Entry 378
Dear Diary,
I guess I am ready for summer and school to be out because today I got lazy and called my Mom to come pick me up early. She still let me go to Red’s though which was alright even though there weren’t any boys there that I liked.
Entry 379
Dear Diary,
Today was an awful day, my Dad hit me which just hurt me more emotionally than it did physically. I cried most of the day and had no one to talk to because none of my friends were available for me to talk to. I mean they say they will always be there for me, but when it comes down to it that isn’t true because I needed someone to talk to today and I ended up alone.
Entry 380
Dear Diary,
I went to church today and it went pretty good, Dan came and he was back to his old self. Fortunately with what happened to him it made me realize how much I care for him, and now I know I care for him as a friend, and maybe a little more.
Entry 381
Dear Diary,
Tomorrow I am giving the lesson in Bible Study. I am planning on doing it on forgiveness, although I am very nervous, just ‘cause I hate getting up in front of people and having to talk about anything. I hope everything will go smoothly though and I won’t mess up and make an idiot out of myself.
Entry 382
Dear Diary,
I feel so depressed, I feel like my life if falling apart before my very eyes. I’m thinking about killing myself, I mean my life is ruined enough as it is why shouldn’t I, and it just keeps getting worse. So maybe it would be easier for me to go ahead and get it over with.
Entry 383
Dear Diary,
Today was okay, I am still upset though...I feel like I deserve to die. None of my friends cared when I told them how upset I am so that proves right there how much they will miss me (not one bit).
Entry 384
Dear Diary,
I’m very bored right now. Man, I can’t take this crap from anyone, my life is truly falling apart! I’m worth nothing and always will be. None of my friends care about me and never will. At least that’s how they act when I try to talk to them about my problems.
Entry 385
Dear Diary,
I went to Red’s tonight, it was alright I guess. Man, if I survive these teen years, one day I’ll look back in here and read this and realize how truly messed up I once was. I mean sometimes I am so happy and full of joy and other times I feel like bursting into tears.
Entry 386
Dear Diary,
Alright well I have been really down lately and I still am, I mean I am a bit concerned about my attitude lately. I can’t explain how I feel anymore, I wish I could, but I just can’t really put into words what is making me feel so upset all the time, I mean I know I am not insane or anything, thank god, I dunno I am just gonna give it awhile and see.
Entry 389
Dear Diary,
Today was pretty
boring...except I did find out that my sister is coming to visit the weekend
after next. I am really excited because she is going to give us one the puppies
her dog,
Entry 390
Dear Diary,
I found out that
this weekend that my Mom is going to
Entry 391
Dear Diary,
Okay well today at school I had one of the most horrible days I think I will ever have in my whole entire school career. I basically cried in front of my whole first period class because my teacher tried to tell me I didn’t do the make up work she gave me a long time ago and that I need to go to I.S.S and do it, but I didn’t find that necessary because she never gave me any make up work to do in the first place so then when I got real upset because she started to blame me and telling me that I got myself into this situation. So as a result I started to cry and then she started to say that I need to quit acting and put away the tears and go do my work, but I wasn’t acting, I have tried to make myself cry before and I can’t it is virtually impossible, so that just made me more upset. Eventually she took me out in the hall and she finally realized I was being sincere and finally got it through her head that I never got the work to do in the first place and shouldn’t be accounted for something that was never my fault in the first place.
Entry 392
Dear Diary,
Alright well I didn’t go to school today because well really I am too embarrassed to show my face after the whole fiasco that took place yesterday. Plus I will have to stay up until 2 in the morning tonight at Red’s so I need to get some rest anyways, of course we all know that I would never have stayed home under these conditions if my Mom was here, but she isn’t so ya know.
Entry 393
Dear Diary,
Last night was okay...I guess, but I can’t stand Mary’s new boyfriend, Dustin, and the main reason is that he does pot and that is a major turn off. Mary and I didn’t really talk that much partially because I got mad her and didn’t talk to her most of the night.
Entry 394
Dear Diary,
Well, I didn’t go to church this morning so I promised myself I have to go next Sunday, unless something happens where I can’t. I can’t wait to see our new dog that my sister is supposed to bring next weekend, I am so excited she is a lab which is even better because I grew up with labs and dachshunds.
Entry 395
Dear Diary,
Today I didn’t
go to school again, I guess you could say I played true hooky because my Mom
didn’t go to work either and we went to
Entry 396
Dear Diary,
Well today once again we decided we are going to go to Red’s on Friday which will be fun I guess. I hope that Allan is there considering that I like him now, especially since he looks a lot better than he did last year.
Entry 397
Dear Diary,
I didn’t go to church tonight but I made myself promise that I will go next Wednesday, just like I did with going next Sunday. Anyways today our plans changed and we are either going to Red’s or the movies, either one is fine with me.
Entry 398
Dear Diary,
Alright well now Mary, Rebecca, Carol, Amy, and I are supposed to go see The Lost World tomorrow night it should be fun...I hope. I really want to go to Red’s, but none of them will really listen to me, which is kind of annoying, but I just try and brush it off.
Entry 399
Dear Diary,
Well we all went
to the movies tonight and the movie was alright we went to the
Entry 400
Dear Diary,
Kathy and Keith came down last night and they brought a very adorable doggy with them, aw, I love her to death!! She is a golden blondish like lab and has white on the tip of her paws, on the tip of her tail, and on her chest. We named her Maggie which fits her perfectly.
Entry 401
Dear Diary,
I went to church today and Kathy came with us, but Keith didn’t. After church Kathy, Keith, and I decided to go see a movie and we went and saw The Lost World, I didn’t mind seeing it again, at least this time I was able to concentrate on it.
Entry 402
Dear Diary,
I didn’t have to go to school today because it was Memorial Day. Kathy and Keith left really early this morning and we said bye to them. I’m probably going to see them sometime this summer I can’t wait until we are out from school!
Entry 403
Dear Diary,
I went to church for revival tonight it was alright. Amy and I have decided to go see a movie on Friday, and she wants me to invite Ray because she likes him so I did and he said maybe. I don’t really want him to go, but I guess Amy just wants to meet him because they have only talked on the phone with each other through me.
Entry 404
Dear Diary,
It is definite Ray is going to the movies with us Friday night, which I am not too thrilled about, but what can I do. I really just don’t like him anymore sometimes when he talks he sounds like a three year old and it just gets so damn annoying that I just want to slap him.
Entry 406
Dear Diary,
I went to the movies with Ray and Amy today and god I just really can’t stand Ray. Sometimes I swear I just want to slap him right across the face, but I would never do that. We went to go see the worst movie in the world oh my god it sucked so bad, it was Gone Fishing.
Entry 407
Dear Diary,
I really didn’t
do anything today I was like bored the whole time. I talked to Mary a couple
time, but not Amy because she spent the day in