different they all are, they somehow fit in together and associate and congregate in groups together. Most all of my friends are Individuals, but with roots in other stereotypes. I don't think it's possible to be born an Individual, you have to start somewhere before you see the light. Like I said, I think of myself as an Individual.
Well, there's my list. More could be added, who knows? I would've done Sluts/Pimps, but that's too small for a true category...for now at least. Feel free to attack me in any way you want, I don't really care. Here's a challenge while you're at it if you want to attack me or something: Try to categorize me! C'mon, I dare ya! But first, try to categorize yourself and see what happens, hehehe. I'm out.