So one day after work, the lifeguard was hanging out with some buddies in an apartment, drinking beer and being bored in general. After the 5 of them were suffientially drunk, around 9 pm, they got the idea to go visit a friend in Washington. (Keep in mind they live in Jacksonville.) Two of the guys had a friend up there they liked to party with, and the lifeguard was so wasted he just thought it would be fun to go shake the president's hand. So they pile into the 4-door sedan and get on Interstate 95 North...a few hours later, they stop at a gas station to buy another case of beer, and it's the lifeguards turn to drive. Wearing his dark shades since early that morning on the beach, he gets behind the wheel and back onto the highway, flooring it, and surprisingly not killing them...I think he's had practice driving that drunk. Suddenly, the guys notice a sign of the highway they are on...95 South. That doesn't seem right, Washington is above them. Being too drunk and impatient to wait for the next exit to get off and turn around, the lifeguard decideds to do a U-turn over the median and onto the other side of the highway. Now, this isn't an impossible feat, but inorder to get across the concave median, you are suppose to drive at a diagnol, otherwise the car snaps in half...literally. Being so drunk, the lifeguard didn't realize this and made it half way over when they all heard a snap...the transmission and engine had seperated from one another! Well, they definitly weren't just sitting in the car all night, they were just walk to find more transportation. They flung the leftovers from the case of beer into the woods and began walking along the side of the highway. Then a dark pickup pulled up beside them and slowed. The 5 drunk men gazed into cab and suddenly the driver flicked a Bic lighter and they all saw the silluette of a bear of a man wearing a ten gallon cowboy hat and puffing on a cigerette. Without saying a word, they all piled into the bed of the truck and the man dropped them off at the next exit where they found a hotel to crash in. The next morning they returned to the scene of the crime to find the beer they had "disposed of" about 5 feet from the car...so much for hiding the evidence!
I'm just glad none of my adventures were this illegial...yet...
