From Argus 1987: 
 
Beta Omicron Omicron Mu: Or, BOOM!!!! by David Wilkinson

     My story is very unusual. I started out a normal, (if slightly perverse)
college student. Now, I'm not quite so sure what I am. It all started at a wild
frat party. I finally laid my new girlfriend. It was about time. I'd been
going with her for two weeks. After a night of booze, drugs and wild sex--
which included an orgy with 3 other couples--- We all decided to go for 
a pizza. It was after we left the pizzaria that we heard the news.
     The summit talks broke down. The newscaster sounded scared. His 
voice cracked and trembled through my Fiero's powerful sound system.
I got on my c.b. to my 3 friends in their cars behind us. I told them to
follow me, I had a plan. At the time, I didn't know what it was. But, they 
followed me. I guess it was because of the fact that I knew where the 
best parties were. But then again, it could've been the fact that we
were all messed up on various illegal substances.
     Or first stop was the dining hall. My friends didn't think it was 
a good idea to steal the food. But, I reminded them that within an hour,
all the Pigs were going to be burned to a crisp anyway. We loaded as much 
canned food into the four cars we had. Someone mentioned the fact that
the food sucked. I told them they had two choices: eating it or starving 
to death. 
     When we got to the Bomb Shelter on campus, the line we expected to
see wasn't there. As a matter of fact, the door to the Shelter was locked.
After getting the door open and moving all the supplies in, we heard it.
A low pitched whine. We decided then that we had no time to wait on other
people. We had to get in and bolt the door.
      The bomb was deafening. The heat in the Shelter rose to 122 degrees.
I started thinking I was dreaming. I hadn't thought it was really going 
to happen. I just wanted to party in the Bomb Shelter. Stealing the food
from the dining hall was just part of the game. And now the world was 
being burned to ashes.
     For three months, people kept banging on the door of the shelter, 
screaming for their lives. All of us inside agreed that if we opened the 
door, we'd flood the shelter with radiation. I felt bad, but hell we'd 
have died too. And, we were the only hope for mankinds survival.
     The six months we spent in the Shelter were living hell. We did 
have plenty to eat. We found out after the bombs went off that the Shelter
was filled with food and water. Enough for sixty people to survive on 
for months. What made it so bad was the boredom, there's only so much
eight people can do to keep their minds off the situation.
     All four of the girls wound up pregnant. I decided we should give 
them classy greek fraternity names. I also decided we should change our
own. "Shit, if were going to be the beginning of a new world, we should 
have classy names." I told everone.
     I opened the door and shouted into the sunlight. "Today is the 
beginning of a new order! Let us now go out into this raw world and 
conquer it!"
                           ***************
     "Well, that is the story my child." The old man said as he closed 
the tattered book. "That is why we celebrate the day when the Gods 
Zoos, Apallow, Hurkyewlies and Hermies left the Shelter and rebuilt the
world."
     "Wow! That's a neat story grandpa. Are they ever coming back?" The
child asked excitedly.
     "Yes my child, yes their coming again. In the future they will come.
With the Godesses Uhthina, Veenus, Aros, and Artima they will come back
to earth in Flaming Fiero's." He put the book back on the shelf.
     "Are they going to live with us?" The child asked.
     "No child, they will live in The Shelter they crawled from an aeon 
ago." The old man strained to his feet to leave. As he walked to the door,
a young woman walked up to him.
     "Daddy, you shouldn't be filling that boy's head up with such nonsense.
You know their not coming back." She said scornfully. "Its like burning those 
Pigs every year, a waste of time. They aren't coming back."
     "Yes they are!" He shouted angrily. "One day they will come, and so will 
the bombs. You'll see!" He pointed a finger at her. "And when your not invited 
to go to The Shelter with them, you'll be sorry you doubted the word of The Diary."
     She looked at him sadly. "Don't you know that book is full of fairy tales." 
She turned to the child. "Seezer, go get your bath and get ready for bed. Mommy's 
going to the orgy tonight." She kissed the child and then turned back to the old
man. "Oh, after the festivities, the new ruler is going to show us a new invention."
She smiled. "He said it would protect us from whatever may threaten us. It's called
explosives."
     The old man sighed and quietly left the room.