Here is the text for all the journaling on my gastric bypass 10 page layout. Included is the text on the tags, which was taken from the messages in my guestbook and message board.
11/3/01 I'm really looking forward to my appointment Monday. I just wish I knew for sure if he will do the surgery. I wish it could be done before Christmas but I know it will most likely be the middle of January. I want to be on my journey. When I think of the anesthesiologist telling me I could die, that scares me, but they tell everyone going into surgery that that's a possibility. I'm already worried about the seats.... will they have seats big enough. I would imagine with lots of large patients they would have thought of that. I could call Paula or Shana and ask them.
11/12/01 Ha!!!!! I realized yesterday that next year I will be able to go up on Jockeys' Ridge. Whoooooooppppppppiiiiiiieeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!! LOL. I won't have to worry about seat belts not fitting. I could go on an airplane if I want. I won't have to worry about classes, having to find another chair.
11/24/01 I GOT APPROVED!!!!!!! I finally got approved. I got my letter saying that my insurance company approved. So, now I can quit worrying. YES!!!!!!!!!!!
11/26/01 I GOT A DATE!!!!!!! Jan. 25th. Now, I can finally feel like it will really happen. It really is!!!! Ha! I remember baseball shirts. I can wear baseball shirts again!!! And belts!! And socks that stay up. Ones that you can buy in any store.
12/7/01 Paula had surgery Tuesday and came through fine. She slept an awfully long time so she still had the tube in her throat when I saw her. I was afraid it would scare me and it did. She wasn't in pain, it just unnerved me. I was seeing her through my kids eyes. I was seeing what they'll see when I have mine. I didn't realize how nervous I was till I cried. I cried on the way to the car. I cried when I got home. I soaked in the tub for only about 20 minutes...highly unusual for me.....and went to bed at 8:00. Ha! I never go to bed before the wee hours of the morning. I didn't get to see Paula the next day, but on Thursday she looked wonderful. And she's supposed to come home today.
12/18/01 Well, I've written all my letters. They will most likely not get read, but at least they're there in case something goes wrong. My goodbyes. I just feel better knowing they're there if needed.
1/19/02 Only 5 more days and a wake up. I'm excited, nervous, excited, scared,excited, anxious, and ...oh, uh, did I say excited? LOL.
1/24/02 I can't believe it!!! It's finally here and I have a sinus thing that might cause them to delay the surgery. Great timing! The nurse said as long as I don't have a fever they should go ahead with it. I don't have one, so far. She said if I'm stuffy they will just suction me. Well, that sounds so grose but I don't care. I just want to do this and get it over with. Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2/1/02 Okay! I'm a Posty now. Postop. I got home Tuesday. I had a rough time, had to stay an extra day. The upperGI xray showed my stomach was not emptying. But after having a bm, the doc said that showed it was. So, I went for another the next day, and that one showed the same, but he had me drink some barium stuff, and it showed that it was going through. So, yippie!!!!! I got to come home. So far, everything I've eaten has agreed with me. I'm still on clear liquids, my Carnation Instant Breakfast, and jello, broth, juice. I made a mistake the other day, left some broth in the pan and just reheated it for supper. WRONG!!!!! I had drank several cups, our little medicine cups, and realized it tasted like fish. It was chicken broth. Well, I'm still burping a fish taste. Won't do that again. But other than that, I've liked what I had to drink. The hardest thing is spacing the time it takes to take all of the pills and vitamins. Can only take 2 and wait 20 minutes to take 2 more. I have several presurgery meds, plus now all the vitamins. My epidural didn't work after surgery, didn't take away the pain,so they finally switched me to a pump. The nurse the first night of surgery had scared me to death. I'd already been afraid of dying, and she kept telling me if I didn't start breathing better, I'd go into respiratory failure. I panicked. I thought for sure I was going to die. I was too sleepy from the Morphine, so I'd sleep but would not breathe deeply. And when that little bitty nurse pulled me out of the bed, I really wanted to kill her. LOL. She was a real witch, she kept saying "you've had surgery, it's GOING to hurt!!!!" Tess was her name. My favorite nurse was Debra. I did not think I could deal with having to let a nurse clean me after a bm, and she made it so much easier for me. She made it easy enough, even though I had said I could not let Mike help me bathe, I asked him to please help me shower. I really never thought I could do that. I've always been so ashamed for anyone to see me. But he also made it easy for me. In fact, it brought us even closer, knowing how much I trusted him. He has been so wonderful, but then, I never thought he'd be anything but. He's just my Godsend. I thank God for him. I couldn't have done this without him. Okay, been sitting at this computer too long, got to move.
2/8/02 Found out the fish taste was from the A&D vitamin. UGH! I'm up to soft foods now. Tried some mashed potatoes last night, but forgot to make them thin, so they came back up. Tried again later and they stayed down. I had my checkup yesterday. I've only gone down 14, but I guess that's better than none. I have this ungodly itch all over my body. They gave me something for it, but it hasn't touched it. I have bloody scratch marks all over me. I'm frustrated. I don't know what to eat. Guess I'll stick with soups and my Carnation Instant Breakfast.
3/13/02 I'm so sorry I have not updated sooner. I've been a little down, having trouble throwing up, not knowing what to eat, just being very confused. But, I have finally made some progress. I have lost 36 pounds, and I've lost 3 inches in my hips and my thighs, 1 in my waist and 2 in my bust. I'm on my way. LOL. Now, if I could just stop throwing up I'd be okay. Also, I finally think I can deal with my numbers. I started at 369, and am now at 333. My goal is 150. Wish me luck.
4/12/02 Once again, I'm sorry it has taken me so long to update. I've lost 53, finally, down to 316. The throwing up is much better, not nearly as often. I can eat most anything now except no beef or soft bread for a few more weeks, till I'm 3 months postop. I don't have much appetite, I can't decide on something nourishing to eat. After throwing up, I can't eat or drink for a few hours or it comes up again. Even ONE drink of water can do it. I can finally get into a size smaller jeans, and a lot smaller blouse. Actually blouses instead of mens' t-shirts. That's soooooo nice. LOL. I'm gonna post pics today. Oh God! LOL.
4/19/02 Hey, finally down 58. It feels good. And I can finally can wear smaller clothes. A good friend from the support group brought me several bags of clothes, I'm going through them all to see just what all I can wear. LOL. This is so much fun!!!!!!!!
5/22/02 I can't believe it's been this long since I wrote. I've lost 74 now, down to 295. I also can't believe I just write that number so easily. LOL. I never could do that before. The throwing up has improved so very much. It's very seldom now, and then only when I really eat too fast. I've dropped down sizes. I can wear "women's" clothes now. LOL. No more mens' t-shirts. Well, except to wear around the house, or clean in, you know. I wear feminine blouses now. Breaking 300 has really done a lot for my self esteem. I look at my arms and think "where did those come from?" LOL. They look so thin. I need to get a current picture. I got into my wedding dress again, and a nice pants outfit I haven't been able to wear for several years. I've lost 6 inches in my hips. Wonderful!!!!! I've lost 4 in my bust, 4 in my waist, 3 in my arms, and 5 in my thigh. It's so wonderful to get daily feedback at work, and at home. I come home from work and walk past Mike and he notices again how much smaller I am. It's wonderful. I would do this again in a heartbeat. The only thing I would change is I would be stronger in my resolve to walk. I still am not walking and I have no excuse. My REASON is my addiction to the computer and my graphics, but that's no excuse. I really need to walk. I sometimes go most of the day without eating, before I realize I haven't. I never feel hunger, so if I'm playing here, I don't think about eating. I make sure when I'm working that I get all my water and lots of protein in, but when I'm home, I forget to drink and eat. I just don't think about eating now. Weird, I know. LOL
6/22/02 I can't believe it has been so long since I updated. LOL.I'm down to 284, lost 85 pounds,but I'm staying there. I haven't thrown up from eating too fast in quite a while, but I have been lately due to nerves. We have a bit of a crisis here at home, and my nerves are really bad. The one thing that has changed though, is I used to turn to food, to deal with it. Now I seem to have to make myself eat. I know I'm not getting enough protein. I did order me some of the ProLab, from Vitalady.com. My hair is really coming out like crazy. I'm getting worried. I don't dare use a brush on it, I use a pic. I use a brush to blow dry the top front, but I just let the rest dry by itself, and then pic it out. I hate it. It's sooooooooooo curly since I can't pull the curl out with the brush while I dry it. Terrelle is going on the 9th of July for his informational meeting and then he will get his appointment with the doc. I hope everything goes okay.
7/8/02 Wow, I'm down 3 more. LOL. Maybe I will hit that century mark before the 23rd. LOL. Just 4 more to go. Oh, I almost forgot!!! We went to the beach yesterday, and I actually wore a bathing suit. LOL. I swore I wouldn't but I did. Of course, I didn't move off that blanket, but I did wear it. LOL.
8/22/02 Hey, I'm getting better,LOL, not so long since my last update. Just lost 4 more pounds since last post. Down 110, so I'm exactly half way there. I started out with 220 to lose. I've lost 12" in my hips, 10" in my boobs, LOL, and I can't remember the rest. I'll try to remember to post it one day. I had a wonderful experience the other day. Last weekend we went to Busch Gardens, and I had actually forgotten about the turnstiles. LOL. How could I have done that? And when we got to them, I felt that old familiar panic. LOL. I had Mike go first, (used to have him go last to cover me from the eyes of the people behind me if I got stuck.) LOL. Well, I walked right through it, and couldn't get this grin off my face. Mike turned around to look at me, knowing what I was going through, and we both burst out laughing, and then I started to cry. I was so glad I had on sunglasses. LOL. It touched me so deeply, to know that I don't have to be afraid of that anymore. And just a few weeks ago, we had a meeting at work, and I used to have to find a chair with no arms. There was only myself and another lady in there at the time, so I tried one of the "skinny" chairs. LOL. I got in it!!!! LOL. Oh, what a high!!! LOL. Now, I never have to be humiliated having to ask for a chair with no arms. Never again. LOL. Okay, I gotta go, just wanted to get this in here.
9/06/02 I'm only down 1 more. I've been having stomach pains when I eat or drink. I find when I'm at home I very seldom drink, while when I'm at work, I drink most of my water. But I'm sooooooooooo tired of the water. I tried some unsweetened tea, put Splenda in it, and that helped. But I still feel so uncomfortable when I eat. I thought I might go back to a liquid diet today while I'm off work. On another note, I found a message board for this webpage. The link is on the first page, so if you want you can leave a message and I can reply. There are messages in the guestbook I could reply to if I had an email address. And on still another note, LOL, Terrell had his appointment Tuesday and the doc said he's a good candidate for the surgery. I'm sooooooooo glad. I love him. I want this same joy for him. We're now waiting to hear if the insurance approves. He has the same insurance as I have so I see no reason he should be turned down. I'm going to make him a webpage, and since he doesn't have a computer, he could access one at the library, but I'm gonna put a message board on the website so he can correspond with anyone wanting to correspond with him. I know several members of OWLS that would love to.
9/19/02 I'm down 120. We're still waiting to hear if Terrelle got approved for his surgery. His page I created for him is at http://www.geocities.com/tdh652002/ We're getting anxious about his approval. It's been 16 days. I think it took mine about 21 days. I was quite sick last Friday. I think I have been using too much OJ for my protein shakes. And not completely "eliminating", as Barbara says, LOL. I was having terrible gas pains, and then it started actually burning my stomach every time I ate or drank anything. I threw up all day, including on the side of the road trying to go to work. Barbara called me in something for the nausea and some Previsid. That seems to have really helped. But she also said I need to take Dulcolax daily, but if I do, it's too much, so I think I may need to adjust that to every other day. I also still have that terrible itch. My stomach is still covered with spots where I scratch till it bleeds.
10/9/02 I'M SOOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!I just measured. LOL. I've lost a total of 55 1/2 inches. LOL. I lost
calf-1
bust-11 1/2
waist-11
hips-15
thigh-9
neck-1 1/2
forearm-1
upper arm-4
ankle-1 1/2
11/17/02 I can't believe it! LOL. Once again. I can't believe I have let this long a time go by before updating. I'm down to 228, down 141 pounds lost. It feels wonderful. Mike and I are going to Warren, Ohio the day after Thanksgiving to meet friends from my gastric bypass support group. I can't wait, I'm so excited. Oh, I see I haven't let you know............Terrelle got approved, and his surgery date is Jan. 15th. I'm taking off that day to be with his family. I love that young man so much. I can't wait for him to have this gift. He's so precious. I seem to be having a bit of trouble with emotions lately, it's like I'm PMSy.
4/5/03 Again, LOL, I am sorry I have not updated sooner. I have been discouraged. I've only lost a few pounds since New Years Eve. I'm fluctuating between 214 and 220. I know I'm not eating right. I need to be eating more regular meals, more meat. It's just hard for me to fit it in with my work schedule. I don't want leftovers, I'd rather eat it fresh, but with me working evenings it's complicated.
6/22/02 I can't believe it has been so long since I updated. LOL.I'm down to 284, lost 85 pounds,but I'm staying there. I haven't thrown up from eating too fast in quite a while, but I have been lately due to nerves. We have a bit of a crisis here at home, and my nerves are really bad. The one thing that has changed though, is I used to turn to food, to deal with it. Now I seem to have to make myself eat. I know I'm not getting enough protein. I did order me some of the ProLab, from Vitalady.com. My hair is really coming out like crazy. I'm getting worried. I don't dare use a brush on it, I use a pic. I use a brush to blow dry the top front, but I just let the rest dry by itself, and then pic it out. I hate it. It's sooooooooooo curly since I can't pull the curl out with the brush while I dry it. Terrelle is going on the 9th of July for his informational meeting and then he will get his appointment with the doc. I hope everything goes okay.
10/9/02 I'M SOOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!I just measured. LOL. I've lost a total of 55 1/2 inches. LOL. I lost
calf-1
bust-11 1/2
waist-11
hips-15
thigh-9
neck-1 1/2
forearm-1
upper arm-4
ankle-1 1/2
LOL. I had no idea!!!!! LOL. I LOVE IT!!!! Uh, can you tell I'm excited? LOL
Posted by Ralph Blessing on September 08, 2002 at 06:20:23:
Lynn,
You go girl!!! LOL
Picked the URL off from one of Mike's messages and was reading through it. YOu are dpoing GREAT! I am sure that you will succeed because you can read it in your writings. There is something that I remember very clearly from my military days, "Tryers try and doers do." And you are defintiely a "DOER."
Take care and hoping to meet oyu one day.
Warmest to Mike.
Ralph & (Becky) Blessing
Posted by Hilde Horton on September 08, 2002 at 08:50:51:
Hi Linda,
just finished reading your journey..incredible reading.
You mention your early struggles and how you have overcome most of them.
So very happy for you and Mike.
Keep up the struggle, it will be well worth it.
Love,
HH
Name : Sondra Date signed : Oct 30 Comment : Hey girl! You are doing a great job. This is all terrific!!! I am so proud of you - from where you were this time last year and where you are today. Love ya :-) Sondra
Name : Alice Date signed : 9-10-02 Comment : Linda, I'm so proud of you! You alredy know you look wonderful but i guess I'll gas your head up some more and let you know again how happy I am for you and how terrific you look!!
Posted by Mary Ellen on April 23, 2003 at 21:22:48:
Congratulations! You are doing great. I am pre-op with date of 6/13/03. You have done a really great job with your web page and updates. I was wondering about that Bavarian concoction you mentioned. Did you make it or did you purchase it?
Thanks for all you honest sharing and info.
Name : Silimtao Comment : Hi Lynn- I came across your page from Delphi. I'm a friend of Dippy's. You're one courageous lady. You look great. I didn't get to the end of your journal (it's 2.35 a.m. now), but it took alot of courage for you to post your diary.
Name : JoAnne: Comment:Way to go. I think that this is the greatest thing to ever happen to you -- ranks # 2 bor three--Mike is #1--Kids & Grandkids are #2 & this is indeed right up there with both of them. Love ya lots--miss you lots.
Posted by Susie Horton on April 02, 2003 at 19:11:38:
Linda,
I just had a wonderful time looking around your website. You look absolutely terrific!!!! Your smile looks even bigger! :-)
Love,
Susie