Dear University of Calgary,
I am interested in attending your school of higher learning. With
regards to my previous failure to achieve adequate grades in the past at
your institution, it was not actually me, but rather 3 leprechauns posing as
me. You must understand that I took their gold and then to get back at me
they kept me locked up in a tiny leprechaun sized prison where I was
constantly beaten, so that they could in my absence ruin not only my
academic rating but my credit rating as well. I will do better this time
around because I bought a magic gorilla hand and wished to know everything.
I hope to see you in the fall and thank you for your consideration.
Sincerely
Craig Elder
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