I would tell you of my birth, of my time as a baby, but I want this to be a first hand account, so I shall skip all that and go straight to my early childhood. My first memories were of sunny, grass fields, and an apartment building and being shy. I was, and I suppose I still am, a shy person. I have never dealt well with crowds. I don't remember much from my childhood...the younger years. But I do remember school...
School...I was the kid that was picked on. I have never fit in, and as a natural outsider I was the one the bullies liked to pick on. Thats how I got the chip in my front tooth, a bully. I was allways too imaginative and too much of a daydreamer for school to ever hold much interest for me. Now, don't get me wrong, I wasn't a stupid kid, I just coasted along, more intent on my fantasies then on any lessons that were being tought to me. However, I did discover something that would keep me out of trouble later in life: A love of literature, of books and words.
Math...Math I suck at. I can't do math worth a dang. I find it odd that I would have such a bad head for numbers, yet a passion for words. Just one of the odd things about me I guess.
Ok, back to the story of my life. My father was millitary, and as such worked alot, and we also moved around alot. I spent most of my formative years overseas, in places like Germany and England. So, being seperated from my friends every few years I learned not to make alot of close, lasting friendships. Which suited me just fine, as I found that there weren't many people I could trust anyway. But, until I reached High School, I was still the guy that was picked on by people. My shyness and niavety made me an easy mark for both the bullies, and the girls who liked to tease the school "nerd." That combined with an emotionally abusive mother...well, I was hurting inside, but I refused to let it show. After all, I had no one to talk to.
Eventually I managed to get home to my beloved Florida. The scents of home flooded my nostrills and I knew happiness. I met some of my best friends at home, and I finally broke out of my shell in the 10th grade. Discovering that I had a knack for oddball humor, and I began to polish my poetic skills. I also had some of the first serious, mature relationships of my life there...none to last. Eventually I grew depressed. After all, all my life I had been the outsider, and never had friendships that would last. I began to feel the things I had never let myself feel....lonelyness. It was also back home that I would start working at McDonalds.
McDonalds...What can I say, it was a job. But it was also fun! I had friends there, and we were all united in one thing: Hatred of the idiot customers! I mean we saw some of the DUMBEST people come into our store! But anyway, it was while I was working there that I met Christina, who woudl become my fiance, through a friend of a friend from highschool
My fiance...I will say nothing bad about her. Neither one of us were ready for the relationship we were in, and we both let each other down. However, 2 things I will say about that time. First is that during our time together I discovered my faith. And second is that my love for her is what led me to making one of the biggest decisions of my life: in order to support her, and our future family, I would join the United States Air Force. And things havn't been the same since.
On January 5th, 1999, I would go to Basic Training. I would stumble through that until March, when I was to graduate. And it was after my flights Graduation Ceremony that I would be pulled aside by my parents, taken to sit with the First Shirt and Chaplain, and be told that my brother, Cordell, was missing. And had been since February. I was shocked...and then, the next day, I would find out that his body had been found. I think it was my faith, and my stubborness, that kept me alive. But I was an emotional wreck. Then I went to Tech School..
Keesler AFB, in the great state of Mississippi, only 3 hours away from where I came from. I was still emotionally unstable from the loss of my brother, and it was only the company of the my fellow Wiccans that kept me from going completely insane. It was also during this time that I would break up with Christina, and find some of my best friends...my new "family". And I would also find Silver.
Silver, Heart of my Heart, and the Sister of my Soul. I fell in love with her, and she was to be my first lover. I gave her my virginity, and I still remember the feel of her against me. And I still remember how she hurt me more then any female has ever hurt me before, or since. But...I understood her, and we remain best of friends. We were TOO similar to work out as serious lovers, but as friends...Well, we are very close. We hold no secrets from each other.
After Silver came another female, whom abandoned me after I left Tech School. Surprise surprise...And then I arrived in the lovely state of Oklahoma. Where I currently remain.
The story of my life has many more twists and turns then I have presented here, but I feel it is time to draw this tale to a close. I have learned a few things in my life. To qoute Practicle Magic "Fall in love whenever you can", and that friends may come and go, but Friends are there for you, whenever you need them, no matter what. Cherish your friends, and keep them close to you.
Goodbye, friend.
