Last week, Shane decided to imitate his childhood, and current, hero, a Mr. Nicholas Reyes. Mr. Reyes is a Spanish and Health teacher at a school called Orion Junior High. Mr. Reyes was also a boxer in his spare time, or so he claimed. Shane decided to imitate him by taking boxing lessons. He went down to the nearest gym that had lessons. Unfortunatly, it was in the slums in downtown Ogden. Shane figured that although normaly he would likely be mugged, seeing as how he was taking boxing lessons, he could fight off the mugger. How wrong he was. You see, he never made it to the gym. As he got out of his mom's car, he was hit over the head with a frozen salmon. All his money was taken. His mom sped off, using the mugging as a convient distraction. Shane's body, although still living, was drug off. He woke up when some local cannibals were just about to feast. He let out a scream the likes of which the world has never seen, and hopefully will never be heard again. The cannibal's eardrums burst at once under the shrill power of the scream. The moral of this story is that Shane screams like a girl, and if you think he is going to scream, plug your ears if you ever want to use them again in this life, or the next.
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