The Merriment of Life

The feet of angels
tread upon my skin.
How quickly they become devils
and madness overtakes.
Why do I persist?
Why do I try?
Happiness turns to pain,
sorrow  to joy,
and back again.
Only one is a broad circle --
not the first and not the last --
my fault all I know
yet not cencede to say.
Truth is hidden behind lies to protect.
Light changes to dark
and dark to dawn
and I wonder when and what next.
Poems Continued......
The Pain

The Pain could end,
it could stop now,
one quick thrust or one small swallow.
Yet when I try you hold me back.
Why...I yell to silent ears
for you won't listen.
You only hug and cry and know;
know how I feel and why I do this.
Yet the pain continues.
All my fault
and yet no one's.
I was born with this pain it seems
and it will never go away
not until I go
and you won't let me.
Yet somewhere I can let go
of life, of pain, of this.
I can never say goodbye.
I can never leave.
I know now.
This is my burden, my pain, my life
and it cannot end.


Disclaimer: Just as a note...I am not suicidal. That's not totally what this is about. It just about emotional pain. ok. Just wanted to clear that up.
The Reawakening

My heart pounds,
my breathe growns strong
and I leave.
I leave the shadows behind.
I awaken only to find,
I have not left
just have been misplaced:
hours, minutes, seconds
never to be told,
never known to me.
Hanging precarioulsy between
life and death.
I pause and breathe.
My heart joins,
the crisis past
only to return
unknown when next
it will return.
Today, tonite, never.
Will it end me?
I will never know
until.....
Pain's Memoirs

I sit and watch others.
The Pain I had
now belongs to them.
My compassion runs deep
for I know their pain,
their tears and heartache
but I know -- as happened with me --
it will pass and the sun
will return to the day.
All it takes is a friend
or two
to make you laugh or smile
and the pain will lessen
with time and smiles.
All it takes is trust in time
and trust in you.
I know for I have been there.
This poem is one of my personal favorites......

In the Dark of the Night

In the dark of the night
the devil yawns
collecting souls
for his own personal goals.

Hiding in the silence,
she comforts the night
and prays for the dawn.

How safe is the safest hideout?
How far is safe enough?
To close is death
and there is no sanctum.

She cowers and prays for the light
knowing it will not come soon enough.
Shrieking breaks the silence
as the purest darkness approaches.

Yet just as the end closes in
a reprieve arrives -- light --
the Dawn. A new and glorious Day!
Never before so happy to see the sun
she yells in glorious triump
then grows silent
for she knows the battle will begin agian --
when the sun sets an the darkness returns.
Anger

Anger and rage fill me.
They stop my breath
and kill my soul.

I can't fight it,
so I try to hide it
but it bursts from beneath its vail of decept.

I explode and scream.
I feel the blood run down my hand
and see the cavity from my knuckles.
Just empty plyboard
but an unyielding mass fit to purge the soul.

I claim -- better than a human
my fist to hit --
and suddenly I cry.
Anger spent,
I know my wrong
and await the punishment of my soul.
I have failed once again
to hide
my Anger.
Want more....
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Go Back One....
All poems Copyright 2000
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