Wednesday Update for November 7, 2001.
Today marks the 10th anniversary of Magic Johnson’s announcement that he was retiring from the NBA due to the HIV virus, when asked what he would do if he could do it over again, Johnson allegedly replied: “I’d probably have a better assortment of women.”
The World Champion Arizona Diamondbacks held their victory parade yesterday, Yankee Fans held an egging of Yankee Stadium.
In a related story, after their Game 7 loss to Arizona Yankee Owner George Steinbrenner apparently blurted out “You just can’t trust Afghans with sporting events.”
The US admitted Sunday that the color of the food packages the US has been dropping in Afghanistan are the same color as the cluster bombs their dropping, when asked for a comment, Attorney General John Ashcroft reportedly said, “I told them not to put the color blind guy in charge of that.” The military has since changed the food package color to orange.
Today, President Bush announced that the IRS had cut ties between Osama Bin Laden and organizations in four states, good job, only about 1000 more organizations left.
Finally, tonight, the Afghan Northern Alliance has started taking my advice and firing massive loads of rubber chickens at the Taliban.
That is the news. Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.