LaLa. [March 30 05]  3:30 PM

Well, let's see ... first off I thank God for waking me up everyday so I can be productive and active. I feel good and on top of everything, being productive and active owns depression really good :D. Thanks to Kon'nie for coding all these freaken sites for me. Our design company will be up soon. Thanks to my Aunt Judi (she is theee best). Thanks to my mom for not going ballistic on me, cause I feel all old and chits. Ok enuff thanks! haha.. let's see drank last nite again... that was fun cuz it made Doom 3 the tightest game in the universe, which it is not. It's exceptionally good next to Half-Life 2 :). Just to clear things up with some friend's 'I drink cause it's fun' nothing else. Well imma chill on drinking becuz I hate waking up in the middle of the night and my stomach hurts like crazy. To most of you who thinks I'm still depressed. NO I AM NOT! I've been over that for awhile now ... say like 2 -3 months? Yea well there are times when you must go on and obviously things are good for me now. Let's see number 2, oh YEA I'm seriously craving for cheesecake so I will go hunting for it tonite ;). Hmmm, man one of the supervisor's at work is pretty cute. Got her name and introduced myself :P. Can I get in trouble if I decide to talk to her? haha. I dunno maybe it's not a good idea to be with anyone since I have no car, girls these day's it's all about status... to them! Hopefully I can find someone that can see past those thing's and know what's deep down inside? :) Well San Francisco tomorrow, whack but I get to see my Aunt and it's always fun to kick it with a lady who's open minded, funny, and just plain at cool. Linn out ;). BTW KON I WANT MY COMMENT BOX!!!! :D

Whatever Helps Me [March 29 05]  2:36 AM

Well, back to the beginning. But this time it's just somethin else I guess. As I think of it, I don't think twice now I just think a lil harder and a lil less and not think at all so I really know what's up, really I was a quiet person... still am, but I guess this show's more of my thought's. Sometime's I forget why I write here, but then again... I just do it just to look back on my day's :). "There's something gone and I believe this thing's gone forever. Nite.

Massacre Weekend [March 28 05]  11:56 AM

Let's see, had one day off. I was productive and got some things accomplished. Maybe, I drink a little too much now days :P. Woodward was whack as shit. I had more fun kicking it with everyone in  the front of Anthony's house. Me and Malitha snaked Anthony's mom when she came around. (Basically hid our 32 ounce beer bottles), I'm surprised she didn't see them because of the way she popped up next to us, instead she went on testing our intelligence on the communists looking flag hung on her roof. Oh did I say Woodward was whack as shit!? oh yea. Basically right now I'm looking for a full time job and a part time job so I can be pulling in like 50 - 70 hours more in a week of work. $$$$ for immigrant status :(. Full time job and part time job to avoid talking or getting in contact with my mom, really I don't know what her problem is at times and I try not to disrespect her cuz she is my mom. Yup, all I can look forward to is working, going out, theeee gym and hopefully I can squeeze in the enjoyment of all my freaken video games I haven't touched or bought and I want to play!!! 

Work Was Easy [March 26 05]  12:56 AM

So.. work was interesting yesterday, met someone I haven't seen in like 9 years, I made up my own rebutalls while workin, seen a couple of cute girls at work :P, uhhhh let's see James is a slut cuz he never wants to go to the gym when I want to. "Lazy ass." Um... got my mind off my mom being a lagger and wasting lots of time while life could foward in better ways for her and her children. made like 72 bucks in 6 hours of work... what else can I ask for in a half good half shitty day. I guess I can round it off like division numbers to... a GOOD day :). So basically I think to myself... NAN  NI???? Good nite everyone. 

Great Focken Day [March 25 05]  2:12 PM

So I go to DMV and try to take my drive test, it turns out my mom knew that her registration papers are expired and never came in the mail, right after I get my appointment pushed back a whole month, she goes and files and gets the registration papers???? WTF IS THAT ?!??!?!? man on top of that she has freaken commy blood in her. Always yelling for no reason, always getting heated, and talks mad shit on me for no apparent reason ??? WTF IS THAT ??!?!?!. .. oh and because of this shit I had to reschedule my eye appointment for the 7th time wow great shit! another 2 month's wait.. that's a total of almost 5 months wait for an eye appointment, because my mom can't handle shit for herself and her kids. 

People I know can be Stupid [March 25 05]  1:55 AM

If you tell me to do something you better know what the fuck I been through. Get that through your thick dome. On a side note Kon's back from some comp explosion incident ;). Good Nite.

Hmmm... [March 24 05]  2:33 AM

Talking to someone.......... that I thought was gone forever. :)

Freaken A [March 22 05]  5:13 AM

It's really late... or should I say early??? Who the freak knows. I haven't had any sleep since me and James were studying for the test for our job when we got back to my house at 10 PM. We some what concluded our memory sucks cause of all missed out mentality training (cough school). Owell back into training ;). Memorizing all that stuff was easy but it's tricky. I forgot to do hella shit loads of stuff cause of the busy day. " WHACK " well looking forward to what to do on the weekend besides working out and getting in shape :D. Let's see, house is finally clean cause of all the little works on it with me and Son. Plus our jungle in the front yard and back yard is starting to look like a non-ghetto lawn, that got fixed. :P Man there's still so much to do, but with work now I gotta manage my time. Bleh I need my glasses and ...... Yay license on Friday. Damn I never been happier. Ha, I just type down whatever is on my mind is this freaken blog :P. Maybe I should be more organized wit my writing. Good nite everyone.

Fun Week, Fun overall, Lots of Wow's Lately [March 20 05]  10:13 PM

Ok, let's see me James, Son, Dara, right? we been drinking a lot lately. More then the typical average. Shit gets hella funny when we drink especially when we have nothing else to do. I was down in San Francisco on Thursday, turns out its Saint Patrick's day. Well...TOO many mix drinks = bad for my stomach. I feel all hot and spinnnnnnnyyyyy, it's tight :D. I been doing these sessions of 3 - 4 day periods of drinking and drinking and other stuff :P that will be unmentioned. Umm.. on a side note work starts 2morow, I'm excited that I can start somewhere :) and I'm not really excited cuz I want to get more sleep stay away from smoking, people that smoke, and drinking for a long while. Unless it's for fun ;). Linn - out.

Friday [March 18 05]  5:51 PM

Well, it's been awhile since I wrote. Good and really bad thing's had happened, but gotta move on with what I'm doing. On a side note Saint Patrick's Day is tight when asian people like me mix in with the Irish and drinkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk, ha! (thought) > Trying to figure out where and who to hang out with tonite :D Whoever wants to hang out, you know where to hit up :)

Self Reflection [March 9 05]  4:07 PM

I woke up with a really bad thought and some other crap that is bothering me, on top of that Kon you are theeee slut of all time. Enough said. Well this entry is just to say I've gotten rid of all that anger and sadness in me which created who I was for the past 5 - 7 months. Being emotionally hurt and sad. I've moved on so I can just not think about that one person. I guess you know what's up and how I feel for you. Other then that I still have feelings for you, but you make me feel like it's wrong that I feel this way, I mean most of the problems that we went through, I only asked questions to be honest and you would just blow up on me and make me feel guilty for telling what is on my mind and it's wrong, especially when you said it was ok I can always talk to you about anything so, really I don't know anymore. I'm always wrong in your eyes. Sigh forget it. I just wanted to you to know what is on my mind, no purpose no reason to it, just only how I felt about all that. I just hope we can go back to how we were as friend's and not be angry at each other for stupid stuff. On top of that I am happy with what I do and where I am, but if you ever need anyone to talk to I am here :). Oh did I mention Kon is a slut???

I Just Realized ... [March 9 05]  1:25 AM

that til this point in time, nothing I said and did... mattered haha.. Well G'nite doOd'z.

Not Much to Say Today [March 8 05]  9:00 PM

Justincase
"Without You"
(feat. Michelle Branch)

It's been two weeks
Three days long
I'm all alone since you've been gone
I can't keep myself from asking why
Just wanna see my reflection
In your eyes

Just know that I'm with you
And what you feel
I feel it too

I'm feeling lately
I'm going crazy
Wondering how I'll go on without you
I keep on trying
Slowly dying
Thinking about how I need you here with me

I wear your shirt
The scent of you
Reminds of the night that we became two
There's nothing else 
That feels the same
Everyday there's sun, it feels just like rain

Just know that I'm with you
And what you feel
I feel it too

If you think it's easy for me
Well, you're wrong
Sometimes I'm weak and baby you know
I'm not that strong

You're in New York
And I'm in L.A.
There's so much to tell you
Words I need to say
But your phone keeps ringing
[ringing, ringing]

I need you here with me

How will I go on without you?

It's been two weeks
Three days long
I'm all alone since you've been gone

Good Laff Be4 Sleep - [March 8 05]  4:08 AM

TranquiI ImagE (4:02:44 AM): no
TranquiI ImagE (4:02:47 AM): sick of ur face
TranquiI ImagE (4:02:50 AM): but i dont care
TranquiI ImagE (4:02:53 AM): :D
WaskleweeWabbit (4:02:54 AM): omg
WaskleweeWabbit (4:03:01 AM): u have just activated asshole kon

Ok, Work Out Time? - [March 7 05]  8:47 PM

Started working out more often, adding today also. Blah blah. Uhhh anyone wanna challenge me in Tekken 5 call me before you come over, and bring all your skills along ;). Other then that, anyone wanna hit up the beach with us in the summer??? If so hit me up. Awright, everyone Loc out. Peaches.

Late Up At Nite, Cause I Dun Want To Sleep - [March 7 05]  3:57 AM

What a pretty exciting day. Well I found out some stuff I guess I didn't want to hear and on top of that it was really defeating what I been feeling lately. In the past few weeks I actually felt happy waking up and doing whatever I can to be active. Cleaning, learning hella new recipes for cooking, graphic designing, practice drawing, yard stuff, house maintenance (so I can later own this house and rent it out), playing the video games I enjoy like mad crazy, and job searching. Strange to say, I've never felt better in my life (for the first time ever!). I guess the thought was starting to defeat this nirvana. Other then that everything is naturally gravy and the shits haha. I try not to let anything take this away, but I guess once in awhile there's that one little sadness of my past that creeps on me. I've drowned that sadness and now I'm wondering why it just comes around the corner to piss me off (more like haunt me). I can hint it's particularly a person of my past I cherish, but that person particularly isn't talking to me in the mean time, I guess it makes feel like I'm a idiot while it hurts also, but oh well, I deserve it, right? :) Well other then that I had a fun day buggin Leny and her cousin Mary. :P Well on to some more graphic design, idea brainstorming, and hopefully some sleep. And on to life news, I'm so freaken excited to get my license to drive :D. Btw Kon probably got hit by a mini meteor, cuz.... he just disappeared ??? Good Night, everyone!

Cooking Is the Yummy :D - [March 5 05]  8:23 PM

Ok, so a few month's ago when I went to visit my Aunt in San Fran, I happened to telecopy (my word I made up) this recipe she made. I mean when I ate it I was like omg this is hellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllla gooooooooooooooooodddddddddddddddddd. So I basically watched her make it. Recipe happened to be like 4 - 5 ingredients. So now I make it when I got the mad munchies and its freaken the shizzles ! :D. Well today sucked and so did last nite. Well last nite was cool, I just remember yappin off with Dara and James and this girl that turned my whole uncut lemon in to a sliced lime and dropped it into my Corona, she was magacian due to the fact most of us were all un-sober ! Haha. She was funny because she kept asking me to call her a "Rock Star." I kept telling her oh well you ever think about being a porn star ? You sure look like one. Ha! She was cute tho :P. Ummm, today was just a whack day, now I gotta go figure out how everything is gonna turn out because my mom is acting like a truck. Well Peach out.

Up Late Like Theeee Old Day's - [March 2 05]  3:16 AM

I guess I'm back to staying up late. Sometimes depression strikes when I'm up this late, but then again I'm always listening to all this great music I got. I've always considered being a DJ for the music I like; Trance, Vocal Trance, Hard Trance , Progressive Trance. I really like this type of music while almost all my friend's hate it. If ever take this road in DJ'ing this type of music I want to move to Europe and stay there permanently. Really I don't care about being rich, I just care about having enough to make me, my mom, and family happy. Money isn't everything, but I guess it can be at times when I really need it. I just don't want money to be a problem in life, mainly because all of my mom's brother's, sister's hate each other here. Cause? Money.

Sometimes when I think about my life in general I come to realize I really hate my past, there's actually no good memories, I mean if there was a good memory each good memory would be canceled by something terrible or horrible, which is funny .. cancels the good memory which make it neutral or not there. Well now everything is actually starting anew. I'm really happy for that, that I can start fresh and forget every horrible thing that's happened to me. I have faith in God and my attorney to take me away from all that grief I had for almost all of my life. There so much to say in my mind. Many thanks to my Aunt Judi. She's made a huge difference in my life, which I will never forget. All I can say is she's an awesome lady. To this person. The one that showed me that there's is hope in my life , but that person shall be nameless. She's actually showed me that I am a ass at times. Which isn't me. I guess I let my suffering eat me up and I took it out on her.  I am truly sorry for that, you just don't know how bad and shame I feel for myself. Stupidity struck me hard and I wish it didn't. I'm not sure if this person hates me now or what not, but I know we aren't talking much any more :/. Oh well whatever hurts can only make me get up and keep moving, no matter how hard the blow is. I won't say what feelings are there cause she knows, and I know, but now I'm just picking up my own head and going on with this life. Whatever makes me happy right ? :). Thank you for everything you've done with and for me, you don't know how much it means to me. That will always be with me and in my heart. But, yup it's getting hella late. This music by Oceanlab with Justine Suissa is crazy sick! I can't stop listening to it, but everything that has a beginning has an end. This is my closure today. 

Loc smashing out ! Good nite everyone. Dream til you can't stop dreaming. :P

Loc > DMV Written Test - [March 1 05]  3:24 AM

Let's just say Loc owned the DMV written test missing two, one step closer to bliss and out of the sorrowful days :). Today I decided to write a bit more since it was a cool dull day. I sat and did nothing but play games. On top of that Devil May Cry is tight as shit. I noticed I lost another 12 pounds in the last 2 weeks, which is freaken strange cuz I eat twice a day, sometimes three times a day (full meals). Maybe my metabolism has finally stopped being an idiot and decided I shouldn't gain weight I don't need :P, laff. It's hard to not to think about the past at times, but I guess it's better if I shake it off. Ok everyone smashing out peace.