*Beatle Humor*

Funny quotes I've compiled from many sources. Thanks to Fil for reminding me I had them

Question: Why don't you smile, George?
George: I'll hurt me lips.

Q: How do you feel about the nightclub, Arthur, named after your hairstyle?
George: I was proud, until I saw the night club...

Q: Girls rushed around my car because it had press identification and they thought I met you. How do you explain this phenomenon?
John: You're lovely to look at.

Q: Where you worried about the oversized roughnecks who tired to infiltrate the airport crowd on your arrival?
Ringo: That was us!

Q: Who would The Beatles like to meet more than anyone else?
Ringo: Santa Claus.

Q: Paul, you look like my son.
Paul: You don't look a bit like my mother.

Q: How about you other guys, how do you feel about Ringo being nominated for president?
John: We think he should win. Definately in favor.
George: Yeah
Q: Would you make them part of your cabinet?
Ringo: I'd have to, wouldn't I?
George: I could be the door.
John: I could be the cupboard.

Ringo: John is married. We'll all get married in the end.
Paul: We will, in the end?
John: You mean you're not funny like the rumor says?

Q: Are you married?
George: No, I'm George.

Q:
Are you wearing wigs or real hair?
Paul: Hey, where's the police?
Ringo: Take her out!
George: Our hair is real. What about yours, lady?

Q: Do you resent fans ripping up your sheets for souvenirs?
Ringo: I don't mind. As long as I'm not in them while the ripping is going on.
Q: What would you do if fans got past the police lines?
George: We'd die laughing.

Q: What excuse do you have for your collar length hair?
John: Well, it gorws out of yer head.

Q: Which one of you is really bald?
Paul: I'm bald!
Ringo: I'm bald!
John: We're all bald.
George: I'm deaf and dumb too.

"(Paul) was always about 9 months older than me. Even now, he's still 9 months older than me!" ~ George

Q: One of your hits is "Roll Over Beethoven". What do you think of Beethoven as a composer?
Ringo: He's great, especially his poems.

Q: What about your hairdos, where did they...
Paul: You mean the hairdon'ts?

Q: Is it true that none of you can read or write music?
Paul: None of us can read or write music. The way we work is like, we just whistle. John will whistle at me and I'll whistle back at him.

Q: With all the girls chasing you all over the world, who's the most exciting woman you've ever met?
John: Ringo's mother was pretty hot. I'm only joking.

Q: How did you find America?
John: Turned left at Greenland.

 

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