I love cats they taste just like chicken
Out of my mind... back in 5 minutes
Cover me! I'm changing lanes..
As long as there are test, there will be prayer in public school
Happiness is a belt-fed weapon
Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot
Sometimes I wake up Grumpy, other times I let her sleep
I want to die in my sleep like my Grandfather...not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car...
Montana- At least our cows are sane
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian
Your kid might be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT!
It is as bad as you think and they ARE after you!
I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
When there's a will, I want to be in it!
"Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?!"
If we weren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?
Time is the best teacher, unfortunately it kills all its students
It's lonely at the top but you eat better
Forget about world peace...visualize using your turn signal!
Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear!
Give me ambiguity or give me something else...
We were born naked, wet & hungry, then things got worse...
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot
He who laughs last thinks slowest!
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else
Lottery: a tax on people bad at math
Very funny Scotty. Now beam down my clothes!
Consciousness: that annoying time between naps
i souport publik edekasion
We are microsoft. Resistance is futile. You will be Assimilated.
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
3 kinds of people: those who can count & those you can't
Why is "abbrveiation" such a long word?
Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggie"...util you find a rock.
I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with subatmoic particles.
It's the friends you call up at 4am that matter.
Heaven doesn't want me & Hell's afraid I'll take over.
I believe in dragons good men and other fantasy creatures!
The Goddess is alive and Magic is afoot
Witches are crafty people
I can't sleep the clowns will eat me I can't sleep the clowns will eat me...
Friends help friends move. Real friends help friends move bodies.
Stop! I am a Goddess
Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies!
Bad Cop No Doughnut
Deny Everything
Our Governor can kick your Governor's ass
I'm not a slut; I'm just popular!
Goddess inside
We can kick your ass without smearing our eyeliner
Anti-social
Does not play well with others
life's a bitch and then you die
Just one more and that's it...well maybe another
Your god Your Rules You burn in Hell!
Oh, go bugger off!
Have a day.
You don't see "I" in "team" but you can find "me" & "am"
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila floor
Ahhh I'm gonna die and I'm gonna take someone else down with me!
Note: when you see me change lanes watch for other cars braking suddenly
You are invading my personal space
Lions, tigers & bears...okay what else is on the menu?
How am I driving? honk once of good, repeatedly for bad.
My child beat up the honor studentat his school
Mean people Suck!
All people Suck!
Have a nice day!
It's not how you pick your nose but where you stick the booger
Not all who wander are lost
I like fire!
Darwin }}}>Kiss ass
Sorry! Blonde moment
Guns don't kill people; people kill people
Participating member of the NRA, back off
Remember I have a gun when you try to cut infront of me
You shouldn't run over animals it's much more fun to run over pedestrians
What's your poison?
Use the Force Luke....
I don't care what the test say; I'm not your Father
Save the planet kill yourself
I stop for black cats
My body's not a temple it's an amusement park
If you are irritable annoying or just plain rude there will be a $10 fine
Magic Happens
Of all the things I Lost I Miss My Mind The Most
Reality is for people who lack Imagination
Having Abandoned my search for the Truth I'm now looking for a good Fantasy
Where's Messiah when I need Her?
BEWITCHED
Please feel free to stare, point, whisper and ask questions
All I ever needed to know I learned from a Porno
The Whole world is going to Hell, and I'm Driving the bus
I Hate you :)
I chose not to live in Reality
When i grow up i want to be like me
Ready to Snap
Thank You For Not Being Perky
I'm thinking the Same thing About You
LEGALLY INSANE
Quietly plotting MY REVENGE
Runs With Scissors
You're just Jealous because the voices talk to me...
Bitch Magnet
I Hate this Town
Foxy Lady
GO AWAY
Fallen Angel
This Is what a Goddess looks like
Good Girls drive Bitchin' Toys
Do the voices talk to you too?
Jesus saves! Passes to Gretzky...he shoot...HE SCORES!!!
Learn From your Parents mistakes-Use Birth Control
Forget the Chakram Beware of owner
You're only this close because I let you
Amazons Rule!
Support Disney's Family values "When you wish upon a star..Makes NO Difference Who YOU ARE"
Celebrate Diversity
I'm straight Not Narrow
If you're not outraged, You're not paying attention
Doing my Part to PISS OFF the RADICAL RIGHT
DO ask DO tell
IMRU?
It's only Kinky the first time
Sorry I Missed Church, I was Busy Practicing Witchcraft And Becoming A Lesbian
Bert And Ernie were too