| A Few Steps More Elizabeth hovered outside the door to John�s quarters, not quite certain if she was trying to convince herself to knock or leave. She wasn�t sure what she thought he could do to help, but his parting words earlier in the day had been dead on: it was harder after dark. And if he�d been right about that� �Elizabeth?� Already on edge, she jerked and spun towards the voice to see John approaching from down the hall. �John. I was just�.� One hand gestured aimlessly. �Are you busy?� �Nope.� He stopped an arm�s length away. �What can I do for you?� She cleared her throat. �Earlier, you offered.�� She trailed off, uncomfortable explaining why she was more or less stalking his room. But John didn�t need any further explanation. �Of course.� He opened the door to his quarters and motioned that she should enter. �C�mon in.� Elizabeth hesitated again; despite how long a day it had been, she was still too jumpy to sit still and even the thought of being John�s quarters was making her feel claustrophobic. �Actually, I think I�m going to go take a walk. But thank you.� She turned to leave but was stopped by John�s voice. �Hey. Let me grab my jacket and I�ll join you.� And before Elizabeth could even decided if she wanted the company, John was coming back into the hall, pulling on his jacket and tossing another one in her direction. �Here. It�ll get cold soon.� She caught the jacket easily and stood motionless for a moment, watching as John moved away down the hall. �Come on,� he called over his shoulder. �I know just the place.� Pulling on his jacket, Elizabeth quickly caught up. ** She slowed as they walked down a hallway she had never seen before, taking in the unusual sight. John had brought her to the lowest level of an unused section of the city. This far down, the windows offered an underwater view which, this late at night, glowed a faint bluish-green colour thanks to Atlantis� lights shining from above. To their left, the wall was decorated with elaborate Ancient script from floor to ceiling and as far as she could see in either direction. The most fascinating thing about the writing, however, was how the words shimmered a soft green, illuminating the hallway and tingeing the area with a distinctly alien atmosphere. �When did you find this place?� Elizabeth asked as she ran the pads of her fingers over the Ancient writing, picking out familiar words from among those unknown to her. �Late yesterday,� John told her, craning his neck and looking out the window; from where she was standing, it seemed he was trying to see the rest of the city through the water. �McKay took a look at it, said it was decorative � poetry or something � and that he�d get to it when he had time.� He glanced at her over his shoulder, quirked a grin. �Actually, it was more along the lines of: he was a little busy trying to figure out how to protect the city, but if it was that important he could take a few days to read me poetry as long as I took responsibility when the Wraith destroyed Atlantis from orbit. But the end result�s the same.� Elizabeth smiled despite herself; that sounded just like Rodney. �And when was I going to be informed?� He shrugged one shoulder. �There�s a report around somewhere. Like I said, I didn�t find it until late last night and we were off-world for most of today.� She felt the smile fade from her lips. �Right,� she murmured. �I�m sure it�s on my desk.� She started down the hall again, suddenly unable to stand still. She knew John would follow, though part of her almost didn�t care. �I keep seeing his face,� Elizabeth said abruptly. �It doesn�t matter if my eyes are open or closed, all I can see is his face and the hole in his forehead�.� She hadn�t even been aware that she�d been twisting her fingers together, a habit she�d had since childhood, until John reached over and gently pried her hands apart, keeping her right hand clasped loosely in his left. Elizabeth didn�t pull away; his touch gave her something to focus on. The words kept coming. �He was smiling, and then he looked shocked. He was alive long enough to realize what had happened. He knew.� Her voice cracked slightly and she cleared her throat, embarrassed. They were both silent for several moments as they continued down the hall, side by side. John sighed. �I can�t tell you if he knew or not, but he didn�t feel anything, Elizabeth. It would have been painless.� She didn�t know if he was telling her the truth or was just trying to make her feel better, but she chose to believe him. She nodded. �As for seeing it over and over�.� He shook his head. �That�ll fade with time. For a few days it�s all you�ll be able to think about, then it�ll only be every few minutes, until eventually you only remember it as an occasional nightmare.� John�s fingers tightened over hers � not entirely voluntarily, she thought � and Elizabeth wondered what he saw in his nightmares. But the way his hand was still clenched around hers and the set of his jaw suggested that now was not a good time to ask. They continued walking in silence. It never even occurred to Elizabeth that she had no idea where she was until, a good two hours after she�d first arrived at John�s quarters, they passed McKay�s lab. After that, it was only another fifteen minutes until they were standing in front of her door. Elizabeth touched the sensor that would open her door and turned to look, really look, at John for the first time that night. �Thank you,� she said sincerely, if inadequately; for a woman who made her living using words she was having a difficult time finding the right ones to use. But he got it. �Any time,� he said lightly. His expression altered. �You okay?� He was utterly serious and it sat uneasily on him � or maybe it sat uneasily with her that he was genuinely worried about her. She wasn�t used to being the focus of that kind of concern. �I will be,� she assured him. �It�s just a matter of time, right?� She gave him a half-smile which he returned. Without thought, she reached out and grasped his upper arm, giving it a quick squeeze. �Good night, John.� �Good night, Elizabeth.� He stood in the hall until she entered her quarters and closed the door behind her, and she had to shake her head at his protectiveness. He might play the stereotypical Air Force flyboy at times but she was beginning to suspect that, in spite of their occasional clashes, he was as loyal as they came. It was only when she went to change into her pyjamas that Elizabeth realized she was still wearing his jacket. Shrugging it off her shoulders, she held it in both hands for a moment before draping it neatly over the back of a chair. Taking a step back, she regarded the jacket thoughtfully, then turned her back on it and continued to undress. Loyal he may be, but Elizabeth was just starting to understand that he could be a threat to her in other, more personal, ways. She would have to be careful. --end-- back to Atlantis fanfic |