The End is Harder Than the Beginning

Log: Samra Chance and Garage Wells

When: Backdated a bit, sometime in February

Where: The house they shared

What: Garage and Sam talk about the end of their marriage. It's not fun.

 

 

His body was warm next to hers and so very comforting. After all that had happened, the half-truths and lying by omission, it was something of a surprise that they were both still here. His arm tightened around her mid-section and she felt the kind of security she had always longed for.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into her neck. He'd read this in the cards days ago. He wasn't sure who would make the first betrayal; quite frankly he was surprised when it turned out to be his actions that dissolved their marriage thread.

"I'm not angry," she whispered back. "Just… Sad. This is my fault too."

"I didn't want it to end like this," he offered weakly.

She sighed. "It was going to be one of us Garage. Would it have hurt you more if I had done it?"

He knew what she meant and he wasn't entirely certain. Maybe fate had been kind to them both. "Will you be happy?" he asked softly.

"Someday. Maybe," she said, the words such a strange echo back to where this had all begun.

He sighed. "I think I should move out," he whispered.

"I don't think we should do that to Enki," Sam admonished. "I know he'll understand; he's a very smart boy. But we shouldn't disrupt the security and comfort we've built for him."

"What do you propose Sam?" I can't stay here and watch you break your own heart every day because you don't think you're ready to be with him. I really can't watch you finally get over it and actually be his.

She sighed, settling into his embrace even more. This was comfortable, safe territory. Everything after this was strange and new, maybe everything she had ever wanted. "Maybe we can expand," she said lightly. "Another bedroom."

It was as if he were holding his breath for a better response. He let it go in a sound of disappoint. Clearly, he wasn't interested in this idea. "I can't do that," he said, pulling away lightly. "I… That's asking too much Sam. I'll just move onto campus for now. I'll see Enki there. You're much better with him than I am anyway and I'll still be like a dad if he needs me to be. Just… Not here." He didn't want her to know that he was already spending most of his nights at Ganymede's quiet little house in Homestead.

She didn't know this yet, didn't want to. So she opted to believe that he was right and making a noble gesture. She wasn't going to belabor the point. It would be terribly awkward sharing room and board when they were sharing their beds with someone else. She swallowed hard, surprised that there was still this much emotion choked up inside of her. "When will you leave?"

"Tomorrow," he said quietly. He'd been planning on the move, slowly packing his things when Sam wasn't around. She'd been giving him a wide berth, spending a lot of her time at Graves Hall, or with Enki playing outside. She knew, just as well as he that this was coming. She was happy to deny it and pretend it wasn't happening, but the truth was slithering among them, dark and serious.

She didn't reply to that. She wasn't sure she could. She lay still next to him, biting her lip and regretting every stupid thing that had happened to lead them to this point. He rose from the bed, quiet and slow. He wanted to savor one last night in her arms but now it felt wrong, almost dirty. It felt worse than the morning after he'd broken the marriage thread. He took his pillows and slept on the couch while Sam wept for what she hoped would be the last time.