Why? - [February 27 05] 1:18 AM
Why is it that I am who I am.
Haven't Slept Yet ! - [February 25 05] 5:29 AM
Well, I guess something hit me today or some days before not sure, but I feel like a whole new person which is weird. Thank God for that :). Not sure where everything is gonna lead me, but I already know it's going to be a life worthy of interesting things, yay! Good morning everyone.
Long Interesting Day - [February 23 05] 9:12 PM
Long Coo day with like 2 hours of sleep. I actually felt good and had fun today just doing nothing but clean, haha. On top of that I realized my days are really off, especially on these entries. Laff. G'nite everyone.
Big Sigh... - [February 22 05] 2:00 AM
Everything is said easier then done. I have faith and belief in what everyone tells me about anything, mainly that things gets better any general for me. But then again it only gets worse. Day by day , minute by minute, second by second, no matter how hard I try. There is no other choice but to continue. I live in this reality where everything is already messed up. Better if one day if I do decide to have kids it's better not to bring them into a harsh reality where everything is taken for granted and life itself is just bitter as much as sour. I wouldn't want them to grow up in a world of grief and sorrow. And I understand that completely.
Beginning Of a Bright Ass Day - [February 22 05] 2:14 PM
WTF? was the thought that came into my mind when I woke up today. Weird ass dreams that don't make sense but it's blurryness and horrid graphical image that my brain displayed for me. Laff. Only one thing came to mind and that was a quote from my Aunt. It started off with someone talking about guarantee's in life so she went off saying "Nothing in life is guaranteed except death, so live it and shut the fuck up." I couldn't stop laughing cuz I understood what was said. I even added in my own opinions and said. Hey at least u ain't living the immigrants life. I was chillen with her in San Fran. last Thursday, turned out to be a coo day. Oh btw don't ever watch 'Cabin Fever,' a terrible low budget film. Remember 'PANCAKES!' Kon *cough*. "Everyone lacks morals in this present time."
Continuing What I Started - [February 21 05] 3:48 AM
I started journal writing the time I spent in jail around last year of April. I've always been against journal writing, web blogs, dairies, displayed on the internet because I believe that what's expressed from one's self is to be kept personal, but that's for person to decide right? Well I started my own reflective writing to blow off steam, from everything thing that's happened to me in the last year and so forth, basically terrible shit. It's ultimately harsh that I got a physical and mental beating from that time period. I guess typing these thoughts can help me mentally, because writing thoughts down on blank sheets of paper is only written, past tense, and forgotten. So I decided to put them on website's just to have an excuse to design another graphical image. It's better not to hold it in or to talk to anyone about my problems because I always get negative results (mainly shit that's obvious that I already know retold to me). I am honest with my feelings and with to those that are important to me. Telling a lie creates another lie. It's demented how people can play a game of deceit with me in twisted way's. Imagine deceit within deceit from a person. That's really difficult to depict, making it really hard to trust anyone I know. Deceit, lies, backbiters, and haters, what else more can reality ask for? Say good bye to that negative and add the positive "+" I can say ... Ha! It help's. Well I once knew a person that I could talk to about anything, but not sure where she went. I thought I had a few, but many of them just dissed me for no apparent reason I realized they're full of shit. I guess there are other thing's that can help me suppress the negativeness in me. But only I can decide that right ? Intro for today...