They fell onto the bed in a tangle of limbs, blonde hair and dark, legs and arms rubbing and clasping, clumsy in their need. Neither spoke; something about this forbade speech of any sort. Instead, they gasped and uttered half-formed curses, muttering and laughing as their teeth clashed or as an elbow slammed against the headboard. It was nothing like movies, nothing like stories, nothing like the heated passion that other people imagine. It was graceless fumbling, all quick smiles and nervous gasps and long hair clinging to sweaty faces.
Kirk arched at the initial penetration, mouth forming an �o� of shock. Even slick with lotion from the bathroom, James had large fingers. Fingers that pushed at him, stretched him in ways he wasn�t meant to stretch. It burned a little and he cried out, but he didn�t pull away. Behind all the nervous amusement in James�s eyes, there was a slow burning lust, and Kirk wanted that all to himself.
The discomfort eased and then there was a second finger, and Kirk squealed. It was familiar and yet completely new at the same time. He�d never thought that one day he would be the one down on the mattress, two thick fingers inside him, fingers scrabbling at the sheets. Was it like this for women? Would it be like this every time? God, he hoped not. Then James�s fingers crooked.
The first time he and James had been together, he hadn�t heard himself scream. He�d been too wrapped up in his own pleasure to focus on any sensation that wasn�t connected to his climax. This time, he heard himself plain as day, his voice rising in a desperate wail that shocked both him and James. Something� James had done something to him when those fingers had shifted. James realized it too, and his fingers moved again.
Pleasure flooded Kirk�s body and he dimly heard James laughing as he thrashed against the bed, begging for more. He felt like a slut, like if he didn�t get more he would die. Insane, and frightening. Nothing should ever feel like this did, but James wasn�t stopping and now there were three fingers inside him, curling and pressing and stretching, and every breath came faster and faster.
And then, just before he could come, it stopped as suddenly as it had started. Kirk whined high in his throat and reached down to rub his abdomen, wondering why he felt so empty. It didn�t seem right that what had felt so strangely unnatural only moments before was now being regarded as a loss. It was true, though. He wanted more. He started to stutter out James�s name, but before the first syllable left his lips, James was between his legs, pushing in.
Kirk screamed again, and kept screaming as James kept sliding in. It felt like it would never end, that he would die still feeling James press deeper and deeper into his body. It was an obscene sensation, raw and desperate and uncomfortable in a way that made Kirk squirm for more. He wanted James to keep going, to push in until he split Kirk in two and remade him into something beautiful.
There was a moment, then, where James stopped, and Kirk was dimly aware that their hips were pressed together, that James was fully inside him. Their eyes met and for that split second, Kirk knew why he had been so reluctant before. He was so open now, completely vulnerable physically and emotionally, and James knew it. James always knew and probably always had known. But if he was left unprotected, so was James, and Kirk could see the need in his vivid blue eyes.
All of that in a second, and then James was hooking Kirk�s legs over his shoulders and his hips were rolling. In and out, back and forth, and it felt like every stroke went deeper, touched him in places that he�d never even known were there. They moaned together, the rising chorus of their voices punctuated by the soft slapping of flesh on flesh as James moved faster, prick slicing into Kirk�s willing body.
Then James�s hips shifted and his cock was dragging against that spot that his fingers discovered. Kirk screamed again, louder this time, and James laughed, whispered �oh my god� and kept moving. Once, twice, and then Kirk was undone. He felt himself clamp down on James, heard James swear and laugh again, breathless and needy this time, and then his hearing fuzzed as blood rushed to his head.
It might have been seconds, it might have been hours. Kirk came back to himself slowly, eyes fluttering open. There was a sticky warmth on his belly and between his legs, and a solid weight on his chest. James stirred groggily, arms shifting, and Kirk knew he was about to get pushed away. It was fine, though. He�d had James once, made James love him at least for those few precious seconds. It was all he could ask.
But James�s arms twined around him, and James�s face burrowed against his neck, lips forming words on Kirk�s skin. It took a moment for them to register, James�s breathy whisper barely audible over his own heavy breathing. Stay here� It wasn�t the rejection that Kirk had been expecting, nor was it the devotion he�d been desperately hoping for. It was, however, perfectly James.
Sighing softly, he nodded and settled against James�s chest. He would stay, for a while at least.
