God gave me a mountain to stand on
I looked into the heavens and sang Billy Joel Songs with the angels
Then with a great gust of wind
You blew me off

So, God gave me a 52 foot yaht and put me in the middle of the sea
I made a Pina Coolada and laid out on the deck
But then you dipped your straw in the water and sucked up the water
Left me high and dry

This time, God handed me a set of wings
I raced a bald eagle, and had a picnic lunch on a cloud
You put on your hunting cap and rifle
Shot me Down

Next, God built me a house, a great big one!
I got a cup of coffee, sat on the couch and turned on Oprah
Then you huffed and puffed and blew it over
Took the rug out from under my feet

So, God gave me the keys to a monster truck
I drove it down the freeway, passing cars left and right with the loud roar of the engine
You pushed me right off the road

and I fell
and I was falling and falling and falling
jumped out of the car
and kept falling
nothing below
except blackness

So, God reached out and have me the end of a piece of rope
I tied a know and held on, as the saying goes
You held something out in your hands
A wicked smile gleams across your face
Matching the metallic gleam of…

Please put your sissors down, don’t
Cut
Me
Off