chou aniki: great brother
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Chou Aniki (aka Choaniki, usually translated as "Great Brother," but also roughly translated as "Super Older Brother", "Hyper Big Brother" or "Ultra Power Brother") is a homoerotic videogame shooter series to the umpteenth power, with a small hint of incest to keep things interesting. Oftentimes advertised in publications as a "humorous shooter" with "buff guys", the videogame series basically involves you having to frenetically blast away at a grotesque assortment of near-indescribable biomechanical hybrid monstrosities and pixelated beefcake who have an unnatural tendency to bend, stretch, strike, and flex out into every faggoty pose imaginable, which I am told is supposed to be some strange cultural joke in Japan (it's country of origin). Presented here is an overview of the series as it progressed over time.

The early 1992 PC-Engine Super CD-ROM2 (TurboGrafx-16 CD) game, simply titled Chou Aniki (Great Brother), the first in the series, gave you the option of controlling either one of two characters, the male character "Ideran" and the female character "Benran", both of which have the ability to fire energy beams and various other projectile weapons from the palms of their hands. During gameplay, your main character is accompanied by an upgradeable assistant "satellite" character, either one of the two well-oiled flying musclemen "brothers" Adon and Samson, both alternately represented by a crudely drawn color palette-swiped sprite in a G-string. Your satellite character had the ability to blast intense beams of energy at your many foes via a fairly nondescript hole through the top of his bald, shiny head, and you basically controlled your main character like you would normally control a flying gunship in any other average 2-D side scrolling shooter (a flying gunship armed with penis missiles, mind you).

Front; nothing unusual here. Back; a mere hint of the gayness contained within.

The above box art (featuring Ideran and Benran) for the first installment in the series, Chou Aniki (Great Brother) for the NEC PC-Engine Super CD-ROM2, certainly looks innocent enough.

The one that started it all.

Even this tame looking screenshot from the above PC-Engine game doesn't really look all that bad. Aside from the really piss-poor sprite of a naked man in a G-string as your "satellite" (and the enemy ship possibly being a ridiculously huge biomechanical testicle with guns), this basically looks like any other side scrolling shooter.

The series went on hiatus for a couple of years, and probably would have been considered a fluke of sorts had the homoerotica series just stopped there before ultimately deciding to come back with a rectum-violating vengeance. For the 1995 PC-Engine Super CD-ROM2 sequel, Ai • Chou Aniki (Love • Great Brother), the developers decided to change direction slightly and dumped Ideran and Benran, instead bringing the brothers Adon and Samson front and center, and layered the game in a thick, sticky, undeniably phallic-heavy protein rich syrup from which it would never escape.

Front; remember that small hint of incest I was telling you about earlier? Back; "Do the muscle"? HA! Oh, those witty Japanese!

These front and back box art shots (featuring the brothers Adon and Samson) for Ai • Chou Aniki (Love • Great Brother), the PC-Engine CD-ROM2 sequel of the game, DEFINITELY shows signs of the returning videogame series' new penis-charged direction.

Somebody created this on purpose?

Screenshot from the sequel. The graphics have certainly improved, but are now also suffering from an extremely bad case of TEH GHEY.

When the series made a comeback in 1995, the aging PC-Engine Super CD-ROM2 system could only provide the game programmers so much in the way of pixelated cock-in-face goodness before the hardware was graphically spent, so the developers lubed up again and decided to bring the series on over to the Sony PlayStation (in 1995) and Sega Saturn (1996) as well. Returning to it's roots with this pseudo-remake of the first game in the series, you were again given a choice between Ideran and Benran, this time both represented by digitized sprites of real live actors who were actually PAID to be in this game (unsurprisingly, they supposedly worked under pseudonyms). Also, new satellite characters in the form of angelic children were added to aid Benran in her quest, while Adon and Samson were made exclusive to Ideran instead.

Front; they actually found people to pose for this cover? Back; again, more unnecessary posing.

Front and back box art shots from the Sony PlayStation edition, Chou Aniki: Kyuukyoku Muteki Ginga Saikyou Otoko (Great Brother: Ultimate Invincible Milky Way's Strongest Man).

Front; I almost feel sorry for the two live actors in the middle. This was probably the high point of their careers. Back; later in the game, I wouldn't be surprised if that viking helmet somehow ends up in your ass.

Box art shot from the Sega Saturn edition of the game, Chou Aniki: Kyuukyoku ... Otoko no Gyakushu (Great Brother: Ultimate ... Man's Counterattack). Despite the oddly abbreviated subtitle (with "..." apparently representing "Invincible Milky Way's Strongest"), the slightly updated Saturn edition is virtually identical to its PlayStation counterpart, with the main difference (to my knowledge) being tweaked video graphics.

Oh yeah, this looks fun...

Title screen from the Sega Saturn edition. I'm turned on scared already.

Perhaps he is a partner in butt sex? (har har...)

Player select screen. Don't ask me who that grinning idiot in the middle is. As far as I know, he's not selectable.

The viking helmet is the most normal thing here.

You. Training Stage. Decked out in spandex briefs and a viking helmet. While flying over a major metropolitan city. And shooting at floating orbs of mucus. Boogers. I think.

Doublemint.

In-between levels, you are treated to special bits of digitized video animation featuring delightful imagery such as this.

Those angelic children swarming around your character actually help you along your quest.

First level screenshot. You figure out what's going on here.

Oh lord...

First level boss. I really wish I was making this shit up.

Dear God, WHY?!?

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?

Oh yeah, he certainly looks intimidating...

Second level screenshot. Appears to take place in a sports stadium. Also, take note of the jiggly ducky head which has sprouted from out of that enemy's crotch.

Just be glad that you can't hear the barking sounds they are making.

Second level boss. The guy in the middle (a sports instructor) calls upon men off screen to come forth and form a human pyramid.

The hell?

Err...

THE HELL!?

Don't ask. Even I don't want to know.

Oh yeah, this scene obviously makes completely perfect sense. Just like everything else in this game.

Level three boss. A cross between a frog and a snail. What this has to do with a game full of beefy men who joyfully ram their groins into one another, I have no idea...

Congratulations, the pain has ended.

Game Over. The best part of the game.

Cover art for the Super Famicom edition.
The Chou Aniki videogame shooter series is currently available for the NEC PC-Engine Super CD-ROM2, the Sega Saturn, and the Sony PlayStation. Of special note is that there is also a non-shooter "grapple game" in the series available for the Super Famicom (Super Nintendo) as well, titled Chou Aniki: Bakuretsu Rantouden (Great Brother: Exploding Battle) and released in 1995. Apparently, it is a wrestling/fighting game, which seems much more appropriate for this type of material. Check out this rompit review over at Something Awful for a humorous look at the game and a chance to try it out yourself in fully playable ROM form.

Published by Masaya, Copyright NCS (Nippon Computer System), and, unsurprisingly, legally available only in Japan (sorry, Alex).

To experience a taste of TEH GHEY firsthand (and at your own risk), feel free to visit the official Chou Aniki website.

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