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| 7-01 What it'll be like Middle school/ Jr. High is one of the most trying and scary times of a kid's life. I mean, all you want to do is grow up, but society won't let you. You try to grow up with a hand pushing you back down and telling you to just enjoy life being a kid. So you wait anxiously for high school, the time when you'll be allowed to grow up, but along the way have huge crushes on that guy you talked to last summer and the one that sits next to you in some class. And you try to dress like the pretty, skinny, popular girls only to be ignored as usual. You act grown up around your friends, but at night cry because you aren't sure you want to grow up and you dream of the day you know what you want. Then, finally you were there, high school. But suddenly things changed, you weren't as na�ve as you had been for the past 3 years. Boys and flirting and trying to be like everyone else just didn't matter as much anymore. Now was your time to have fun and be a stupid kid, right when society wanted you to grow up and get a job. It's funny how things change so quickly, one moment you have a this group of close nit friends and the next, you have a best friend that you met in math class on the first day of school and that group of friends drifts away. You don't want them to, but things have just changed, you've all changed and it's just better that they stay in you memories where you can go back to them whenever you're feeling down. That boy you crushed on all through 8th grade now has a girlfriend, and they're very serious, but you don't care anymore, guys aren't as big a subject to you anymore. And finally you're going towards finding out who you are and what you want to be when you "grow up" (if that ever even happens). High school is the best years to be a kid because you're going against what you should and being yourself, instead of conforming like you have been. High school is fun, at least that's what I think it'll be and from the little bit of it I've experienced, it will. What'll change in High School I know that the moment I step into my high school on the 1st day, my life will begin to change forever. The next four years will be the best years of my life and I'll finally find where I belong, where I really belong. I'm going to make new friends, but NEVER forget the memories I've shared with my old ones. There may be a guy or two, but I won't get in over my head. My music will be #1 in my heart and I'll spend most of my spare time on it. I'll follow my dreams, my heart to where I should be and put faith in God. The way I do things will change, slowly but they will. I'll get off the net and into a real life, somehow. I'll stop doubting myself and never, ever put myself down. My friends will be so important to me and I'll do everything in my power to keep them. The little things won't bother me, as much and it'll be hard to get me mad. High school starts in less than a month and still I haven't done most of the stuff I wanted to, but that's ok because it'll get done someday. The weight I wanted to lose is still there, but it'll go away eventually. My attitude is getting better at least I think so. I haven't practiced enough, but I will. This summer is about friends and enjoying what time I have with them, close to me, with them as my BEST friends, because no one knows what the future will be like. We may stay friends, but probably not, but no matter what we'll have this summer to remember. I'm the only on that will admit all of this, but they know it's coming, they're just scared, we all are. Change is a scary thing and not fun to deal with, but it's almost always for the best. Things will happen in the coming years that we won't expect or maybe even want, but it'll all work out. We'll all find our "place in the sun" eventually. Confusion might take us over or maybe love, but we'll always know it's for the best. And though I know it'll work out, I'm still so scared, so, so scared. Of what�I don't know. Not fitting in? Love? Friends? Classes? Who knows, I'm just scared though. Most likely I'm just scared of so much change at once. It's like a tidal wave that pulls you under and traps you there. So much pushing and shoving that you're not really sure which way is up. But you get to the top and when you do, it's great. I haven't experienced it yet, but deep inside, I KNOW. I know that my life will change, but all in all I'm read. Ready to change, read to meet new people, see new things, learn more, drive, get a boyfriend (((laughs))), reach my dreams and make them real. Ready for me, the real me to shine. |
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