Author's notes: Huge thanks to my beta reader Jen. You rock!
Jing-Mei walked into the ER and went straight for the admit desk. "Randi? Where's Dr. Carter?"
"Check the board." Randi said as she filed some charts.
Jing-Mei rolled her eyes but did as Randi suggested and found that John was in Exam 1. Good. Hopefully he'd have the time to speak with her.
Poking her head in she saw John next to a bed where a woman was sleeping. "John?"
Looking up he smiled. "Hey Deb. Everything okay?"
"Can we talk?"
"Now?"
"Yeah it's important."
"Alright. Malik, keep an eye on Mrs. Fields and come get me when her tests get back."
"Sure Carter."
John stepped out into the hall. "Okay what's going on?"
"Let's go in the lounge." Jing-Mei said.
John followed her with a curious expression on his face. Once they were seated he repeated his earlier question. "What's going on?"
"I have something I need to tell you but I'm not sure how."
"Deb you can tell me anything, you know that."
"This isn't about me which makes it more difficult but I think, no I know, that I have to tell you or it'll be worse."
"Okay Deb, you're starting to scare me."
"It has to do with Abby. More specifically it has to do with Abby's daughters."
"What about them?"
"I did some checking. Abby was pregnant before she left Chicago. To be exact, she was three months pregnant."
"What?"
"There are other things. Hope's blood type is O- and a few weeks ago when Abby's sitter brought them here because Faith was vomiting I heard Abby ask Doug if her white count was normal. When Doug asked if there was any reason she was worried she said there was a paternal history of leukemia."
John felt sick. "Is there anything else?"
"Maybe. Do you have that picture of you and your sister from when you were little?"
"It's in my locker. Why?"
"I want to do a comparison." She took out a picture of Hope she'd 'borrowed' from Abby's locker when no one had been looking. John handed her his picture and put them side-by-side.
"You might want to look at this." Jing-Mei said quietly.
John looked over his friend's shoulder at the pictures that lay side-by-side on the table in front of her. The picture of him and Barb showed him as a baby. The picture that Deb had laid next to it showed a baby that could have been him.
"Who is that?"
"Hope." Jing-Mei said quietly.
"How long have you known?"
"I don't. All I have are pictures and theories and a blood type. The real answer has to come from Abby."
John nodded as he touched the other picture gently. "Is there anything else?" He looked at Deb just in time to see her look down. "Deb?"
"Faith's middle name is Lucille."
"Lucille?" John's mind started to click away. Lucille. Lucille. He froze. Lucy. "Do you know where Abby is?"
"She's not working today. I think I heard her say something to Carol about taking the girls for a ride and then they were gonna go to the carnival at the docks with Dave."
"Dave?"
"Yeah."
In his mind's eye a slew of images started to slideshow. He saw Abby and Dave hanging out by the admit desk, them leaving together after a shift, sharing a laugh, helping each other with a patient, and last but not least Abby giggling over something Dave was saying about a picture on Abby's locker door. It had been a picture of her-his-their daughters.
"I gotta go." Carter ran out the door.
"John, don't do anything stupid." Jing-Mei called after him. "Please don't do anything stupid." She whispered.
"Dave." Abby called out.
"Hey there you are. Sorry I'm late. I got pulled in on something at the last minute." He sat down next to Faith who was making a mess of her dinner. "Hey Faith. What are you eating?"
"A burger with ketchup."
"A lot of ketchup." Dave said. He looked over at Abby who was eating and Hope who was making a French fry house.
"You gonna eat?" Abby asked.
"Yeah. I'll go get something and be right back."
"We'll be waiting."
John got back into his car. Abby was definitely not at her home. That meant she was already at the carnival. He drove his car down the streets back towards the hospital. Just as he stopped at a light his cell phone rang.
"Hello?" He said in an irritated voice.
"John? It's me."
"Ava, hi."
"Hi. Where are you?"
"In the car."
"On your way home I hope."
"Not exactly."
"John did you forget something?"
"Did I?"
"Dinner tonight with Michael and his newest girlfriend. I know you don't like the idea of Michael eating with us but you did say you'd be here."
"I have to cancel. Something came up."
"Something medical?"
"Personal."
"What?"
"I can't tell you right now."
"You can't tell your wife something personal?" Ava asked in a peeved tone.
"Ava we'll talk when I get home. I gotta go."
"John, don't you dare-"
John hung the phone up. He had another ten minutes before he reached the pier. Ever since Deb had started talking about all the indicators of the paternity of Abby's daughters his mind had been on overload. Now it was starting to clear. He thought of all the times Abby and Chuni or Carol had traded stories. How Carol and Abby had teased each other about Faith's crush on Doug. But what annoyed him more and more was how close Dave seemed to them. Not to mention Susan and Luka.
Susan.
John's mind came to a grinding halt. Did Susan know?
Only one way to find out.
"Rollercoaster next?"
"No. I don't want to deal with puking three-year-olds." Abby said.
"You're no fun."
"What the Ferris wheel?" Abby suggested.
"Sounds good to me. What about you two?" Dave said to the little girls.
Both nodded. They liked the big wheel, as they called it.
"Let's go buy some tickets."
John methodically scanned the crowded pier. Laughing people surrounded him but they didn't matter to him. He was searching for only one person and he wasn't giving up till he found- There she was! She was in line for a ride.
"Abby!" He called hoping to stop her before she got onto the Ferris wheel. He broke into a run. "Abby!"
She turned around. "Carter? What are you doing here?"
"I need to talk to you."
"Right now?" She rose an eyebrow.
"Yeah. It's important."
"Hi John." A little voice said from lower.
John looked down. Faith was smiling up at him. "Hey Faith. How are you?"
"I'm fine." She turned to her twin. "That's the man that helped me find Mommy yesterday."
John looked at Hope too. Those eyes. Oh God. "Abby, right now."
"Okay. Dave can you take them on the ride?"
"Sure. C'mon guys. Mom's gonna talk to Dr. Carter here while we go on the ride."
"Be good." Abby said. She stepped out of line. "Okay what's so important?"
"Over here." John took her hand and led her to a darker part of the pier not so populated.
"Carter what is going on?"
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Tell you what?"
"About them."
"Carter what are you talking about?"
"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?"
"Because I'm not."
"Not now. Then. Before you left Chicago after we slept together and you proceeded to tell me that you needed space. Tell me something, as you were so cavalierly letting me leave your apartment did you know you were pregnant?"
"No." Abby said. "I didn't know till a few weeks later. By then you'd stopped talking to me."
"Don't you dare put this on me. You made this decision all on your own."
"Who told you?"
"Well it wasn't Susan. Or Luka." The expression on her face confirmed his suspicions. "So they did know."
"Luka just found out."
"And Susan?"
"Since about two months after I met her."
"You know Luka I understand. He has no loyalty to me. But Susan and I were friends first. I would've thought that she would've told me instead of helping you lie."
"Don't be mad at her."
"Don't tell me what to feel right now."
"Fair enough." Abby said.
"And you wanna know the really ironic part?" John asked.
"Sure."
"The thought did cross my mind yesterday but I dismissed it. You wanna know why? Because I stupidly thought that no matter what our problems were that you would never lie to me about something this important."
Abby looked away. "John-"
"No. Don't apologize. Don't say you're sorry because the way I feel, I wouldn't believe you."
"What do you want me to say then?"
"I just wanna know how."
"How?"
"Yeah. How could you lie to me? How could you take yourself and them to live in foreign countries on army bases? My God Abby you had them growing up in war zones!" John said incredulously.
"They were safe. We were safe."
"You would've been safer here."
"Says who? Be realistic, John. Better yet, do what you're telling me I wasn't. Be honest! Look where we work. Look at what we see every day. There are no guarantees in life no matter where you are living. Look at that little-"
"You had them growing up without me." John interjected quietly.
"And I can't change that." Abby said. "But what would have happened if I had told you back then?"
"We could've worked something out."
"Worked something out? John, I am a recovering addict, you are a recovering addict, my mother was bipolar, and you have a history of cancer in your family. If we had taken this to court or if we take this to court, we wouldn't be allowed to raise dogs!"
"It wouldn't have happened like that."
"Why? Cause your last name's Carter? Get over yourself. Your last name could be Cosby and they still would think we were too unstable to raise kids. Especially considering I'm the one who turned you in for your drug use."
"It wouldn't have happened like that because I wouldn't have taken you to court."
"Are you going to now?" Abby asked after a pause.
"I don't know. But I'm not gonna let you keep me out of their lives anymore." John said. "And that is a promise." He glanced over to the Ferris wheel before he left Abby standing there.
Ava looked up when the door to the apartment opened. "Well, finally. I thought you weren't ever coming home tonight."
"Where's Michael?"
"I gave him and Diane a rain check. Told them I wasn't feeling up to company." Ava folded her arms in front of her. "So?"
"So?"
"Where have you been? What was so important?"
"It's a long story."
"I have time."
John sighed. He knew he had to tell Ava sooner or later. He just would've liked a little more time to prepare himself for the task. Like, oh say, a month or two.
"John? I'm waiting."
"Right. Ava, I went to the pier."
"The pier? Why?"
"There's something I need to tell you."
"By all means."
"We got a new nurse in the ER about two months ago."
"You're having an affair?"
"No! No. No I'm not having an affair. This nurse is someone I know from when she worked in the ER before."
"Who is she?"
"It's Abby Lockhart."
"What? Ab- What?!?!"
"I didn't want to upset you or make you think you had anything to worry about."
"So you thought lying was a better idea?"
"Yes. No. Look Ava, there's more."
"More? What more is there?" Ava stared at him.
"Abby was pregnant when she left four years ago."
"And she didn't tell you that one either right?"
"No."
"Well then maybe the child isn't yours John."
"They're mine. Believe me."
"They?"
"Two girls."
"Great so your ex-fling never told you that you were father to her children? That is what you're telling me, right John?"
"She wasn't a fling Ava." John said in a controlled voice.
Ava nodded. "That's right, she wasn't, was she? She was at one point the person you trusted more than anyone else. Interesting thing to call someone who lied to you for so long." Ava said before she went into her bedroom shutting the door behind her.
John sank onto the couch and put his face in his hands. This would work out. It would. It had to.
Abby closed the door to the girls' bedroom and slowly went back into the living room. Dave was sitting on the couch. He was waiting for her.
"Hey." She said quietly. "Can I get you something? Coffee? Tea?"
"No. I just want to talk to you."
"Right." Abby nodded. She sat down in the big comfy armchair that she'd fallen in love with while she and Susan had been shopping one afternoon. She figured if she had to have this conversation she might as well be comfortable for it. "So you probably want to know what Carter wanted."
"Yeah." Dave nodded. "You looked really upset so I'm curious."
"Naturally." Abby said. "They're his."
"I'm sorry?"
"Faith and Hope are his. He's their father."
"Carter?"
"Yeah."
"And he just found out?"
"Yeah. I don't know who told him but he knows." Abby looked at her hands. "And I'm scared. I know I shouldn't be having this conversation with you but you're here."
"Why shouldn't you be having this conversation with me?"
"Cause you and Carter are family."
"Yeah, he's my brother-in-law. But that almost changed about two months ago. It would've changed if Ava wasn't pregnant."
"Pregnant?"
"You didn't know that?"
"No. Can't say that I did." Abby said.
"Oh. Well anyway, I'm on your side Abby. Ava's my sister but I feel closer to you and your girls right now then I ever have to Ava."
"Thanks Dave."
"Anytime."