| 9 From 6(Bears) |
| Too much idle time can be dangerous. For me, it's an opportunity to ponder the great mysteries of life, it's meaning, or meaninglessness, and reflect on the way I've lived and the way I wish to live.. While this can be a productive and healthy use of one's time, it can get out of hand as one may dwell far too long on poor decisions, past mistakes, and personal insecurities. Negative feelings about one's self can snowball, if unchecked, and can lead to unwarranted neurosis. Then, hopefully, something comes along that puts things in perspective. Over the last year, and in no small way due to the abundance of "down time" while temping and working, I've been thinking about life and what I want from it. I've inspected past decisions and accomplishments and studied cause and effect pertaining to my life. How have I acheived what I have acheived? Why did I fail when I have failed? I've put great thought into my own psychological shortcomings and how to overcome them. Mostly, I've wondered what the best way to live is. To paraphrase the "Hero from Vero," life is short and has no profound meaning. As useless as my meditations may have been, I've accumulated a set of rules from my own experiences and a little help from history's great thinkers, that I think are useful for making the most of the brief time we are allotted. 1. Never Take the Easy Way Out Of course, this doesn't apply to ALL situations. What I've learned is that when there is something to be gained by simply expending effort and trying, then one should try. It is easy to be comfortable and lazy, but is unsatisfying. A person who takes the easy way out is of little worth. People often exercise the mentality of thinking that they will take action "someday." This makes for wonderful dreams, but a dreary life. These people never grow. It has long been said that anything worth having comes with risk. Risk is not easy, and those who take the easy road in life gain nothing. Taking the easy path can lead to regret, the "what might have been" scenario, which should be minimized in life. 2. Don't Worry I have been a worrier all my life and to this day cannot see a bit of good it does. Things are seldom as bad as we worry they will be and, even if things do turn out bad, worry can do nothing to change the future except worsen health. Worry is no more than a negative reaction and should be minimized. 3. Face Your Fears Fear is a straightjacket. If it deters one from doing what one desires, then it should be faced and overcome. To face your fears is to grow. When I was 15 I was, believe it or not, afraid to drive a car. I learned and shall most likely never fear it again. If I get in a major auto accident, I may fear getting in a car again, but I should hope that I would. Fear is natural and surely will never be totally eliminated. Irrational fears should be faced, however, or life is yours to miss. 4. Be Confident Confidence is invaluable. The potential of human beings is remarkable, and confidence facilitates this potential. Confidence is positivity and should be maximized just as fear and worry should be minimized. Most of us function within a society and, while it shouldn't matter what people think of you, it is usefull for the quality of your life to have a good standing with others. Confidence attracts women, and earns respect. It extends limits. The more confindence you have the more you can do in all areas of life. 5. Act with Dignity and Grace It is not overly important what others think of you. I do feel, however, that other people are the most precious resource that we have in life. Win the effection of these people by behaving in a manner worthy of it. Without people to care about and whom care about you, life is lessened to be sure. Behaving with grace and dignity will elevate the social opinion of you and will increase your self worth. 6. Don't be a Flake(follow through) There are few ways to more quickly lose someone's respect than to let them down. Follow through with committments. A flake will soon gain a reputation as someone who is "all talk," essentially a liar, and will not be taken seriously or trusted. Flakes won't create worthwhile social ties or grow as individuals. People are valuable. If trust is to be broken, let the other party be guilty of it. 7. Pro-Activity is Your Best Bet If you want to accomplish something you can imagine it happening with all the fibers of your brain, you can ask a god to make it so, or you can talk about it until the buffalo come home. The best way to get something done, however, is to be pro-active. Procrastination is unsatisfying and leads nowhere. Set your goal, be it lofty or small, and acheive it by doing. Action is always respected more than talk. Action means something, where talk, usually, says nothing. While I admitt that I haven't taken action as much as I should have(who truly has?), I look at those who have taken much less than I and am thankful I am not in their place. Take action. 8. The Past is the Past It is useless to dwell on past mistakes. If you were too frightened to cross a bridge, open a door, or approach someone yesterday, there is no reason why you can't do that very thing today.. Leave the nonsense of the past behind. What was not possible yesterday is possible today. 9. Enjoy Life The most important rule by far. A life not enjoyed is one wasted. No one knows why we're here or for how long. No one ever will. Life is short and there is certainly a diverse world full of many things to take pleasure in. While I don't have the faintest idea as to the meaning of life, I truly doubt that we're here to suffer. Even if we are, I'm sure as hell not going to. When you are on your deathbed and look back on your life, what will you see? I hope to see a life which includes many different experiences in many different places. I hope to remember many wonderful people and the taste of delicious food. I suspect I won't wish I had worked more hours or made more money. I hope I won't have many regrets to dwell upon and will have much happiness and enjoyment to reflect on. I plan to live this life. To quote Thoreau-"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined." |
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