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It all starts the night before my "graduaton day", June 2004. This event was a picnic at the local park for all the graduates during school (cool). The tradition is, that during the wee hours of that morning, all the graduates drive around in a caravan honking their horns. So the night before, I call my friend to find out the meeting place for all participants, he said "oh in the park at 4:30am". At 4 thirty, I am in the park, its dark and there is nobody else there. I knew this had to be wrong place, but I wait and listen. Suddenly, here comes a white car, "park police, uh oh" I thought but it was just regular car and it pulled up next to me. I get out and so does he, and he says as we shake hands, "Hey, so uh what are we doing here?". As this was occuring, a dash of light reveals his true identity. A man, much older, maybe mid thirties, average but smaller than my gangly teen frame so I could take him with sheer size if I had to. Thinking he is trying to get info on the horn brigade/caravan, I played it cool and said, "I dunno". We both snickered. I then sauntered to my car and got in, shaking. I didn't know if he was crazy or what. You've got to understand that this park was completely isolated by at least three miles distance and perfect for late night drug pick ups away from the city, which has been known to occur there. He then began to talk about the most incredible stuff I ever heard. He did a half hour rant on how we were brought together by god because he was guided there by him (all to funny because I'm an atheist and I told him so). This guy was talking like he got molested way to many times by the local preist. All the while i had the knife I always carry in my pocket ready to stab him in his righteous throat if he approached the car. And I couldn't drive away either, what happens if he chases me? He kept noting my evident fear, I was scared, but man I felt so ready to kill the guy. It was the closest I ever came to killing somebody and man is it a scary situation. I was more afraid of killing than the man himself. After a half hour of sermon, he thought it best to get back to his family. He wanted to follow me out becaus he claimed he was guided there by god and needed for me to guide him back (I guess that makes me jesus). I pointed out the window to his exit when I drove past and made a beeline to the school. "Man", I thought, "Maybe the meeting is at the school", but a half hour late? Upon arriving to the school a little before 5 am the brigade was about to get under way. "Oh my pee wee hermon", I thought, "I have made it!". I really wanted to be a part of this thing because its like a right of passage and it wasn't like everybody did it, just the ones who wanted to have some excitment (like I needed). Driven by adrenalin from the last incident I cautiously got near the front of the line admist the other less cautious (understatement) drivers. I mean, my car is my baby, its a nice ride and I didn't want it fucked up. The brigade is notoriuous for accidents and we didn't get out of the damn driveway of the school until I watched the back end of the car in front of me jerk up and then to the side. I quickly slammed on the breaks, knowing he had hit someone. Me, a good driver, stopped just short of hitting him, I then was bumped abruptly from behind. The impact wasn't hard but I thought it cracked my bumper. I felt ensuing bumps as the cars behind piled up. I looked behind to see the people behind me, (blonds with long hair) swaying and jerking to the impacts (kinda funny to see their long blond hair flying all around). I was standing on the break now. Afterwards there is always the afer-accident ritual of checking for damage and waiting for police. Most of the cars were really fucked up. Me, being in the middle of all of it, suvived with just a scuff on my back bumper. So I, as did the blonds who made that scuff took off to meet the brigade which doubled back. After all that happened, nothing was going to stop me now. All in all everything was going along swimmingly until the two cars leading (right in front of me) decided to take up both lanes of a road right in front of a sheriff's car. Everybody saw the sheriff's car and the lights go on. We were screwed, we kept going until we turned down a narrow street and the sheriff blocked us off. Half of the brigade was trapped on the road and half kept going straight past the intersection. As always, the sheriff was HUGE and screamed for us to get out of our cars and walk back to the end of the line. After several moments of more ranting and sermonizing of a different kind, we were let free. Of course we coordinated and met with the other part of the chain and it all was ended uneventfully awhile after. After that rough early morning I enjoyed a nice day at the park's beach where I learned the girl I wanted to take to the prom in fact was available as I mistook her backup date for her real date (like if I should have known), who she really wanted to go with was me. I am a dumbass, I will never understand women. |
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