Rating: 2 out of 5
Rating: 5 out of 5, w00t!
Rating: 4 out of 5...would've gotten a 3 or lower but that decapitation was funny and surprising.
Rating: 2 out of 5
Rating: 4 out of 5
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| YOU GOT ROM!! CONTINUED... | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| TIGER HELICOPTER: Bland name, bland game. A slower overhead shooter where you're a helicopter. It's so slow that I got annoyed and quit. There were no powerups, the graphics were very dull for the NES, and the only enemies were tanks, though it was neat that I could blow up houses.
Err, those squares that are either two shades of red or blue. Those are the houses...Like I said, pitiful graphics. Rating: 2 out of 5 |
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| LITTLE SAMSON: Now this is a cool game! Great graphics, great control, what's not to like? There are 4 playable characters: Little Samson himself, who throughs little bombs and can climb, the Golem, who is big and strong and punches stuff, the Dragon, who can fly and spit fireballs and do a charge attack, and the Mouse, who can climb better than Samson and drops bombs and is really small. This side-croller is pretty fast-paced, with some amusing and original enemy designs, and a nice challenge. Once you round up the 4 heroes, you can pause the game and switch between the 4 mid-level to suit the situation. Got a tight space to go through? Use the Mouse! Got a large pit to cross, pick the Dragon! Nothing generic here. It's too bad this game wasn't too popular, I love it.
Rating: 5 out of 5, w00t! |
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| See the mouse? He's upside-down! OMG LOL!! | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| THE INCREDIBLE CRASH DUMMIES: Seanbaby (www.seanbaby.com) from EGM said that this game was really lame, but I think it's kind of fun. Remember The Incredible Crash Dummies? I had one of their action figures, and I think they had their own cartoon too. Recently, Hot Wheels (I could be wrong) released some new figures and stuff, I should check them out. Back to the game. I don't remember a Dummy who's legs were a unicycle, but that's who you play as. And wait a second, something awkward happened! Yes, I'm playing these games as I write them. I went at a high speed, hit a wall, and have been decapitated! Look! Now the controls are reversed, WTF? That was weird. But I died and got my head back, so all is well. And I just did it again after picking up a powerup that wouldn't let me stop. WTF? Ah well, how many other games let you play as a decapitated character? Seriously, if you know of one, tell me!
Rating: 4 out of 5...would've gotten a 3 or lower but that decapitation was funny and surprising. |
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| AMAGON: I really wanted to figure out this game, but I just couldn't. I think you're playing as a pink guy who's plane crashed on the island, and you shoot stuff. It says "Get ready for your mission!" But what's the mission? I have no friggin' clue. You just run and shoot stuff, that's all there is to it. I guess it's like Contra, only not nearly as fast, no new guns, and the dominant colors are green, pink, and blue. How lame.
Rating: 2 out of 5 |
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| GODZILLA 2: WAR OF THE MONSTERS: I must admit, I'm a Godzilla fan. I love kaiju. This game isn't so bad. It's a turn-based strategy game. I don't quite get everything about it, or the slot machine type thing that it does before attacks, but oh well. This game is also hard. I can't beat the first mission, but I still like it. Don't ask me why, I just do. So this review will tell you nothing, though I doubt any of these reviews do.
Actually, after I wrote this, I did beat the first level. I somehow killed Baragon with a single attack. Go me! This game still rules! Rating: 4 out of 5 |
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| Well, that's it. You probably hate me now for doing half-assed reviews of half-assed games, but oh well. It's better than nothing, isn't it? | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Back to the Haven! Get me out of here! | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| (This Review written by Brett) | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||